Hey, I made a giant pizza. Let's eat. [screams terrifyingly when the pizza pops up from the box and hovers]
JJimmy
The Slumbertron must've combined the pizza and scary story programs to create…
JJimmy
I can't delete the pizza! The screen's frozen!
PMPizza Monster
Time for my dinner!
[The boys run away, screaming]
HELP! WE'RE BEING CHASED BY A MONSTER!
Tell those boys to go to sleep now!
Oh, Booger Sugar. They're just playing Help; I'm Being Chased by a Monster.
PMPizza Monster
Well, my tasty morsels, the tables are turned. Now it looks like I get to eat YOU!
JJimmy
Let's split up. Whoever the Pizza Monster isn't chasing can go for help. 1, 2, 3. [Carl and Sheen accidentally bump into both sides of him] GO!
[The three boys run away, splitting up into different directions and the Pizza Monster splits into three, laughing evilly and chase after them]
JJimmy
Mission accomplished.
If only it used its anchovies for good instead of evil.
PMPizza Monster
Fools! Haven't you ever heard of sequels?
JJimmy
[after a nightmare] Oh, it was only a nightmare. An anchovy, clam and peanut butter induced nightmare. [sees his parents running down the stairs until Hugh wakes up screaming]
[After Carl wakes up from a nightmare screaming from mutant pizza]
Bad dream! Bad dream! [sees Sheen getting attacked by Pizza Monster]
[screams] Phew. I guess it was all just a dream. Hey Carl, I- [But Carl is nowhere to be seen. He picks up Pizza Monster in two hands, making the Pizza Monster terrified.]
[After the Pizza Monster wakes up from a nightmare screaming.]
PMPizza Monster's Wife
Honey, what is it?
PMPizza Monster
Oh, I had the most horrible dream. There were 3 terrible children, a tubby one, a maniac one and one with a giant head!
PMPizza Monster's Wife
I told you, dear. There's no such thing as children, now go back to sleep.
[Both go back to sleep in their pizza box beds.]
JJimmy
I have to bring back the old Dad, and I've gotta do it fast!
Oh, is that what that is? [snorts] I thought it might be the cheese ball I've been carrying around since I was 3. [He shows a rotten cheese ball.] I call him Cheesy.
[Jimmy makes a face, then begins thinking.]
JJimmy
Think, think, think…!
[A memory of Hugh catching Jimmy is shown.]
Told ya. [Eats Carl's cheese ball]
How could you misread your own readings?
Yeah, Neutron. I'll bet there are more rocks in your big head than there are in this stupid asteroid. What are we supposed to do now?
JJimmy
I don't know. We could spend years searching the rest of the belt. We'd just be wasting our time.
Hey, look on the bright side, guys. At least we still have our health. [bites his burrito hard; painfully] Ow! Carl, what did you put in this burrito?!
Nothing. Just some rice from the galley and some beans I found growing in the ground.
[Sheen reaches inside his mouth and pulls out a tooth]
I'll give you three seconds to get away from my ruby stash!
What are you talking about? I was just going to the little miner's rooms.
Like you had no idea these were here.
Hey, sweet hiding place. My rubies are over there by that strange rock formation. You made me tell! You want my rubies you jewel thief?!
Ruby madness! Ruby madness!
Will you stop shouting that?!
He tried to raid my ruby stash!
[scoffs] You told me your stash was by the rocket. You lied!
So what?! I happened to know you lied about your hiding place!
LSLibby, Sheen, and Cindy
BE QUIET!
JJimmy
What's wrong with you guys?! You've been fighting ever since we got rid of those stupid bandits. Are we gonna let a few priceless gems turns us into savages?
You made smoothie come out our noses!
JJimmy
Sorry, ladies, but I needed test subjects for my new Quantum Replay 9000. Observe what happens when I press "rewind." [presses a button, rewinding the girls]
CLCindy & Libby
[disgusted] Ew!
JJimmy
And now "fast-forward." [fast-forwards the girls]
JJimmy
Notice how it only affects the objects you point at, thus preserving the integrity of the space-time continuum.
[rewinding and fast-forwarding the girls] Ooh! It makes everything all time-loopy.
JJimmy
Might I suggest the frame-by-frame function? [presses a button, fast-forwarding the girls in slow-motion]
Oh, I could do this for hours!
Mr. Neutron, please! You're giving us massive brain freeze!
JJimmy
Watch out for its retractable claws… unless it spits venom, then watch out for having your eyes dissolved.
Wha - how can I watch if my eyes are dissolved?
No, watch before they're dissolved!
Watch my eyes? That doesn't make any sense.
JJimmy
What a relief. All the changes we made don't seem to have altered the timeline. [enters the house] Mom, Dad, I'm back! [sees Hugh being put in a cage by Judy as punishment] Oh, no! We did alter the timeline! We created a world where human males are slaves to a race of female warriors!
Oh, no! [he and Carl run out of the house to Cindy and Libby]
Have mercy, mighty overlords.
Spare us and we shall serve you well!
[Cindy and Libby look at each other, baffled]
Sweetie, relax. I just put your father in there to keep him from annoying the townspeople. [to Hugh; sternly] Now, you were saying, Hugh?
[remorsefully] I'm sorry, honey. [Judy rewinds him with the Quantum Replay] I'm sorry, honey. [Judy rewinds him again] I'm sorry, honey.
[The device lands in Leppy's hands, and he points it at the viewers, rewinding the entire episode back to the beginning]
JJimmy
[surprised] Not again.
[Episode starts in Jimmy's lab; Jimmy is trying out his new invention, the Electro-Life to resurrect Carl's deceased, beloved goldfish, Swimmy]
JJimmy
Live. Live. Live! Oh, sorry, Carl. I couldn't bring your goldfish back to life.
[sniffles sadly; grieving] Goodbye, Swimmy. I'll miss you, boy.
Why must the good die young?!
JJimmy
Now I thought re-stimulating his brain waves with my new Electro-Life device would bring him back. But I guess not.
Jimmy, we might have a pop quiz today. Can I stimulate my brain?
[At Lindbergh Elementary School… Miss Fowl is holding a VHS tape box of Ken Burns' History of Mummies documentary which Carl screams in terror at the picture of a mummy]
Today, we will watch part one of Ken Burns' 97-hour documentary on the history of mummies.
Yawn. I'd rather chew off my own foot.
[whispering] No, I wanna check this out. My family tree goes back to Egypt. Mummies are cool.
[inserts the tape in the VCR] Butch, would you get the lights?
Sure thing, teach. [pulls out a slingshot and shatters the lights off]
[annoyed with hand in face] Thank you.
JJimmy
I don't wanna see videos of mummies. I wanna see real mummies!
Oh, I don't. They might rise from the dead and attack us!
[Miss Fowl presses a button on the remote, turning on the TV; As the documentary starts, she and all the other students (minus Jimmy and Cindy) immediately fall asleep]
NNarrator
"Dear Ahmadiyya, today I moved a one-ton boulder across the broiling desert sands. Then I had lunch. Then they cut my tongue out."
JJimmy
[gazes at a drawing of Egypt] What am I doing sitting here? I'm a science genius. [turns around to his friends] Who's up for a quick trip to Egypt?
What could be more boring than going with you to Egypt?
NNarrator
"Tonight, it is my turn to tell stories around the fire. This will be difficult without my tongue."
[makes up her mind] Let's roll.
[The kids all tip-toe quietly out of the classroom and into the hallway]
JJimmy
[quietly] I'll go home and get my hover car and meet you guys in back of the school. [runs off]
But, what if we get caught?
We're not gonna get caught.
The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius · 473 quotes
