Officer Tony quotes from Shameless

Officer Tony

You can't file a missing persons report on Frank.

Fiona

Why not? Frank's always missing.

Officer Tony

That's what I said. I mean, he's probably just sleeping it off at a friend's place.

Fiona

He hasn't got any friends. Who'd give him a bed? Come on, we've found him in dumpsters, garbage trucks, Mrs. Lutski's bathtub. Never on the last Friday of the month.

Officer Tony

What's Friday have to do with anything?

Fiona

It's the last Friday?

Officer Tony

I'll call my watch commander.

Officer Tony

[Bullhorn] We're looking for a missing boy named Casey. Last seen wearing a Superman costume. Two years old. Any information would be greatly appreciated. No questions asked.

Why the fuck wouldn't we ask questions?

Officer Tony

Because we want people to feel safe.

How do you find out what happened if you don't ask questions? You understand the premise, right?

Officer Tony

People feel safe, they give information, we find the kid.

Safe, my ass. I'm asking questions. Okay, yeah. I'm gonna ask fucking questions.

Officer Tony

That's what you do. Go ahead. Yeah, sure. You do what you want to do. [Bullhorn] Casey Casden, last seen wearing a Superman costume.

You satisfied?

Officer Tony

I just can't believe it.

Hey, you win some, you lose some.

Officer Tony

What does she see in him?

Ass, gas and cash. Did you see his Porsche?

Officer Tony

Fiona's not like that.

Face it, women think with their vaginas.