[Alex picks up book]
RGRandom Girl
[gasps] Alex Russo has a book!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
(shouting at Harper at the Grand Canyon) HARPER! I GIVE YOU PERMISSION!
WHAT?! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!
I GIVE YOU PERMISSION!
A MISSION TO DO WHAT?
THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE!
MISSION IMPOSSIBLE? I ALREADY SAW THAT!
MEET ME BACK AT THE HOUSE!
OKAY!
OH, SO YOU HEAR THAT? (leaves)
(after Alex gives a speech on what she realized about the structure of the Helpers Club) That was a wonderful speech... (gets excited) Worthy of a ribbon!
(Happy Helpers cheer)
(frustrated) No! I dont want a ribbon!
It's either the ribbon or suspension.
(takes the ribbon) Oh, its a lovely ribbon.
I got a date! I got a date! I got a date!
Oh, Max. I told you. If a girl walks in and asks if we do take-out, it doesn't mean she wants to take you out.
At least give me a spell to fix this!
[calls] You're on your own, jerkface!
Thank you! [takes out wand, and tries to cast spell] 'You're on your own, jerkface!'
MMom
I'm a bit of a practical joker myself.
Really?
MMom
Yeah I've played a lot of jokes on your father over the years
Like what?
MMom
Well like, wadding up his clothes so they get all wrinkled. (laughs) Or putting a sign on his back that says something hilarious... like umm.. "My knees hurt in the morning." (laughs) or or umm..."I could use a good shower." (laughs harder)
Mom, those are the worse practical jokes I've ever heard.
MMom
What?! Maybe you just don't understand them the note says "My knees hurt in the morning." (laughing) That way when people read it they'll think he's a stinky geezer. (laughs hysterically while jumping up and down) (she looks at Max's expressionless face)
MMom
Don't you get it? You don't get it?
(waves her wand) What he did.
Who wrote down one syllable?
I did!
You were supposed to write titles.
That is infuriating isn't it, dad? Doesn't it make you just want to... throw a table.
I'm sure there's a book titled "One Syllable" out there somewhere.
No Alex, you stay, you're not disqualified. I got that fair and square. [stands up] YOUR MOTHER IS STACKING THE TEAMS AGAINST US!!
That's what I'm talking about!
What? You heard her! She cheated.
And I'm livid. You know what? They should both be disqualified out of here.
Oh, this is totally bogus!
Dad's pouting 'cause he lost a fight again,
No! We are not fighting, that's one thing we are not doing; we're not fighting. So stop fighting! The neighbors can hear us!
NNeighbor
That's it! I'm calling the cops.
(moves his arms like he's karate chopping)
Karate Kid!
We are not fighting! We're trying to make a good impression!
[To Justin] You want to hear a billion year old guy talk about falling? Just go hang out with Grandpa
[to Tutor] I like you...I hope you don't wreck it.
[Justin walks into the Wizard's Lair]
What are you doing?
You'll be interested to know that I've found the perfect present for dad.
[gasps][whispers to skull staff] She's going to turn her lips into a zipper!
Oh! That's a good shot! How long have you been working on that one?
Since the day that mom came home and said "Look! There's your little sister, Justin!"
[huge alien spaceship lands in Waverly Place]
Can you guys believe it! Aliens have landed on Waverly Place!
Yeah well who's gonna tell them they can't park there? They're gonna get towed...
[Aliens aiming guns at the family]
Jerry! Help us!
[Jerry gasps. Looks back and forth between family and milkshake machine.]
Ahh!
[Runs to protect milkshake machine]
Not the milkshake machine! PLEASE!!!!
[To Family] I knew it!
LALead Alien
What happened? Where did the milkshake machine go?
Justin, you did it!
[Justin walks into the room holding one of the alien's guns]
Luckily one of those aliens dropped this thing and I was able to quickly figure out how to operate their advanced technology. It's a switch!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Wizards of Waverly Place pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.