Wilhelmina [to Marc]: Who do you think denied you a raise for the past two years? Cut your vacation time? Who do you think hacked into your computer and canceled your subscription to DudeCruise?
S1 E21Secretaries' Day
Sure, today I'm the eye candy, but tomorrow I'll be old candy. Old, hard, wrinkly candy, covered in lint.
Are you having a stroke?
Maybe. I'm old enough!
Oh it's about to get nerd-nasty.
S1 E22A Tree Grows in Guadalajara
We get to meet all of our family members and practice our Spanish. Hola comi a tu sobrina.
You just said "I ate your niece."
She swam the English Channel in a leather bikini. We already have the title: The Daredevil Wears Prada.
Doesn't anyone care that I am understudying the lead in West Side Story? God forbid Joey Colano takes ill and I don't know my finger snaps for the rumble.
Your boyfriend fakes his death and comes back as a very big girl. There really isn't a card for that.
Yesterday you told me my head was too big for my neck.
That was constructive criticism.
Well, what am I supposed to do about it?
I don't know. As a friend, my job is only to point things out.
S1 E23East Side Story
[Betty brings Daniel a rock from Mexico.]
It's supposed to be mystical. The old man who sold it to me said it would help you on your journey to enlightenment. Or with cramps. My Spanish really sucks.
Fabia? That little Euro-Wench is getting married?
And she got Elton John to sing for the wedding. He's re-written "Candle In the Wind" just for her.
What? He was re-writing "Candle in the Wind" for me!
Ugh. Give that queen twenty-bucks and she'll re-write it for anybody.
Get Fabia over here. Wedding Summit '07 is on!
FFabia
You must come to the ceremony. I won't be able to get married without my "something old."
Oh, with the veins in your legs, you already have your "something blue."
DDiane
Oh, my God! That is so romantic. It's like Julia Roberts flossing before whoring herself in "Pretty Woman."
Back in Scotland I have a husband.
Ooh, you just got 10% more interesting.
He's an insurance auditor.
Okay, 5%.
S2 E1"How Betty Got Her Grieve Back"
[At a natural disasters shoot.]
There is no one here who cares about changing the inside. They only care about fixing the outside.
What's stumpy up to now?
This concealer here, this isn't gonna change the fact that she doesn't have a house. And this, this eyeliner isn't going to bring back the people you loved. These women have lost everything and there is not enough styling gel in here to change that! [walks off]
SSheila
You know what, she's right. There's not enough styling gel.
Hey, what's different about you? You get your hair cut?
I'm wearing an eyepatch.
You didn't always have that?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Ugly Betty pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.