Scenes with Panda 85
Panda[gasps] Miki-Chan! [The cougar lies down next to the body pillow and purrs while Thunderbolt meows and climbs on top of it. While he is mewing, he's shaking the part where Miki-Chan's face is printed. Panda is sobbing] Oh, Miki-Chan! [He pulls away from the window and his brothers put their attention to Panda] That's It! They have gone to far!
Ice Bear's casa [punching hand] no es su casa.
But how are we going to get rid of these cougars?
Panda
Not a problem. [He pulls out phone from behind back and starts tapping the phone] We'll just do some research. [Panda starts looking on Everyone's Tube. On the search bar, he has put "How to get cougars out of house." ] Nope. No. [He scrolls down] Nope. Nope. Nothing on cougars. But there's a ton of cat videos.
[looking at Panda's phone] Huh. Well, cougars are just bigger cats, right?
Panda
Yeah, I guess.
Well, then, it's time to learn everything about cats.
[The episode begins at nighttime with a full shot of the Bears' cave. Water can be heard running during the shot until it is turned off. The shot changes to the inside of the cave with the bathroom door to the right of the shot. Grizzly walks out of the shower wrapped in a towel, and with another towel wrapped around his head]
[scatting; opens the fridge] Huh, so many choices...
[A silhouette dashes behind Grizzly]
[confused] Huh?... Hello?... Anyone there?
[Another bear jumps in the scene wearing a black full-body ninja suit]
GAGrizzly as Robot Ninja
AHA! [Grizzly steps back, startled, and lets out a gasp] Hello, my friend. I've been sent here to destroy you.
Oh, then, allow me to introduce myself... HI-YAH!
[Grizzly swiftly rips off his towel, throwing it at the Ninja]
GAGrizzly as Robot Ninja
[takes the towel off of his head and grows shocked expression] It can't be...
My name... [rips the towel on his head off, revealing his gray hair and blue bow because he is playing Crowbar Jones] is Crowbar Jones, and I'm the bear that's gonna bring you down.
[The Ninja throws some punches while grunting. Grizzly as Crowbar Jones whips the Ninja with the towel two times. The second hit results with a delayed reaction from the Ninja, eventually falling over and onto his back]
[Grizzly recording gets reversed a few times, causing Crowbar Jones to repeat that same phrase; episode now set in actual reality]
GGrizzly
[laughs excitingly] This's looking so good! A few tweaks here and there and the world will see my masterpiece!
[Panda walks into the scene]
Panda
Hey, Grizz, do you where all the bedsheets went? I-I can't find any of them... Wh- You're making another "Crowbar Jones"? [Grows a stern look] Wait, Pando isn't in this one, right?
GGrizzly
Who, Pando? No no...
[Grizzly and Panda looked surprised as they hear Grizzly as Pando's voice]
[on the Computer in the same nasally high-pitched voice] AAH! No, I love her, even though I know absolutely nothing about her or-- WOO!
[Grizzly as Pando falls over]
GGrizzly
Oooh, that Pando, yeah, he's totally in it.
Panda
[annoyed] Ugh, come on, maaan! Why are you always embarrassing me?! UGH! [throws face into paws]
[At the President's office]
PAMr. Penguin as the President
Congratulations, Crowbar Jones. You've done it again! Now the world is a safer place because of you, chip chip Cherio!
I'm just doing my job, sir.
[Grizzly as Crowbar Jones blinks his eye]
PAMr. Penguin as the President
Well, a job well done deserves recognition and a medal of awesomeness. [He holds an album] Also your album went platinum while you were saving the world.
Ah, stop it. This is too much. I couldn't have done it without my trusty sidekick, Pando.
[as he hold a jar of pickles] Oh, thank you, Mr. Crowbar.
Panda
Huh, Huh?
MThe Mailman
Ooh! [to the Deer] Not half bad!
Would either of you like a pickle? [The jar's lid hits Grizzly as Pando] Aah!
[The Rabbits laugh expect Panda]
[off-screen] Aah! Oh, my butt, my face!
Panda
[groans] All right, here we go.
[The episode begins when Ranger Tabes runs through the forest]
All right! [a beaver cuts the tree down using his teeth] American beaver, check. [We see a mother quail and her chicks. Ranger Tabes comes out of the bushes] California quails, 1, 2, 3, 4. Check. [The quails run away, We see a beehive] Honeybee hive, check. And my three favorite bears.
[Grizzly, Panda, and Ice Bear looked exhausted]
Check, check, and check. [to the Bears] Thanks for coming along on my morning rounds, boys.
Panda
How do you this every day?
Ice Bear should be in bed. Fridge.
Well, this is my job, fellas. The balance of nature is fragile, and it is my sworn duty to protect it! [a ladybug crawls on a leaf] From the lowliest of bugs...
Panda
[off-screen] Ick.
[off-screen] ...To the most majestic of eagles, nature is my way of life.
Wow, You're an inspiration to us all, Tabes. Could we, uh, like, take a break, though?
Panda
Yeah, I'm literally made of sweat right now.
Oh, of course. Just make sure not to disturb anything. There are endangered butterflies in this area.
[A butterfly flies to the bears]
[The bears run away]
[The bears arrive at the trailer]
You sure this is it, Pan Pan?
Panda
Yeah, I think so.
Hey, uh, Tabes? Are you in there? You ready for morning rounds?
[He knocks at the door]
DTDana Tabes
[singsong voice] ♪ Coming! ♪ [she wear arts and crafts clothes] Oh. Hey, there, bears! Good to see you!
[Kirk barks happily at them]
Uh, good to see you, too?
DTDana Tabes
[as she grabs Grizzly] Come on inside. Make yourselves at home.
Panda
So, uh, why aren't you dressed for work?
DTDana Tabes
I'm glad you asked, Stripes. 'Cause I quit!
GPGrizzly, Panda and Ice Bear
WHAT?!
DTDana Tabes
Oh, yeah. And it's been great. So much free time. I've been trying out all sorts of new things, like baking! [she holds a cookie tray with burned cookies] Cookie?
Panda
Um, okay, sure.
DTDana Tabes
Good, right? I like to bake while making crafts for my Internet store.
Hey, that's that's great. But, um...
DTDana Tabes
Take a look. It's a pinecone bird. They're selling like hotcakes.
Um, happy to hear it, Ranger Tabes, But I...
DTDana Tabes
Oh, no, no, no. [Kirk coughs] Please, boys, call me Dana.
[whispering] Tabes isn't her first name?
DTDana Tabes
Darn glue not super enough.
Look, Tabes I mean Dana, look, it's nice catching up and all, but we just were wondering, why'd you quit being a ranger?
Panda
The forest needs you.
DTDana Tabes
[sighs] Guys, the forest is better off without me. First, I destroy that deer's chance at love. What's NEXT?! I accidentally knock some frogs into a wood chipper?! I broke my oath to protect the forest and everything in it. Besides, now I can spread joy through the Internet. [off-screen] See, a pinecone owl.
DTDana Tabes
[off-screen] And a pinecone porcupine.
DTDana Tabes
[off-screen] And how about a pinecone...
[as he holds a picture of young Tabes and her mother] Hey, Tabes, this isn't who you are! You are a ranger at heart.
DTDana Tabes
[as she grabs the picture] No. That's who I was. Now I'm just a normal person who can wear pajamas whenever. [The computer chimes] Oh, happy day, I've made a sale. "Your pinecone is forthcoming, friend."
BBBrody Brogan
Now, let's get to know our bros. Bears, tell us about yourselves.
Well, I'm happily self-unemployed, taking care of my two baby bros.
Panda
And I am single and ready to mingle.
[Silent; a guy in the audience coughs]
BBBrody Brogan
[chuckles] How about our next group of guys?
GGriff
Hey, what's up? I'm Griff. I'm a renegade cop who protects the streets and keeps them clean.
IIssac
Issac is a five-star chef.
TTom
And I have a girlfriend!
[The audience cheers and applause]
Panda
What?
[The screen is black]
[Ice Bear opens his eyes]
Panda
[echoing] Shh. He's waking up.
[Ice Bear closes his eyes]
Bro? [Ice Bear opens his eyes again] Little bro? You okay?
[Ice Bear got a red lump on his head]
Ice... [Grizzly and Panda lean in closer to Ice Bear] Ice... [clamps both paws on his head] Oh, man, I need some ice for my head.
[Grizzly and Panda gasp and back away, shocked to hear Ice Bear talking in first person]
[stands up while rubbing the lump on his head] Oh, jeez, that really did a number on me. Boy, I sure hate it when that happens. Hey, am I right? You know, like, sometimes you can just be walking. "I'm going here, I'm going there, I'm minding my own business." Then, Bam! Unconscious. You guys know what I mean, right? [Grizzly and Panda stare in disbelief at Ice Bear, look at each other and then back at Ice Bear] No? Hey, maybe it's just me. Boy, nothing like almost dying to get your appetite going, though. [pat Grizzly's right shoulder] Cool. All right, I'm gonna go grab some lunch. Stay cool, bros. [steps over the hammer] Oh, whoa, shouldn't leave tools around. Someone could get hurt - again. [winks his eye] Ha.
[Baby Grizz is taken to the principal's office]
BPBaby Panda
[to Baby Ice Bear] Oh, man, maybe Grizz did so well that he's getting some sort of prize.
RRonnie
No way, you guys. Going to the principal's office is like practically a death sentence.
[Moby draws a hangman with the letters "GRIZZ" on a piece of paper, and does a death expression. Baby Panda gasps]
RRonnie
Yeah, he takes you into his dungeon of an office, a dark, old place where you can't hear the laughter of another kid for miles. [in another scene, Baby Grizz writes lines on chalkboards under the principal's supervision, until the former turns into chalk himself] He makes you write lines and lines on four giant chalkboards while he just sits there on his throne, watching you, making you write in chalk until you become the chalk. [The principal laughs evilly in the room of children that were turned into chalk, one of which breaks after it falls onto the floor.]
BPBaby Panda
[back in the classroom] Oh, my gosh! [to Baby Ice Bear] Bro, we have to rescue Grizz before it's too late. You have any plans in mind?
[Baby Ice Bear shows Baby Panda a mini-mine made from pencils and glue.]
BPBaby Panda
Maybe something a little less harmful. [puts down the mini-mine]
RRonnie
Hey, we want to help you guys.
BPBaby Panda
You don't still think we're lame?
RRonnie
No way. You guys are cool. Besides, the principal has tortured one too many students. It's time to take down that tyrant once and for all.
BPBaby Panda
Yay! Ooh. But how are we gonna get to the principal's office?
RRonnie
Oh, we got a plan.
[Ice Bear gasps] WHAAAT?! [Panda continues to fiddle with the console in hopes of steering the ship back to Earth] Wait. This is for real?! We're actually in space?! There's got to be some way to turn this thing around, right?
Panda
I'm trying!
[the ship steers to the direction of Earth...]
PGPanda/Grizzly
Yeah!/Whoo-hoo!
[...then to the direction of the Sun.]
[The bears scream as they prepare to go into the Sun.]
Panda
[The bears run away from the console] D'oh. There's got to be another way out. Oh, geez, oh, geez, oh, geez. [covers his eyes] Guys, I'm so sorry for dragging you into this.
Yeah, no time, Panda, okay? [they find an escape pod] Look! An escape pod! Come on!
[Grizz and Ice Bear hop into the escape pod, but it can hold only two people]
Aw, nuts. [they both turn around] Uh, there's not enough room for all of us. [Panda closes the pod] Got to find a... Huh? [muffled] Panda! Wait. What are you doing?
[Panda breaths heavily, and launches the pod]
PANDA, NO! [inside the pod] Panda! Panda! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?! [Panda turns on the monitor to communicate with Grizz and Ice Bear] Aah!
Panda
Hey. Hello? Bros, I-I don't know if this thing is on, but I just wanted to say I'm sorry it's ending like this... and for being selfish. You guys might mess stuff up sometimes, sure, but you're just being you.
Panda
And you know what? That's what I love about you. So I guess this is goodbye, bros. [touches the camera with his right paw, Grizz also touches the monitor where Panda's paw is] Take care of Miki-chan.
Panda? Panda? [monitor goes static, and soon there is no more signal.]
[both Grizz and Ice Bear cry] No! Panda!
[in the last moments, Panda looks up, and tearfully shuts his eyes as the ship goes into the Sun...]
[After the baby bears celebrate from being saved from the dog by a crow]
BGBaby Grizzly
Listen guys, I'm sorry for fighting. We shouldn't let that dumb old job get in the way of us being bros.
BPBaby Panda
You're right, Grizz. Let's never fight again.
[They will.]
[The bears walk out the door and look up to find their new mom they have ordered jumping down from a helicopter. She lands so hard, the bears cough from the flying dust. They look up and watch with awe as their new buff mom introduces herself]
GPGrizzly and Panda
Whoa!
TTank
[removes her helmet and throws it to a side] Hey! I'm your new mom, Tank! You kids like basketball?
[As the bears look on, Tank dribbles the basketball and makes a giant leap, dunks the ball while touching the backboard by her legs and lands back to the ground]
[run around Tank in jubilation] Whoo-hoo!
Panda
Crazy! Where did you learn to dunk like that?!
Teach us how to dunk, please!
TTank
[takes the basketball from Grizz and spins it] Well, I'm afraid I can't do that. [steps towards the bears] You bears are too weak and puny! [refers to herself] You gotta get buff. Like me! Now, drop and give me 30!
Panda
Yeah, I don't think I...
TTank
[goes behind the bears] Come on, now! I'm gonna whip you boys into shape! [pushes the bears into doing push-ups]
[The bears groan as they do the push-ups]
TTank
That's enough. [gets the bears to stand] 30 laps! Let's go, let's go, let's go! Yeah! [The bears proceed to run around the outside of the cave] Feel the burn! Come on! Move it!
[The screen is black]
TPT-Pain
Yo! Wakey-wakey! [Panda's eyes open to a man in the middle of a mist] Hey, Hey. Hey, man. You okay?
Panda
Wha... Where... [scrolls his eyes around] What...? Have people told you that you look like T-Pain?
TPT-Pain
Yeah, man, all the time - probably because I am T-Pain.
Panda
[gasps in surprise] What? No way! [sits up] Oh, man, Mr. Pain, I am such a huge fan!
TPT-Pain
[laughs] Hey, man, be cool, be cool. Please, man, call me "T."
Panda
[chuckles] Okay, T. [looks around] Um, T, am I in heaven?
TPT-Pain
Nah, bro. [The mist clears as he laughs to reveal the living space of a tour bus] You're on my tour bus, dude!
Panda
Oh. [they both get up] Wait, isn't the concert in the other direction?
TPT-Pain
[takes out a remote control] Yeah, but I forgot my phone, so we were, like, headed back to my house to pick it up until the tour bus stopped right in front of you. [turns on the CCTV footage of Panda screaming; when the tour bus stops, he faints] And that's when you fainted.
Panda
[in disbelief] Ugh, this is the worst day of my life.
TPT-Pain
Nah, man, [nudges Panda] it's cool. Come on, let me give you a tour of the place. [they proceed inside]
[Plays the video, "Scared By Cucumbers"]
Yo, Internet! We back at it again at the bear cave.
Panda
We just found out that our bro is freaked out by cucumbers! [laughs as Grizz shows a cucumber] Check it out.
[Ice Bear is chopping onions in the kitchen. Grizzly places a cucumber near him. Ice Bear turns around, surprised by the sight of the cucumber and flies away as the music plays; Grizz and Panda laugh]
[Outside the bathroom]
Panda
Cuke boys!
[places a cucumber on the floor] Cuke boys.
[Ice Bear comes out after having a shower, and opens the door. He is shocked to find the cucumber and quickly flees, as the music plays again and more laughter is heard]
[Grizzly and Panda run around the cave with another cucumber]
[Ice Bear is sitting on the sofa playing a video game. Behind him, Panda snickers as he drops the cucumber on the sofa]
[offscreen; snickering as well] Nothing.
[Ice Bear turns to his left. He shrieks when he finds the cucumber there, jumps to the ceiling and climbs away, with music playing again and more laughter]
Panda
[A cucumber is put on the table] Okay, up until now, we've been using a cucumber, [tilts the camera to show Grizzly with a jar of pickles] but what about pickles!
[As Ice Bear is shaving, Grizz drops a pickle from the bathtub. Ice Bear finds the pickle and proceeds to eat it, to Grizz's disbelief]
[the same cucumber] Just cucumbers, then.
[Ice Bear is fixing the vacuum as a cucumber rolls on the floor to the right.]
[whispers] Do it. [Another cucumber rolls to the left] Do more, do more, do a lot more! [Five more cucumbers roll. Ice Bear looks to his right, and freaks out as he tries to shun the cucumbers but stumbles as music plays again and more laughter is heard. As he leaves from sight, the vacuum starts to fly (Panda: The vacuum!)]
Panda
Okay, wait. [giggling] Why, wait. We just had a great idea. [to Grizzly] Check this out.
[Ice Bear is preparing dinner as Panda, dressed in a cucumber outfit, walks in from behind with Grizz laughing from behind the camera]
Panda
'Sup, bro.
Ice Bear is preparing di- [taken aback to find Panda's cucumber outfit and throws him out of the cave; Panda screams as he is sent flying through the window]
[at the hospital; Panda is severely injured] Hey, um... Well, I hope you liked the video. [Panda groans] Don't forget to like, comment, and subscribe. [A "PLZ DONATE" button appears on screen] Or donate to help us pay for our hospital fees.
[Panda is revealed to have survived the zombie attack, and tries to serve the others who have turned into zombies salad]
Panda
[serves a bowl to Ice Bear] Okay, here's your vegan Thai salad, [serves another salad to Grizz] and here's yours. Enjoy.
[shoves his bowl off the table] Brains.
Panda
Huh?
[throws his bowl away] BRAINNNS!!
Panda
What? You guys need to eat your veggies! You can't just have brains all the time!
[appears from outside the kitchen] Brains?
Panda
[irritated] Ugh! Why am I allergic to a hundred things but immune to zombies?!
[Charlie turns back to his Bigfoot form]
[checks his hands] Whoa. I'm not normal!
[from offscreen] ...definitely the best pizza place.
[turns to find the Bears having a picnic] Bears!
GPGrizzly and Panda
[the Bears turn to see Charlie] Huh?
Panda
Oh, hey!
All right, what's my name? Where did you guys come from? Do you - do you have the urge to arrest me?
Panda
You're Charlie, of course!
We came from the cave and wanted to have a picnic with you.
Ice Bear always has urge to arrest.
[heaves a sigh of relief] Phew. Back to normal.
[raises his paw] So? [shows him the pizza they are having] Do you want to join?
[takes his seat] Sure, that'd be great.
[takes his slice] Thanks, fellas.
[The Bears lift up their paws to reveal they are now fathers to their baby counterparts (from their pouches), astonishing Charlie]
BGBaby Grizzly
Oh boy, pizza time!
BPBaby Panda
I hope my slice is vegetarian.
Panda
[pulls out a part of his slice to share with Baby Panda] It is!
[The Bears share their slices with their baby counterparts, and as the Baby Bears are munching, Baby Charlie pops out from Charlie's pouch as well]
BCBaby Charlie
Y'all gonna share with me?
Well, the more the merrier. [shares his slice with Baby Charlie as they all dig in]
We Bare Bears · 130 quotes
