Patient quotes from Scrubs

Elliot

[to a patient who's suing her] I know what your problem is; you blame your problems on everyone else. Well, you know what? If your job isn't challenging, you should get another career. If you have trouble with relationships, maybe it's because you have problems with commitment. I know, because I'm the same way; I blame my parents for spoiling me, I blame this place for taking up all my time... Well, no more. I'm going to grow up and start holding myself accountable.

Good for you.

Elliot

You're still suing me, aren't you?

Yes, but now I feel like you can handle it.

I was so obsessed with getting my J.D. that I never did the things I really wanted to do. Start a family. See the world.

Punch a whale.

Nah, I punched a whale. Right in the face. Down he went, like Liston.

Turk

Does heart trouble run in your family?

My uncle was shot in the heart.