Abby quotes from Accidentally on Purpose

Abby

You just can't stand to see me be better than you at anything. I always wondered what it would be like if I was better at something than you. And now I know. You are so gracious. You got the good hair, the glamorous job and the baby on the way, but do I explode in your face with resentment? No, I keep it in. I control it, because I love you! [throws a tantrum, then goes away]

Abby

Something dirty about to happen?

Abby

It's okay if there is a little.

Abby

I can't believe that you didn't tell them Zack lived here.

Abby

You shut your mouth about that.

Abby

It smells so woodlandy fresh in here. Do you have one of those little air fresheners that looks like a tree?

Abby

Well, it helps that they are both beautiful millionaires. But they never really know who their true friends are. Although, if Demi called me right now, I would dump you in a second.

Abby

Yay! [goes to the bedroom. Suddenly her screams are heard] No! No! [Billie rolls her eyes, then suddenly realizes what Abby read]

Abby

[to Billie] Why don't you manipulate Zack? That's what I do with Nick. He won't even realize you are doing it. It's like killing someone with carbon monoxide. They don't know what's happening. It's just smile, smile, smile, dead.

Abby

How?

Abby

Oh, what a good question, Olivia. If I told you I had a miracle juice that could deliver anti-oxidants and help fight free radicals, how much would you be willing to pay? $600? $800? I promise, use this for one night and you will feel relaxed, energized with a huge smile on your face.

Abby

[realizing that Olivia is pulling her leg] Oh, grow up. Grow up! [Olivia starts teasing her]

Abby

I'd love to get a new couch. But Nick can't part with ours. Our cat had kittens on it and then a couple years later, Nick's grandmother died on that couch.

Abby

She was wearing your fancy teddy? If you are going to seduce two men in someone else's apartment, you should bring your own lingerie. I mean, that's just good manners.

Abby

Oh. Got an e-mail from my mom. Oh my God. It's all over the Internet. [shows Nick the picture]