[At Lindbergh Elementary School… Miss Fowl is holding a VHS tape box of Ken Burns' History of Mummies documentary which Carl screams in terror at the picture of a mummy]
Today, we will watch part one of Ken Burns' 97-hour documentary on the history of mummies.
Yawn. I'd rather chew off my own foot.
[whispering] No, I wanna check this out. My family tree goes back to Egypt. Mummies are cool.
[inserts the tape in the VCR] Butch, would you get the lights?
Sure thing, teach. [pulls out a slingshot and shatters the lights off]
[annoyed with hand in face] Thank you.
I don't wanna see videos of mummies. I wanna see real mummies!
Oh, I don't. They might rise from the dead and attack us!
[Miss Fowl presses a button on the remote, turning on the TV; As the documentary starts, she and all the other students (minus Jimmy and Cindy) immediately fall asleep]
"Dear Ahmadiyya, today I moved a one-ton boulder across the broiling desert sands. Then I had lunch. Then they cut my tongue out."
[gazes at a drawing of Egypt] What am I doing sitting here? I'm a science genius. [turns around to his friends] Who's up for a quick trip to Egypt?
What could be more boring than going with you to Egypt?
"Tonight, it is my turn to tell stories around the fire. This will be difficult without my tongue."
[makes up her mind] Let's roll.
[The kids all tip-toe quietly out of the classroom and into the hallway]
[quietly] I'll go home and get my hover car and meet you guys in back of the school. [runs off]
But, what if we get caught?
We're not gonna get caught.
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