So what do I owe you?
Well, I get $200 an hour, you were here for five minutes, so why don't we just round it off and say $200?
Charlie [sighs]: Man. Even hookers prorate.
Hookers don't have to listen to you, Charlie. Good-bye.
Why aren't you studying for your algebra final?
'Cause I don't have to.
You don't have to study algebra.
Nope. All I gotta do is get a 67 to pass the course, and then it's adiós seventh grade, arrivederci eighth.
OK, we can cross "UN interpreter" off the job list...
We're at the same theater! What a happy coincidence!
Yeah, just like Booth and Lincoln.
What's bugging you, Zippy? Your blow-up doll run off with a pool toy?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Two and a Half Men pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.