Clay quotes from Xiaolin Showdown

Jack

Me? Fighting for good? In a bathrobe? Forget it. Next time we meet, we're enemies again.

Jack

But maybe some time, if we're not fighting over Shen Gong Wu, we can all go for ice cream. My treat.

Omi

Yes that would be most nice. We could get a Monday!

Clay

Sundae.

Omi

Even better!

Raimundo

Come on, Omi! It’s a classic gong game!

Omi

Okay, I hear your concerns and I will take them under advisement with the apprentice’s. Clay, Kimiko?

Clay

I reckon’ we don't have a better choice.

Kimiko

Let’s give a shot.

Raimundo

What?! You’re believing Jack Spicer over ME?! That’s it! I'm finding my own way in, and anyone who wants can go with me!

Clay

Two-Ton Tunic!

Raimundo

Eye of Dashi!

Kimiko

Third-Arm Sash!

Omi

Orb of Tornami!

Omi

Dragon X Kumei! WATER!

Clay

EARTH!

Kimiko

FIRE!

Raimundo

WIND!

Omi

It is one step forward and two steps back. Perhaps the secret lies within the food. I shall eat until I am big! [starts scarfing down some food]

Clay

You know, we got a saying down in Texas: "You can't put a 20-gallon head in a 10-gallon hat."

Raimundo

Yeah. You just made that up. Hey, here's an idea! Watch this! Changing Chopsticks! [uses the chopsticks to shrink down the food] Now you can eat every last bite.

Omi

[finds the solution to the problem] Raimundo, that is the answer! I will grow bigger backwards!

Kimiko

You got me on that one.

Omi

Clay, may I please borrow the Reversing Mirror? Raimundo, may I please borrow the Changing Chopsticks?

Clay

Where are you going with this, Omi?

Omi

Changing Chopsticks! Reversing Mirror! [combines the effects of both the Wu and grows into a massive size] Now there is nothing I cannot accomplish! Except perhaps explaining to Master Fung about the temple ceiling.

Omi

Cyclops is still unstoppable. And now because of me, we have lost two Shen Gong Wu.

Clay

Don't be so down on yourself, Omi. I'm the one who blew the showdown.

Omi

Yes, but only because I was not there to fight your battle. It is I to blame for your most humiliating defeat.

Clay

Uh-huh. Excuse me while I crawl under a rock.

Omi

Since you clearly cannot get along without me, I will return to regular size. Changing Chopsticks! [shrinks down and finds he's a little shorter than his friends] Hmm. I do not remember my fellow warriors being quite so big.

Clay

Yeah. Maybe you ought to give that bronco another ride.

Omi

Changing Chopsticks! [shrinks a little bit] Changing Chopsticks! [shrinks a little more] Changing Chopsticks!

Kimiko

[kneels down] Maybe you should stop while there's something left.

Raimundo

You know, you used the Reversing Mirror and the Changing Chopsticks to get into this. I'll bet you need 'em both to get out.

Clay

[sighs] I'm afraid 'cause of me, we're shy one Reversing Mirror.

Omi

I have much thinking to do. Can you carry me to the temple? If I walk, I fear it will take many months.

Clay

You okay down there, partner?

Omi

Oh, yes! Dojo's earwax is most convenient! But I do wish I had a better view. Ah, that is much better!

Better hope I don't sneeze!

Omi

Nooo, you have very clean sinuses! I thank you!

Clay

[as Jack uses the Mind Reader Conch; thinking] That Jack is slower than a three-legged cow in quicksand!

Jack

What!? I'm faster than any three-legged cow! [gets hit by Omi]

Omi

[thinking] Ugh! Enough out of you.

Kimiko

[thinking] Oh, shut up!

Raimundo

[thinking] Stupid dragon.

Clay

[thinking] Put a dadgarn sock in it.

[annoyed] Hey! I heard that!

Sorry, Dojo.

Clay

[thinking] I can't believe the way Kimiko threw a hissy fit today. She gets angrier than a cat in a hot tub of water.

Kimiko

[outraged] Angry? Me? I am not angry. I'M THE LEAST ANGRIEST PERSON I KNOW!!!

Looks like my young monks had trouble sleeping last night.

Raimundo

Actually, I had a pretty gross dream. Jack Spicer was in it.

Clay

Me too! Did he do his evil laugh?

Kimiko

Yeah, and it was so annoying.

Now that Jack has the Shadow of Fear, it's very possible that he has been visiting your dreams.

Kimiko

Talk about wanting to wash my brain out.

Raimundo

Everybody ready to go kick some Jack Spicer's butt?

Clay

Does it bull like that snort?

Kimiko

Yeah, I couldn't have put it better myself.

Omi

Uhh...I have some scroll to study right now.

Raimundo

What?

Jack

Uh, I'm not here to raid your Shen Gong Wu.

Who's stopping you? Well, Jack, if you help me find the Monarch Wings, I'll make it worth your while.

Jack

Are you asking if we can form an evil alliance?

Put it there, baby. [gives Jack a wet willy]

Kimiko

Omi, what happened?

Omi

I am afraid, uh… Mala Mala Jong has come to life.

Raimundo

I can't believe we got here too late.

Clay

Oh, man, I feel more embarrassed than a mule at the Kentucky Derby.

According to the scroll, the rise of Mala Mala Jong will allow a new Shen Gong Wu to be revealed. It is called the Emperor Scorpion. Whoever possesses it will have control over all Shen Gong Wu. If we can find it, we can use it to break Mala Mala Jong apart before it turns into the Fearsome Four.

Raimundo

Excellent! Great ending and not too long. Dragged a little in the middle though.

Kimiko

Don't get too excited, Raimundo. Here comes the bad part.

If the Emperor Scorpion falls into the wrong hands, the Fearsome Four will be unstoppable. This will be our only chance to save the world from certain destruction.

Raimundo

Why does there always have to be a bad part?

Kimiko

I can't believe how badly we messed up.

Raimundo

Now that Spicer is in control of the Fearsome Four there's no stopping him.

Clay

Yeah. It's not everyday a fella is responsible for the end of the world.

Omi

No! Stop! When Mala Mala first came together I could've called for your help. It is my fault. But I...ah choose to do it alone. I may have forgotten to mention that before.

Raimundo

It dosen't matter now...woah!

Working together is more than just fighting together. It is knowing how to use each other's strengths wisely.

Raimundo

Hey, could somebody please translate.

Clay

Well, I reckon Master Fung is speaking of our elements.

Kimiko

In other words, we should focus on what we do best.

Cheer up, kiddo. You'll get another chance to save the world.