Hey, is this a dolphin, or a porpoise?
...That's a trash bag...
S3Logan Gets Cut Off
CChauncy
Excuse me, children, please leave this room so that Mr. Reese may speak with his son.
Hey, come on, this is my room too. [Chauncy offers him a $50 bill] You know, suddenly, I feel like standing in the hallway. Come along, Zoey. Mr. Reese. [leaves the room along with Zoey]
You're giving me half that money.
[Chauncy closes the door after them]
[feeling concerned] What's going on?
MRMalcolm Reese
[holds up a piece of paper] This is the bill for my United Express credit card.
So?
MRMalcolm Reese
$327, 000?
Oh, I bought a car.
MRMalcolm Reese
Without asking me?
You said I could use the credit card at PCA whenever I wanted.
MRMalcolm Reese
For books, food, maybe a little entertainment.
It's a very entertaining car.
MRMalcolm Reese
It's going back.
What? Dad, that's cruel!
MRMalcolm Reese
I'm cutting you off. [Logan looks shocked] No money, no checkbook, no credit cards.
What? Dad, no! [grabs Chauncy by his suit coat] Chauncy, please talk to him!
CChauncy
Let go of my lapels, or I'll poke you in your neck
MRMalcolm Reese
[as Logan faces him] The credit card. [Logan then feebly gives the credit card to him] Chauncy?
[Chauncy then takes out a pair of scissors]
[now getting frantic] What, what, what? No, no! Wait! No, no! [Malcolm takes the scissors from Chauncy and cuts the credit card in half, causing Logan to scream] [Malcolm then hands the destroyed credit card back to his distressed son, and returns the scissors to Chauncy, before walking over and opening the room's door] Dad!
MRMalcolm Reese
Gentlemen, take the plasma screen, the laptop, the stereo, and all that stuff there.
[Two movers enter the room, head over to Logan's stereo and start to unplug it]
[realizing that his dad is not only taking away his money but also his luxury items as well] No, no! Dad, please! Why? Why the stereo? I need the stereo, I have to listen to music! [The movers pick up and carry away the stereo as Logan continues to plead] Oh, no, please! Put it down! Dad, please! Please! [Malcolm continues to stand firm, ignoring his son's pleas, as the movers return, unplug the plasma screen TV, and carry it out of the room] No! Dad, not the plasma screen! No! Noooooooooooooooooo! [collapses to his knees in distress]
Oh my God, we actually feel bad for Logan Reese.
Unbelievable.
Wow.
That's insane.
He's letting kids throw tomatoes at him?
For a dollar a piece?
Can I have a dollar? (Zoey nudges him)
I miss Logan's plasma screen.
Why couldn't his dad had've taken Logan away and left all the cool stuff? (Logan walks into the room) What's up, poor boy? (Chuckles)
I hate my life.
Yeah, you've looked better.
What's wrong with your hair?
Juanita didn't fluff it. That's what's wrong with it.
Juanita?
The lunch lady. I used to pay her to blow dry and fluff my hair every morning, which is why I'd look so awesome. But now since my evil father closed my bank account, I can't pay her to do it anymore.
Yeah, life is hard.
It is now.
Why should we help him?
He wouldn't help us.
Yeah, but we're good people.
Yeah, I am a good person.
I can't believe I'm transporting Logan Reese's underpants.
Yeah, well if you're really in the mood, try typing up this 26 page history report.
Why'd he have to buy that stupid car and lose all his money? I liked him better when he was rich and obnoxious.
You know, it's really wrong to read another person's e-mail.
You want me to stop?
No! Read it!
Have you heard the song I wrote? I can sing it for you.
No! Please! What'd I ever do to you?
(singing off-key. Throughout the song, Michael is whining about the song and how horrible Stacey's singing is.) You can sip it in the morning, sip it in the evening, even at a quarter to three! 'Cause I like sassafras, you like sassafras, we like sassafras teeeeeeeeeeeeeea!
S3Goodbye Zoey?
What are you guys doing here? Why didn't you tell me you were coming? Mom, what did you do to your hair? Why aren't you answering my questions?
BMr. Brooks
'Cause you're not taking any pauses.
Why are you here?
BMrs. Brooks
Well, we have a little news.
Are you having a baby, Mom?
BMrs. Brooks
No.
BMr. Brooks
No babies. No babies, right?
BMrs. Brooks
No. No.
Hey, you know Chase...he was probably on his way here, then fell down some stairs. Landed on his big bush of a head.
I don't wanna play volleyball with Gretchen.
How icky is she?
Well, what is Chase thinking? Why would you wanna hang out with a girl like that?
Uh, it's pretty obvious.
What?
She's blonde, insanely pretty, she looks like Zoey.
Well, yeah, but... Oh my god, you think that's why he wants to be friends with her?
Totally. I mean, come on, there's nothing appealing about her personality. This is like Psychology 101. He misses Zoey, so he's trying to fill that void with a substitute.
That's so stupid. No one can replace Zoey.
There he is. What are you doing?
You were supposed to meet us at Sushi Rox.
I am, but I invited Gretchen, and she's a little late.
Oh, why'd you invite Gretchen?
'Cause she's my bud. I'll go see if I can find her in the hall.
What's wrong with him? Why can't he see that Gretchen's disgusting?
Tsk. Because she looks like Zoey.
Then Chase needs a psychiatrist.
Ah, give the boy a break.
Dude. Trying to replace a girl with another girl just 'cause they look alike, that's a little sick.
So? You're sick too.
I'm not sick!
Then why do you take at least a hundred digital pictures of yourself every week?
'Cause I have movie star good looks.
See that? You're sicker than I thought.
How can a girl that looks that much like Zoey be so--?
(finishes) Nauseating?!
Yeah.
(sighs) I think it's time.
For what?
An intervention. We gotta talk to Chase about Gretchen.
All of us together?
Naw. (points to Logan with his thumb) I think me and Logan should do it alone. Could get ugly.
How's it coming?
I'm getting it. Why don't you come help me?
Because if I don't send this report in to Mr. Bender, I'm gonna get a 0. (tries to x-out) How do you close this webcam software?
Just click on the little box in the corner.
I see no little box!
Well, just click somewhere!
Click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Zoey 101 pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.