RO quotes from Sea Patrol

Oh oh oooooo ooh wow wooow!

Charge

Oh recording recording!

Nav

Spider hasn't got a chance against her.

RO

Guys, some of us are trying to work here.

Nav

RO, shoosh.

Kate

Ahh, have we found something of interest on the EOD?

Charge

No, just perving on the cruiser.

Kate

What's Webb done with his life jacket?

Charge

Ummm well he.....

Nav

You know Spider, he's just...Spider.

Kate

Right

Bomber

He’s supposed to be a hell of a captain.

RO

Yeah. He’s a golf nut.

ET

I hear golf balls aren’t the only thing he whacks with his putter... Junior sailors

Bomber

No!

ET

Oh, I’m serious.

Kate

Where is Spider?

RO

He's down the back trying to break the language barrier with the boy ma'am.

Kate

Ah, how's he going?

RO

Well I wouldn't want him on my team for pictionary.

I thought you two would have something in common!

RO

Yeah, a certain part of our anatomy!

RO

I ran that check that you requested on the MV Trader Star, the vessel you just boarded.

Mike

Not now RO.

RO

I really think you should look at the piece of paper I just handed you, Sir.

Charge

Ah, salmon vol a vaunts, number five on my list of all time favourite horses doovers.

RO

Fascinating. What’s your number one?

Charge

Pig in a blanket.

RO

Does anybody... oh, sorry. Can anyone tell me where the gents is?

Swain

Bathroom.

Charge

How many of those have you had?

RO

Two? Three? I just, um... they’re very nice.

Swain

Ah, no, mate, I haven’t spotted the head yet. Might want to try downstairs, though.

RO

Thank you.

Swain

Ah, Robert?

RO

Mmm?

Swain

Stay away from golf buggies.

Charge

And the transsexuals.

Bird

I flop.

You mean you fold.

RO

:[To Bomber.] I just spat on you!

Bird

Whatever, I don’t get this game.

Bomber

:[To RO.] That’s disgusting!

What would you prefer to play, Bird? Go Fish?

Bird

Hey, don’t knock it, I’m actually pretty good at that one.

RO

He wants you to cook it.

Don’t listen to him, he’s inhumane.

Swain

Well, six hours left, 2Dads. Time to spill your guts.

Bomber

Come on, 2Dads, tell us.

Bird

At least tell Bomber it wasn’t me.

Dutchy

Listen everyone, I think the right thing to do is whoever did it to fess up themselves.

Charge

That’s right.

RO

Oh, that went well.

RO

Hey Bomber. Bird tell you the news about Two Dads?

Bomber

Bird seems to know everything that’s going on on this boat.

RO

Yeah, she’s pretty popular with the crew. [Pause.] Do I detect a note of jealously there?

Bomber

Yeah, there’s a whole symphony going on.

RO

Come on, Bomber, don’t compare yourself with Bird. I mean, she’s a sweet young thing, but... well, you’re... you’re a woman. You’re a very attractive woman. You’re beautiful so... you’re our chefo as well so we couldn’t exist without you.

Bomber

Thanks, RO. [She kisses him on the cheek.]

RO

[Scoffs.] Children.

Bird

Robert, this is a family resort.

RO

Yeah, well, I was never allowed to behave like that when I was a child.

Dutchy

That explains a lot.

RO

You should have pointed your feet at his head.

Mike

Sorry, RO?

RO

Well, Thai’s believe that the head is holy, the feet unholy, the worst thing you can do is point your feet at their head.

Mike

[Exasperated.] Thanks for that, RO.

RO

[Sincerely.] You’re welcome, sir.

Charge

Feet?

RO

Yeah.

RO

Ah, Bomber, can I get some museli with some hot milk on the side please?

Bomber

Yeah sure. In a glass?

RO

In a glass would be fine. Could you make it really hot?

Bomber

Really hot it is.

RO

You're really hot.

Bomber

Excuse me {Walks toward Dutchy and kisses him on the cheek.]

Dutchy

Ah, what was that for?

Bomber

2Dads told me that you found me and carried me all that way. Thanks.

Dutchy

No, that wasn't me, that was RO. But thanks anyway.

RO

So.

Bomber

Why?

RO

You told me to stay away.

Bomber

Well, thanks for ignoring that.