Pete quotes from Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place

Pete

Today I almost died.

Ashley

Underachiever.

Ashley

Why don't you tell me what the surprise is just to make sure I'm not disappointed.

Pete

You know I'm suddenly amazed you were asked out in college.

Ashley

I had a great time today. I'd never heckled Shakespeare in the park before.

Pete

Well you stole the show with, "Get a day job thou bloweth."

Ashley

We've got three days, strictly fun, no emotional attatchments. Just think of me as a soldier on a weekend pass.

Pete

OK but if you knock me up, you have to take me back to your country.

Ashley

I wasn't exactly popular in high school.

Pete

Really?

Ashley

People said I had a superior attitude but that's just probably because they were all so stupid.

Ashley

I never knew you'd be such a good lover.

Pete

Yeah and imagine me with a good partner.

Ashley

Well until recently I couldn't imagine you with a non-plastic partner.

Berg

Pete I need a favour.

Pete

Sure.

Berg

Can you ask Irene for a cup of urine?

Pete

Why, are we out?

Johnny

Oh, so Ashley told you she forgot to take her pill.

Pete

What?!

Johnny

Easy! She isn’t pregnant.

Pete

How do you know?

Johnny

She says she doesn’t want to be.