Zack quotes from Accidentally on Purpose

Zack

I am Zack. I would like to buy you a drink.

Zack

Perfect. You know, I bet my buds I could go a whole day eating and drinking only things that end in "tos": Mojitos, burritos, taquitos.

Zack

I... I don't know what to say.

Zack

[to the doctor] You do this the whole day? This is like robot porn.

Zack

You said you were 32.

Zack

I thought I bring you lunch. I made you a spinach salad, it will be good for...

Zack

The baby. [to Billie] What?

Zack

Hey, who do you think you are talking to? You want to talk to someone, you talk to me.

Zack

Why? You can't handle me yourself, Grandpa?

Zack

Fine, call him. I will fight him too.

Zack

Hey, right back at you, OK? I don't know how they did things in your day, but nowadays, girl say stuff like, "Hey dude, I am not on the pill.".

Zack

Yea. Yeah, I think the coconut milk's working.

Zack

Oh, I am bringing it back. [Davis contorts his face in disgust]

Zack

Dude, enough.

Zack

Are you sure you are okay with this? Because you are not acting like the half of a well oiled machine.