“Bart of Darkness” · Season 6
In this episode: Homer Simpson (4), Bart Simpson (4), Marge Simpson (1), Ned Flanders (1), Milhouse Van Houten (1), Nelson Muntz (1), Chief Wiggum (1), Julius Hibbert (1)
Hey Bart, your epidermis is showing!
It is? [Bart looks in vain for the problem, only to overbalance and fall from the treehouse, then screams with a girlish scream]
[talking to Kearney as Bart plummets] You see, "epidermis" means your hair. [Bart lands with a thud] So technically it's true; that's what makes it so funny. Pardon me a moment. Ha ha!
Hey Nelson, he's really hurt. I think he broke his leg.
I said, "Ha, ha."
I'm sorry, that leg's going to have to come off. [Homer and Bart gasps] Ha, ha, ha. Did I say "leg"? I meant that wet bathing suit. I'm afraid you'll need a cast on that broken bone.
Aw, I'm going to miss the whole summer.
Don't worry, boy. When you get a job like me, you'll miss every summer.
This was a lovely idea, Homie. Come here and kiss me.
Mmm... Uh-h-h-- [a rotor system is heard and a spotlight interrupts]
[scream]
[through a megaphone] Do not be alarmed. Continue swimming naked. Aw, come on! Continue! C'mon! Aww... [to Lou] All right, Lou, open fire.
[After hearing a woman scream from inside Flanders' house, Bart looks outside and sees him digging a hole in his yard]
This can't be what it looks like. There's gotta be some other explanation.
I wish there was some other explanation for this. But there isn't. I'm a murderer, I'm a murderer!
Then that's not the real Ned Flanders.
I'M A MUR-DIDDLY-URDLER!
If that's not Flanders, he's done his homework.
[after they build a barn from a pool kit] Alright, everybody in the pool!
'Tis a fine barn, but sure 'tis no pool, English.
D'oh-eth!
Well, I guess that explains everything.
Not everything. [talking to Ned] There's still the little matter of the whereabouts of your wife.
Uh, I'm right here.
Oh, I see. Then I guess everything's wrapped up in a neat little package!
[Everybody looks at him]
Really, I mean that. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Simpsons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
