Fran Fine quotes from The Nanny

Maggie

Fran, I'm 20 years old. Doesn't Dad know that... you know... I'm active?

Fran

You doing the bing bing? I love that you feel so comfortable that you want to be totally honest with me so let me be totally honest with you... Get upstairs!! What are you, crazy?! You're never leaving my house again!!

Sweetheart Sara's parents are going to be here any minute.

Fran

All right what are you so nervous about, I thought you said they were thrilled when you told them we got married.

Well darling I lied

Fran

What do you mean you didn't tell them. Are you ashamed of me? am i embarrassing to you? Why aren't you answering?

Sweetheart your very special, your...your an acquired taste like feta cheese.

Fran

Your comparing me to smelly Greek Cheese?

Sweetheart these are Sara's parents this is a very sensitive situation for them, I mean in their minds you are in fact replacing their daughter so I want to break It to them gently.

Fran

Who compares a wife to cheese?

Oh forget the cheese your not a cheese your a beautiful, vibrant, sexy, charming woman. Now their gonna be here any minute and i want you to make a good impression so please get out of that robe.

Fran

all right (opens robe, but realizes she's naked and Max and Sara's parents see it). what do you think they'll think of this?

(seeing his wife Fran naked) I don't know why don't you ask them (he points towards the door)

Fran

How could they be contesting the adoption? On what grounds?

They think you're an unfit mother.

Fran

Unfit?! I'm in the best shape of my life. I know what this is all about. They don't like my people.

No, sweetheart, they're not anti-Semitic. They're best friends with the Rothchilds.

Fran

I meant my mother.

Darling, Darling i know all about your past. before I hired you I had you thoroughly investigated

Fran

What?

Yea I'm not about to trust some stranger with my children am I?

Fran

(In a sexy voice) oh I checked you out

You have absolutely nothing to confess. I know everything about you.

Fran

Everything? Even my age?

Actually, that was the one thing even the FBI couldn't verify. The closest they could get was 31.

Fran

31?.... [Happily] Well, I guess the truth is out.

Maggie

Because of your support, Michael and I have decided to move in together.

Fran

Honey, that's fantastic! Are you gonna be needing a nanny? Because I'm gonna be available.

What the hell do you think you were doing?!

Fran

Well, I think it's pretty—

I know what they were doing! I wanna know why they were doing it!

Fran

Well, I think—

I know why they were doing it!

Fran

It's going to pretty difficult for me to tell her she can't do something that well I recently discovered that is is (in a sexy voice) just so amazing.

I don't care, (he then realizes the nice comment about his love making) Thank You (to Fran with a smile on his face)

Fran

[Reading a pregnancy test manual] It says: "If you're not pregnant, it'll turn pink. If you are pregnant, it will turn blue." As will we all. Oh, honey, this wouldn't have happened if you had just listened to me.

Maggie

Fran, you said I could do whatever I want in my own house.

Fran

WHATever, not WHOever!

Maggie

Fran, I'm so nervous.

Fran

Sweetie, listen, whatever happens, don't worry. You won't have to go through this by yourself.

Maggie

I'm so glad I have you.

Fran

I love you. [Hugs] I don't want to put pressure on you or anything but if for some reason you are pregnant, life is gonna change forever. No husband, no house, no money... and it ain't gonna be a picnic for you either.

Darling what's all this in the middle of the afternoon. Wine, Candles, a sexy negligee. you were expecting me weren't you

Fran

Well funny you should use the word expecting

oh Sweetheart i'm so sorry about what i said

Fran

Oh Sweetie you can't blame yourself that the way you feel. you don't want to have a baby now i can understand that

Well that was before i knew we were having one, Hey i didn't know i wanted another wife until i met you.

Excuse me, what are you doing?

Fran

Oh, Miss Whoopi Goldberg! I'm so sorry, I just... I have to have sex right now!

Now, usually they ask for my autograph.

Fran

You know this has always been a fantasy of mine.

What to um make love in the snow?

Fran

No to make love to my ski instructor.

Fran

[About her cold] My ears are so blocked I can't even hear myself.

Niles

Lucky you.

Fran

This is my first Thanksgiving where I'm eating for two.

Niles

You know, Sylvia, if you stop now, you can say the same.

Sylvia

Niles, get my coat! I'm going home!

Fran

Another miracle!