Jesse Ventura quotes from Survivor Series

[Mr. Fuji is up on the apron.] Nice clothesline by Smash as Ax tells him "Put him away!"

Whoa! Did you see that, Gorilla? Fuji was hanging on to the rope!

Fuji pulled that rope open. I don't know, inadvertently or not. Maybe he just lost his balance, Jess.

No! I distinctly saw Fuji open the ropes and Smash went through them.

And he got counted out!

Demolition has been counted out!

[Ax starts arguing with Fuji] Look at Ax call on Fuji now! Questioning Fuji about pulling that rope down! What is this?!

I don't care! I'm the boss! And I did not pull the rope down!

Fuji saying "I'm the boss!"

Ooh, Fuji hit him with the cane! Did you see that, Gorilla?

Look at that, rides him again with it.

It's not having any effect. [Fuji whacks Ax from behind with his cane]

Absolutely not. From behind, he nails him again with it! [Smash throws Fuji into Ax who slams him on the floor] He forgot about Smash! Oh, slamming Fuji on the canvas, on the concrete!

All I can say, Gorilla, is we've definitely had a major falling out, happened here tonight.

History is being made right here at Survivor Series, as Mr. Fuji and Demolition obviously have parted company.

Wait a minute. What have we got going on now?

Match continues on. Look at this! Why are they helping Fuji?

I tell you, Gorilla, there's more to this than meets the eye, I think.

Something stinks here.

And it definitely ain't Cleveland.

Did you notice Koko's new look? He's got the James Brown hairstyle.

I saw that.

Fried, dyed, and layin' to the side.

I've noticed you're wearing shades now, Gorilla, is that because you want to be like me?

No, it's because I want to see.

Oh look at that!

Did Macho trip? What happened?

Slickster from the outside tripped up the Macho Man with his cane.

Now how can you be so sure?

I saw it!

You saw it? Through those bifocals you could see it?

We're underway, as the 4x4s have cleared the ring.

What do you expect? They run in the ring with boards.

No, they're 4x4s.

Yeah, boards, that's what I said.

No they're only two-by-fours.

Well, the Macho King, he had a scepter out there. He had a weapon, didn't he?

Come on, Monsoon, get serious for a change, will you? Do you condone for a minute them being allowed to bring boards in the ring with them?

That's just a symbol of their team.

Yeah.

You don't see them out there now, do you?

I got a bridge, Monsoon, that's for sale. You interested?

Now do you condone that, Gorilla?

Absolutely. After what they did? Yes!

You condone him coming in from behind...

Are you deaf, I said yes!

[cont'd] and hitting somebody with a foreign object. You're despicable, Gorilla!

Look at the big Z on the side of his head there. What's that, in case he gets lost or something?

No, it means Zeus, Gorilla. You know Zeus starts with Z.

Oh I understand that.

Then what'd you ask for?

See if you were paying attention, Jess.

[as Hogan and Demolition triple-team DiBiase] Now what do you call this, Monsoon?

It's called survival.

Oh, it's "survival" when your favorites do it; it's cheating when the other team does it.

I didn't say that.

Yes you did. Look at this, triple-teaming in the center of the ring. Now why won't the referee disqualify them?

It's the referee's prerogative.

Yeah, a little biased, if you ask me, Gorilla. I mean, he fires Zeus out of here right at the getgo and he's letting the Hulkamaniacs get away with murder.

Did Zeus not knock the referee down twice, Jess? You can't put your hands on the referee. I don't care whether you've got a Z on the side of your head or not, that's not legal. That'll cost you the match. And I don't know. If Zeus was still out there, I'd have my doubts.

Well if Zeus was still out there, Hogan wouldn't be.

He (Ted DiBiase) spat at him!(Hulk Hogan)

Spat at who?

At the champ. Well, what are you watching?! Aren't you paying attention?!

I'm watching knee drops right into the back. I'm not looking at where spit and sweat is flying.

Well pay attention!

How can you see spit and sweat fly when there's knees and elbows?

I might want to ask you a question later.

The Powers of Pain are big and they are strong and they know how to double-team.

There's evidence of it right there.

The Warlord caught Hogan. Hogan stumbling to the wrong corner, Gorilla.

Yeah, but where was the tag, Jess?

There wasn't one.

Oh, double clothesline by the champ. And the Powers of Pain are down. And Fuji's upset.

DiBiase and Roberts outside the ring. Hogan is getting double-teamed unmercifully here. Oh! Spike Piledriver...it's over!

Oh, Spike Piledriver nails the champ.

Hogan ain't gonna get up--

(in background) The Powers of Pain, have been disqualified

Oh, the referee saw that...he's disqualifying someone.

WHAT?! I can't believe it! He's saving Hogan again?! Not once! No, twice Hogan's gonna get saved in this match!

Referee may have just disqualified both members of the Powers of Pain.

Aw...this makes me sick, Monsoon! He disqualifies Zeus 'cause he beats up Hogan, now they disqualify the Powers of Pain because they beat up Hogan too!

No, He disqualified Zeus because Zeus manhandled the referee, and these two guys got caught in a deliberate double-team effort.

[on the Bushwhackers] A lot of bushwhacking going on here in the Rosemont Horizon.

What do you expect, Gorilla? It's Chicago. These guys are probably half normal in Chicago on Halsted Street.

And look at this, Neidhart's getting beat up in the corner already. This thing's going wild.

And look at The Anvil unloading on The Brain.

The bell hasn't even rung yet. And look at Andre...

We don't have all the team members out there yet!

Yeah, but the big man, Andre the Giant is gonna eliminate The Anvil before the bell even sounds.

I believe the referee has called for the bell. And there's the Warrior.

There's the bell. There's the bell.

Warrior with a clothesline. Warrior just... He's knocked Andre silly! The match is official, it's underway, and Andre's down and out. How are they gonna pick him up?

Well the problem is, the bell rang with Andre in the ring. Andre's gotta get back in the the ring before a ten-count. The referee's counted...

Andre the Giant has been counted out.

Andre's gone.

Wow! What a blow to The Heenan Family.

Did you see the look on Arn Anderson's face? He can't believe it.

As the chant goes out by this capacity crowd: "Weasel!" Listen to them, I told you they all know his name.

Yeah, and I know that you instigated it, Monsoon. You sit down and quit waving at 'em to start that up! Pay attention to your job instead of picking sides!

[as Haku tags Bobby Heenan] And here comes Heenan.

Yeah sure.

There you go.

Yeah, he wants in when somebody's in trouble. [Heenan kicks Marty Jannetty before getting punched in the gut and quickly tags Arn Anderson] Oh, did you see that?! Give me a break.

Hey he got in, did the damage, and got out.

Did what damage?

Kicked him in the guts.

Please.

Look at the Warrior just waiting for the right opportunity. Uh-oh... [Camera pans to Heenan looking terrified] Look at that look. That's worth a thousand words.

You're loving this ain't you, Monsoon?

I am.

You're just eating this up, aren't you?

I am.

The Warrior can beat up a manager.

You said he was a intricate part of this team. Now he can show me that he is.