Good morning, little monk. I'm not here to fight you, little monk, but to warn you.
Do you know where the other monks are?
They're in trouble and will your help.
Look, into the crow's eyes.
[The crow zooms in and shows Omi that Jack Spicer, Wuya and Hannibal Roy Bean are planning to raid the temple]
Why are you telling me this?
Just something I thought you ought to know, in case you wanted to do anything about it.
You want me to leave my parents and forfeit my honor. But I will not even they are old, fat and smelly. They need me and tonight I have to clean their teeth.
You're talkin' to Hannibal Roy Bean.
Oh, yeah! Well listen mister musical fruit I eat beans for lunch.
[Omi and Omi robot mother touch the Shen Gong Wu at the same time]
RM Robot Mother
I challenge you to a Xiaolin Showdown. The game is Bamboo Hopping. First to fall, loses.
[heartbroken] My mother…on the side of evil?
RM Robot Mother
When you're a parent, you'll understand. I wager my Orb of Tornami against your Lasso Boa-Boa.
RM Robot Mother
I went through your pocket when you were clipping your father's toenails.
[Zoom in on Omi's face, feeling enraged over being turned against by his own "mother"]
OR Omi & Robot Mother
[in unison] Let's go! XIAOLIN SHOWDOWN!
She's not your mom, she's a robot!
[The Xiaolin monks furiously turn to Jack Spicer]
[gesturing to Wuya and Hannibal; cowering fearfully] Hey, they made me do it. [voiceover of flashback] They made build all other robots. Hannibal Bean then used the Moby Morpher to make my robots look like your relatives. If you had any. [back to the present] We figured if we could break up the dream team, we could take all your Wu.
And it would have worked, too. [points to Omi] If you hadn't shown up.
Let us just say that a little bird told me to.
[As he's being kidnapped] Hey! Who is that? Where am I? I need to use the bathroom.
[To Jack] What about the treasure chest?
What?! That's disgusting! [Pauses] You- you were talking to me?
[Doing a crossword puzzle] What's a four-letter word for idiot?
[Omi is stuck to a cactus]
[cringing] I have a thousand needles in my backside! WHAT DO YOU THINK?!
[lying his head down on the ground] I'd say they can't be more than a half-day's ride ahead. [accidentally gets cactus thorns on his face and screams in pain]
BS Blind Swordsman
You have summoned the spirit of the Blind Swordsman, loyal to whoever possesses the treasure chest.
So, how about showing us how to use our new weapons?
BS Blind Swordsman
Open your mind and trust that your weapon will show you the way.
Shimo Staff! Ha! Oh ho! My weapon and I are most magnificent! [smooch]
Big Bang Meteorang, do your stuff! Ha! Huh? Whoo! Well, I'll be a 3-legged centipede!
Arrow Sparrow! [Boom] Burn, baby, burn!
Blade of the Nebula! Huh? Hah! Whoo! I got the power! Hoo! Hoo! I got the power!
Come, Dojo. We must rescue the blind old man at once!
[Jack, Wuya, and the Blind Old Man touch the sack of Wu at the same time]
I challenge you to a Xiaolin Showdown Trio!
No, we cannot dishonor his challenge.
Our Thorn of Thunderbolt and Silk Spitter against your Mantis Flip Coin and the Treasure of the Blind Swordsman.
The game is Emperor of the Train. Last man standing wins.
JW Jack, Wuya, & Blind Old Man
Let's go! Xiaolin Showdown!
Perhaps you I'd like to surrender now.
Perhaps you I'd like to keep your disses to yourself, four-eyes!
[Record scratches]
Even better! Time to double-team, Mr. No-eyes! Ha ha! Jack's on an evil rant now! Thorn of Thunderbolt!
Way to kick butt! Especially when you can't see butt.
I do not understand. How can someone without sight fight so well?
[Sighs] Again with the questions. It is quite simple. I use my mind to see rather than my eyes. [loudly] DIDN'T YOU HEAR ME BEFORE?! That is the secret to the treasure chest. The answers to all your questions lie inside. You just have to look.
The treasure chest! We left it back on the trail!
Uh, you left it back on the trail!
Now, if you'll excuse me, I really must find the bathroom.
Omi The Treasure of the Blind Swordsman is gone!
This is all my fault for leaving it behind.
Oh, what no good hombre could have taken it?
Hmm. I have a pretty good idea.
[At night, wolf howls]
With the Treasure of the Blind Swordsman mine, soon, the rest of the world will follow. Raah! [laughing evilly as its magic shines forth for him]
Check out the spring in my step! Wudai Mars, Fire!
No, the old hag won't think small like that. She'll be thinkin'...
Yeah, anyway, Raimundo. Where I come from we have a sayin' follow the oil.
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These quotes come from Wikiquote's Xiaolin Showdown pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License .
