Now let's see who this mysterious woman stealer really is.
(Velma unmasks Dandy Highwayman)
Like, seriously? But you're not even British.
SScooby
I'm so confused. Why?
LLibrarian
It's simple, really. You spend a life reading about other people's exciting adventures and never, never, never have one of your own. It's awful. (sadly) I'm so lonely.
Jinkies. How did I miss that one?
LLibrarian
I never really had any friends growing up. All I had were my books. For years I stayed in my room and read about incredible adventures, other people's adventures. Then, I got an idea, I was going to become the Dandy Highwayman. I was going to be the king of adventures and adored by women everywhere. I studied how to do an English accent. I incorporated a motorcycle helmet into my costume's hat and practiced my motorcycle skills for hours and hours. Then, I discovered something unimaginable: the key to a woman's total admiration and devotion. All you have to do is pay attention to them when they're talking. CRAZY, isn't it? It wasn't until I started to moderate the book club that I learned how to listen. From there, I actually became interested in what women have to say. Before long, I was fully engaged in their desires and feelings. I was living in the dream. And I would have gotten away with it, if it weren't for you meddling romance killers.
I'm not buying it for a second. You put some kind of voodoo MAGIC SPELL on them, you did.
LLibrarian
Never. I just listened, that's all. Except when the going got tough. I had a little help. (uncovers the earplugs) These earplugs were the only magic I used.
I knew it! I knew there was some kind of trick involved. Listening to women? Who ever heard of such a thing?!
(Mayor Nettles and Daphne arrive)
Jeepers! The librarian? I kind of feel bad for him. You know, he never really abducted the wives. They said they went with him willingly because he was mysteriously charming and--
We know, we know. The whole listening and paying attention thing. We get it already. Whatever.
(Sheriff Stone and deputy take the Librarian into custody)
(Scooby is in the strange dream)
Scooby-Doo, your time has come. She is here.
(Nova arrives)
I am not Nova. I've only borrowed her body so that I may bring you an urgent message. Scooby-Doo, your life is in danger.
I am of the Anunnaki, interdimensional beings that visit the planet earth every few thousand years. We arrive at a time call Nibiru, when the barriers between our worlds grow weak. The Anunnaki have a great history of helping humans, but we have no physical form and must inhabit animals. This is why some animals, our descendants, can talk and others cannot. But not all Anunnaki are kind and good. There are evil ones. And the most evil one of all is imprisoned beneath Crystal Cove and must not be set free. You must undo it, Scooby-Doo. Undo it all. Save yourself. Save your friends. Save the world.
(Scooby wakes up in the real world)
SScooby
Hmm? Hmm? Duh! The cursed treasure is evil. Evil! We have to destroy it!
(Velma, Fred, Daphne and Shaggy look at Scooby, a bit shocked)
Sorry to bother you so early, kids. But the neighbors have been calling in constantly with reports of unearthly moaning, inhuman howling, blood curling screams...
In other words, same old same old.
You can count on us, Mayor Nettles.
We'll see if there's anything mysterious going on here.
Come on, come on, let's go! Let's get this over with.
After we're finished here, we need to relocate the Planispheric Disk.
Good idea, Scoob. Yeah, you and I will re-hide the disc while you guys check out the scary house.
You're out of luck, Shaggy. Remember? Fred hid the Disk last time. And he's the only one who knows where it is.
Oy, can we hurry? Please?
Okay, let's get started. But first, well gang, it looks like we got another...
Mystery on our hands! Oh, Fred, we're such soul mates. We're finishing each other's sentences.
SVShaggy, Velma and Scooby
Split up and look for clues?
(The gang splits)
Like, I guess that means we're all soul mates, haha.
(In the present version of Crystal Cove)
EFEvil Fred
Does the dog need walking?
SScooby
I walk myself, Fred.
EFEvil Fred
(shows the Canine Grumpets) Perhaps you would enjoy a canine crumpet.
SScooby
Hmm. That is not a Scooby snack, Fred. Humph!
EFEvil Fred
What difference does it make? (Scooby is shocked) I'm sure they all taste the same.
SScooby
(grumbling) You eat them, then.
EFEvil Fred
What was that, Scoobert?
SScooby
Uh, nothing. Nothing.
(In the present version of Crystal Cove)
EFEvil Fred
Everybody out.
Like, this is more like it. (chuckles) The F-F-Fearatorium Food Emporium makes me, like, f-f-famished.
SScooby
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
EFEvil Fred
(grabs Shaggy and Scooby hardly) What's wrong with you two? You're like bottomless pits. We're not here to indulge your munchies. We're here for that Planispheric Disk.
Freddie, you're the one who hid it here. I don't understand why you don't know where it is.
EFEvil Fred
Oh, you don't understand? Intellect isn't your strong suit, huh? What about you? Got any smarts in there behind those eye goggles?
(In the present version of Crystal Cove)
EFEvil Fred
I don't know. Look in all the desks, I guess. I'll check out the superintendent's office. (leaves the gang)
Gang, something is definitely wrong here. (writes the blackboard with chalk) I mean, is it me or is Fred acting even stranger than usual?
SSScooby, Shaggy and Daphne
It's not you.
Maybe if we can retrace our steps, we'll see a pattern. (writing) F-F-Fearatorium Food Emporium. Arcane-A-Rama Movieplex. Kennel of the horrible hounds. Education board of Crystal Cove. (marks the first and second 4 letters from top to bottom)
And who sent the message?
My guess? The real Fred. Wherever he is, he's probably in life-threatening peril.
And in the clutches of some hideous creature.
(In Steelco Industries, the gang and Evil Fred arrived)
EFEvil Fred
Fan out. Search every inch of this place until we find that disk.
Well, like, if you remember hiding it here, like, dude, where is it?
EFEvil Fred
Well, the exact location slipped my mind. (leaves the gang to search the Planispheric Disk alone)
We can't let that fake Fred get his hands on the Planispheric Disk.
Like, we do what the real Fred would do. We trap him.
Agreed. But it's got to be before he gets his hands on...
EFEvil Fred
The Planispheric Disk. I found it! I found it!
Now that you've got it, what are you going to do with it? Fake Fred.
EFEvil Fred
Ahh, well done. You finally figured out I'm an imposter. So what? I'm taking the Planispheric Disk, and who's going to stop me? You? You?
NO! (arrives) Me. I mean you. Me. I mean me. You me. I-- Aw, heck. You get the idea. (starts fighting Evil Fred)
Don't just stand there, Shaggy. Get in there and help Fred.
(shows up) Be careful, Fred. Don't hurt him.
(Scooby, Shaggy, Velma and Daphne look at Old Daphne)
SScooby
(to Old Daphne) Daphne, you look terrible. You should get more sleep.
EFEvil Fred
Get me out of this. He's the fake.
They're, like, identical, right down to the ascot.
SScooby
Which one's the real Fred?
(to Evil Fred) Freddie, how do you feel about me?
EFEvil Fred
What do you mean? You're my love, Daphne. I'm crazy about you.
Uh, gosh. Gee, Daph, you know, I-- well, I guess aside from traps and solving mysteries, um... er, my stomach's getting hurty.
Oh, Freddie. It's you! (kisses Fred)
(Velma shuts down the magnetic machine, Evil Fred and Fred fall down to the floor)
EFEvil Fred
Well, if you're so smart, then who am I really?
You're one of the most heartless criminals Mystery Inc. has ever faced. Aren't you, dad? (tries to unmask Evil Fred but realizes it's not a mask)
EFEvil Fred/Brad
Ow! It's not a mask, you imbecile. I had plastic surgery to look like you. You would have spotted a mask too quickly.
I don't know what you think you were doing. You're supposed to be my father. But how could you try to impersonate me when you know absolutely nothing about me?
If he's Brad, that makes you Fred's sneaky criminal mom, Judy. (tries to unmask Old Daphne but realizes it's not a mask either)
ODOld Daphne/Judy
Ouch! Watch it. I had plastic surgery, too.
Brad Chiles and Judy Reeves? (chuckles) But, like, why?
For the treasure. What else? It was the genius mind of Professor Pericles that thought up the whole plan. Wasn't it, Judy?
That's right, Brad. While we went under the knife, Professor Pericles had Mr. E arrange for the Crystal Cove studio to be changed into an exact replica of the town.
Except more end of the world-ish, obviously.
I hate to be the one to point this out, but that's just crazy.
(shows up) Is it, Velma? Or is it so brilliant you cannot begin to fathom its true genius?
SSScooby, Shaggy, Daphne, Velma and Fred
Professor Pericles?
You failed, Professor. You'll never get your filthy talons on this disk.
On the contrary, Frederick. You are going to hand it over to me, along with my associates, your dear parents, or else I will destroy the one thing you care about most.
(2 Kriegstaffebots grab her) Freddie!
Excellent. (takes the Planispheric Disk) Auf Wiedersehen, you beautiful kinder.
(2 Kriegstaffebots throw Daphne into Fred and leave)
Now let's see who this Monstrous Freak really is.
(The Monstrous Freak weakened by a light transforms into conquistador)
It's...it's... Who is that?
If I'm not mistaken, it's El Aguirre, the captain of the Spanish conquistadors.
FEFernando El Aguirre
La pura verdad, the truth is simple. I did not want you to discover how to destroy the Evil Entity buried deep beneath Crystal Cove, in its Caja Demonio.
Like, that doesn't make any sense. I thought you'd be the first person who'd want that thing destroyed.
FEFernando El Aguirre
No! Do you not see? If you destroy the Entity, myself and my men will be set free from this ENDLESS CURSE. We should never be set free. We must pay for all the horrible atrocities we committed while in service to the Entity.
SSScooby, Shaggy, Velma, Daphne and Fred
Oh.
FEFernando El Aguirre
I can still hear their screaming. All the screams of the innocent ones. No. No! We must pay forever! We can never be set free!
Okay. Like, the old Spanish dude is a little loco in the cabeza.
Do not fret. All can be undone. All can be forgiven.
Yes. Yes, all can be forgiven.
That reminds me. Uh, be right back.
(In the real world, the gang wakes up)
(receives the best part of Dancing Man) I'm whole again. I'm whole! And I couldn't have done it without you meddling kids. You beautiful, brave, wonderful meddling kids! (dances)
Jinkies. After all we've been through, only to find out that we've been manipulated by some Evil Entity? Is that the only reason we're together?
Like, yeah. Maybe we don't even like each other.
Gang, wh-- what are we gonna do?
SScooby
The Heart of the Jaguar. We have to find the Heart of the Jaguar.
It's time to see who this ancient jade mask wearing weirdo really is. (unmasks Priestess)
SSScooby, Shaggy, Velma, Daphne and Fred
Professor Andelusossa?
He was staring us in the face all along. When the men in the village thought I was my mom, it was clear that no one was able to forget her over all these years. Then there were the vines. This plant isn't native to the Yucatan. Only someone with a background in gardening could have cultivated it and made it grow so quickly. Professor Andelusossa's first job was as a gardener. Finally, the vines on the boat had been tied to the wheel. The boat had been scuttled to make it look like the Professor had been attacked.
PAProf. Andelusossa
For love. Angie, when you left me that summer decades ago, you took my heart with you. Every night seems like I dreamed of you. When you called asking about the Heart of the Jaguar, I knew it was my only chance to lure you back, and find out if you still cared for me.
So you decided to test her love by crushing her with fast-growing killer plants! Wow. That's exactly what I would have done.
Oh, Freddie. That's so romantic. In your usual, unique kind of way.
PAProf. Andelusossa
And I would have gotten away with it, too, if... (sighs) if you had really loved me.
Oh, Enrique, sweetie, that was all years ago. There's only one man I ever truly loved, and that's my husband, Mr. Dinkley.
AMrs. Andelusossa
(arrives) Enrique, you are not a man! You're a fool! (spits saliva to Fred's head)
AMrs. Andelusossa
Mrs. Dinkley, you have won. You can have him!
UWUnknown woman
(arrives) Then I'll take him!
AAAngie, Mrs. Andelusossa and Prof. Andelusossa
Huh?!
UWUnknown woman
Tomina Kasanski. Call sign: Ice princess. I've been tracking you ever since you left Crystal Cove.
(arrives) Because I asked her to.
Lieutenant Kasanski is an old friend of mine from Fighter Weapons School. (she and Tomina Kasanski clapped their hands)
But why are you following us?
Well, it's kind of embarrassing, but three days ago, I had a nightmare that told me you were in trouble and that I had to come to the Yucatan to help you get some spear thingie.
SScooby
The Heart of the Jaguar.
Yeah, that! I'm supposed to help you get it back over the border and home to Crystal Cove.
Okay, that's it. I give up.
TKTomina Kasanski
Grab your prisoner and let's haul. I got a c130 waiting in an air strip 30 clicks from here. (takes Prof. Andelusossa into custody)
Well, gang, let's go home. We have an Evil Entity to destroy.
Focus, people. There are lives at stake. Something has taken my mom and the rest of Crystal Cove.
SScooby
It even took my Nova from the hospital.
What kind of horrible monster would snatch a sweet little dog in a coma?
SScooby
I know. Nova! Nova! (sobbing)
Quick, Scoob. Drown your sorrows in this pint of triple fudge cookie dough caramel chip. (gives the cookie to Scooby)
SScooby
Thanks, Raggy. I needed that.
As I was saying, I suspect this mystery is connected to the Evil Entity buried under Crystal Cove.
Like, hold on. You said you didn't buy into all this stuff.
Well, I still don't. But my mom helped me see the light and be more open. Maybe this is all science fiction, but a lot of science fiction turns out to be science fact. They laughed at Jules Verne when he wrote about submarines and going to the moon.
Like, they used submarines to go to the moon?
One thing is clear, this isn't the boogeyman, a vampire, werewolves, or an evil leprechaun. This is an extra dimensional intelligent being we're facing. It's real.
Wow, Velm. Like, that must have been some talk with your mom.
It made me remember that the advanced sciences have long accepted the possibility of other dimension. Now I guess things have gotten a lot less theoretical.
So you think having the evil intelligence under Crystal Cove could be why this town that is so weird?
Yes. And the weirdness is escalating (turns on the projector) because the time of Nibiru is upon us. I discovered that my computer model of the Planispheric Disk perfectly mirrors the planets in our solar system. You can see they're coming into direct alignment. Plus, there is a tenth planet: Planet "X". It's getting closer, about to come into alignment behind Pluto. It will cause a massive gravitational disruption not seen in 5,000 years. The time of Nibiru happens in two days. And it's this disruption that makes the fabric between dimensions of time and space extremely weak. That's why the evil thing buried beneath Crystal Cove must be destroyed. We know that the Heart of the Jaguar is supposed to be able to destroy this Evil Entity and undo all of its evil.
We also know the Spanish conquistadors used the Planispheric Disk to map the Entity's double-triple secret location.
Plus, the Planispheric Disk showed us the location of four keys.
Like, the old pistol, the helmet, the mortar bowl thingy, and a piece of old sail cloth.
It feels like we know a lot and nothing at the same time.
Like, welcome to our world. (chuckles) Right, Scooby-Doo?
SScooby
Yeah, we also know nothing. And we love it.
SSShaggy and Scooby
(dancing) We know nothing and we love it! Yeah! Ha! Yeah! Ha! We know nothing and we love it! Yeah! Ha! Yeah! Ha!
(The ground starts to shake)
Shaggy, Scooby, stop! Don't move!
(The ground opens the hole)
All my years of searching to find this door! I have done it! It will lead us to the treasure and more. Soon, very soon, the world as we know it will never be the same again. Niemals! (puts the Planispheric Disk in the gate, making it open)
Professor, won't the kids just follow us in?
Yes, they will. Und I need them too. I need Scooby-Doo. If I'm to take control of the great power below, the dog must be destroyed at just the right moment. Come! My destiny awaits. Und holen sie mir die Schachtel! (To Kriegstaffebots)
(The old gang and Kriegstaffebots enter the cave)
(The gang keeps the artifacts including Heart of the Jaguar)
All right, gang, now let's see where this uber mystery really leads. Ready?
SScooby
Professor Pericles is gonna regret the day he ever messed with Scooby-Dooby-Doo.
(The gang enters the cave)
Scooby-Doo! Mystery Incorporated · 255 quotes
