[sings] I'm a rumor weed! I'm a rumor weed! A tiny little story is all I need to make a big mess! I'm a rumor weed!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
[enters the backyard with a weed wacker] All right, Alfred, I am executing Plan A!
[from radio] Ah! Good luck, Master Larry!
[LarryBoy starts up the weed wacker and tries to kill The Weed, but it's unaffected. A short pause.]
Um, I'm gonna... I'm gonna try Plan B!
All right. Trying Plan B!
[after LarryBoy crashes his LarryMobile into the sewer]
Master Larry, are you in the tunnel? Master Larry?!
All right, Alfred! I'm in the tunnel! Alfred?
M-Master Larry, can you hear me?
Alfred! Can you hear me?! [gasps] The radio isn't working.
The sewer walls must be blocking the transmission. [gasps in shock] That means I can't give him his--
[panics] --DIRECTIONS!!! What do I do, WHAT DO I DO?!
What to do, what to do? I must save him!
ALFRED!
[hops off his chair] I'm coming, Master Larry! [heads to the garage and hops on the scooter] Help is on the way! [drives off]
Okay. I can do this. I am... after all... a superhero! [then he notices the Weed sitting] Oh, look! It's just a little one! [hops over to the Weed] What was I so nervous about? You've met your match, Weed! I'm gonna take you, and I'm gonna...
[From behind him, the real Mother Weed suddenly emerges from the darkness. LarryBoy takes notice and gets scared.]
Mother!
[stops beside Scooter's police car] Oh, yes! Officer, I need your help! LarryBoy is battling a giant weed in the sewer system--
[spots Alfred] AHHHH!! THE ROBOT! [he starts engine and drives away]
[As Alfred is surrounded by the angry citizens ranting at him.]
I'm not a robot, I'm... British!
I'm warning you! I'm a super--! [gets thrown against the wall] --hero.
MWMother Weed
Face it! You can't stop this weed; thanks to your friends out there, I'm getting bigger by the minute! HahahahahaMWAHAHAHA!
Soooo, did you hear the one about Alfred?
Wha-?
I'm not shaking anything! It's shaking me! [the ground shakes harder and harder until, all of a sudden, the Mother Weed bursts out of the sewer]
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! (Alfred tries to run but the mother weed grabs him. Then she wraps herself around the City Hall as everyone watches her holding Alfred)
CCrowd
What a nice man! (The Mother Weed looks at Alfred, and when nice words are spread, Alfred smiles and they both look down at everyone. Suddenly the ground starts to shake from under the mother weed as everyone backs away from the weed. Due to all the kind things said by all the city folk, more flowers sprout all over the weed until her head becomes a flower, defeating her for good.)
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! (Alfred is shown sliding down the stem and lands safely)
MBMayor Blueberry
We're sorry for thinking that you were a robot.
We didn't even ask you if it was true!
Oh, I forgive you... I forgive you all! [looks around] Has anybody seen LarryBoy?
[A beat-up LarryBoy drags himself out of the sewers by his plunger-ears]
Hey, Alfred... everyone... someone was telling me that you were a robot- [Everybody shushes him loudly] Is there a flower show?
[Everyone laughs, thinking he was joking, as the camera cuts to a frontal aerial view of the building where the Rumor Weed wrapped herself, as the camera pans around it and a flower flies around. The flower comes closer and closer to the screen as the score concludes]
[As Jimmy and Jerry Gourd are on the countertop, disguised as Bob and Larry.]
Now, we got a letter today, from a kid named, uh... Jimmy, who lives in a place near... Texas somewhere.
Yeah, Texas!
This kid, uh, Jimmy, says that he knows this other kid named, uh...
Jerry!
Yeah, sure! Jerry! This other kid named Jerry! Now, Jimmy says that this kid, Jerry, is soooo selfish, one of the most selfish kids in the whole world, so selfish, it just makes you sick!
No. No, he's not.
Who's not?
Jerry. He's not selfish, he's nice.
No! He's selfish! Remember? The letter?
Uh, no! Jimmy said that Jerry was nice, and that other kid... Hubert was selfish!
Hubert?
Yeah. Hubert.
Who's gonna name their kid Hubert? Look, Jerry- er, Larry! In the letter we got today from that kid Jimmy who lives near Texas somewhere, it said that his friend Jerry was selfish! That's what it said, remember?
[angrily; his Larry costume falls off] You want a piece of me?!
Hey! Whoa! Oh, man! You're the one who said Jerry! I was gonna--
[offscreen] Hey! What's going on here?!
[Jerry puts Larry costume back on upside down. Bob and Larry enter the countertop.]
Yeah! What are you guys doing?!
Uh, hi there! I'm Bob the Tomato!
And I'm not selfish!
[hops to Jimmy and Jerry] You're not Bob the Tomato, I'm Bob the Tomato! Jimmy? Jerry? Is that you? What in the world are you guys doing?
Oh, man! We were just trying to help you guys out.
Yeah, help.
[Jimmy and Jerry hops over to QWERTY, who is turned off.]
Hi, QWERTY! Ya got a verse? QWERTY? QWERTY? Uh, QWERTY? Oh, great. Somebody turned off QWERTY! WHO TURNED OFF QWERTY?! [Bob sighs and shakes his head in frustration] Uh, let's see, control, shift, tab, delete. Uh, no, no. [Jerry briefly leaves] Shift, escape, six, option. Uh, no, uh, function, escape, tab, L...
[comes back with a cardboard sign] Hey, Jimmy.
Oh, would you look at that! "Don't be selfish!" Heh, that's a good one. Well, we're out of time for today, kids. Remember, God--
[he and Larry enters] Hold it, hold it! Stop, stop, stop! You can't end a show like that! Well, it's way too short, and the story was kinda, well... I don't know. QWERTY's off, and there's not even a verse! No, no! This is all wrong, we gotta do it again! [hops over closer to the screen and faces the audience] My apologies, boys and girls. We're gonna give this another go around. [to Jimmy and Jerry] Jimmy! Jerry! Take off those ridiculous costumes, we got a real story to tell! [Jimmy and Jerry leaves the countertop, disappointed] Larry, do you remember that letter we got from Lucy Thomas of Bismarck, North Dakota?
Uh, yeah. The one where she said she didn't like to play with her sister because she wanted to keep all her toys to herself?
That's the one. I'd say it's time we taught little Lucy a thing or two about being selfish. What do you say?
I say, aye-aye, skipper! [hops off]
[sighs in relief] It's good to be back. Action!
What's that?
MMelvin (Pa Grape)
Its a flannelgraph, to illustrate.
GLGeorge and Louis (Bob)
Ooh! Flannelgraph!
[Haman (Mr. Lunt) wakes up Queen Vashti in the middle of the night.]
QVQueen Vashti
Oh... Who is it?
Um... Uh, Your Highness, ah... The king was wondering if you could make him a sandwich.
QVQueen Vashti
It's three o'clock in the morning.
Ah... Yeah. But, uh, he says that he's the king, and whatever he says goes.
QVQueen Vashti
Well, I'm the queen, and the king can make his own sandwich.
Okay.
[Haman throws Queen Vashti out of the castle.]
QVQueen Vashti
[angrily] You can't do this to me! I'm the queen!
Oh, yeah? [throws her luggage at her] The king can do whatever he wants! He's the king! And don't come back!
KXKing Xerxes (Mr. Nezzer)
Don't you think that might have been a little harsh?
Oh, no way. If she got away with that, no one would listen to you.
Well, what am I gonna do now?
It looks like we're going to have to find you a new queen.
Hmm... Make me a sandwich.
You know, we both work for the king, but compared to me, you are a g-nat.
MMordecai (Pa Grape)
It's a "G". Silent. It's "nat".
Are you calling me a g-nat?!
No. Just correctin' your pronunciation.
ARE YOU CALLING ME STUPID?!
Uh, no?
You get in the wagon! You, bow to me!
MMordecai (Pa Grape)
Uh, no!
Bow!
No!
BOW!
I bow to no one except my God and my king!
[after the cake gets smashed by a falling piano] Why is there a piano on my cake?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's VeggieTales pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.