Chad quotes from Sonny With a Chance

Sonny

(sarcastically laughs) Story's not funny yet. Exactly what dates put you in harm's way?

Chad

(thinks back)

Sonny

Wait, that wasn't you?

Chad

There were pointy things involved. Harm's way.

Sonny

What else?

Sonny

(mad and hands on her hips) Seriously?

Chad

Hot liquid, Sonny. Classic harm's way.

Sonny

You done?

Chad

Uhh...

(wearing sombreros, staring at each other at a Mexican restaurant)

Chad

Happy one week anniversary, my senorita.

Sonny

And they said we wouldn't last.

(grabs their tacos and clang them together) Ole!

Sonny

(sad) Our anniversary?

Chad

You know Mexican food makes me gassy, and that would put you in harm's way. See? I'm just looking out for you.

Sonny

No, you weren't. A stunt double? Really? I mean, I just...I can't-

Chad

Spit it out, Sonny.

Sonny

We're over.

Chad

Spit it back in. Spit it back in.

Sonny

No, you know what? We're done. Our whole relationship has been a lie.

Chad

No it hasn't. I just couldn't risk getting hurt.

Sonny

So instead you hurt me. (leaves)

Chad

Cut! Take five! Milady on the set! (throws a imaginary lasso at Sonny and pulls the lasso)

Sonny

(not moving)

Chad

(still pulling the lasso)

Sonny

(shakes her head) Really? Sonny it up?

Chad

(wrapping the lasso) Yeah, that's the word you use when meddling just won't do.

Sonny

(throws the imaginary lasso down) Put that down.

Chad

(moves the lasso away)

Chad

(talking about Wesley) I'm so proud of him.

Sonny

What about me?

Chad

Oh, you're totally going to Sonny it up.

Chad

I was gonna send you a cheese basket. (looks at the cheese basket again) Wait, I was gonna send you that cheese basket. Wesley, you mini-Macking on my girlfriend?

I'm sorry you had to find out this way, Big Mac. But there's always someone younger and prettier.

Chad

(laughs) It's true. Got some bad news for you though. (puts his arm around Sonny) Sonny would never date an out of work actor.

I'm not an out of work actor.

Chad

You are now. Security! (security carries Wesley away)

Hey! No! No! You'll hear from my agent!

Chad

Peace out lil' sucker! See? Big Mack' got your back. (winks)

Sonny

Gosh, I feel terrible. If I hadn't meddled he'd still have a job and Zora wouldn't be out to get me.

Sonny

(screams) That sandbag has revenge written all over it! (runs away)

Chad

That's what you get when you Sonny it up!

Sonny

(stands up) Oh come on people! Do you really think this is where we're going to have our first kiss? Especially since he has stinky mustard breath?

Chad

Yeah! Hey what?

Sonny

Oh well... Maybe I should date Efron then...

Chad

Do not even joke about that!

Sonny

(wearing funny glasses) Okay great first day of camp guys. Now remember pies are for eating not throwing. (ducks down after a pie is thrown at her) I know what cabin you sleep in Brian! (closes the door then her cellphone rings and she takes off the glasses) Hello?

Chad

What?

Sonny

Hello?

Chad

Sonny? Sonny? I can't hear you. Hold on, I'll try to move around, find a good spot.

Sonny

Chad? Hey I can't hear you either. The reception's horrible.

Chad

(moving around) Thank you, you're adorable too. I gave my list to Mr. Condor.

Sonny

No I didn't see a condor, but I think I saw a eagle.

Chad

No! No, no, no. Everything I'm asking for is legal!

Sonny

Okay, I'm not sure what you're asking but my advice is don't be greedy.

Chad

That is great advice! I will be greedy!

Sonny

No! Why would you beat Grady? (door knocks and Sonny opens it) Brian put that pie down. (ducks again) I gotta go. (hangs up)

Chad

(running) You'll never replace me!

I'm the new Mackenzie!

Grady

You're the new Mackenzie?

I'm the new Mackenzie!

Chad

(being carried by security guards) You're the new Mackenzie?

I am the new Mackenzie! Delta Nu!

And the Choicey goes to...

Mac...aroni and cheese, it's So Random!

Tawni

Well, well, well. Oh gosh, I have something that I've been waiting to say for five years! To my friends at Mackenzie Falls-

Sonny

High road.

Tawni

To my friends at Mackenzie Falls-

Sonny

(interrupts Tawni) IN YOUR FACE MACKENZIE FALLS! YEAH! OH YEAH! IN YOUR FACE! WE WON AND YOU THOUGHT WE'D LOSE! BUT GUESS WHAT? WE WON! WHOO! (calms down) Uh, what I meant to say was...thank you.

Chad

(shocked and frowning)