[talking to Lopez] Alright, that's the deal Mr. Robot. You fix our tank, we let you go free.
I thought the plan was to trick him into fixing the tank, and then Church will take over his body again when he is done.
Yeah, but you don't tell the person you are tricking what's going on, Caboose.
So, if I'm the one being tricked, then you will not tell me what is really going ON?
Why would we trick you?
Oh. [Pause] I think you know.
[looking through the sniper scope while standing on the upturned Warthog] Aw, crap. Hey, they got a guy fixing their tank.
Impossible! Our intelligence clearly states that-
[interrupting] We have intelligence?!
That the only soldiers in this canyon with mechanical training are that dead freelancer and Lopez- oh, wait a minute!
Sarge, are you thinking what I'm thinking? Lopez runs away, the jeep starts driving itself and suddenly there's a new guy on the blue team?
Yes, Simmons I am. Why, obviously the blue team has constructed some kinda diabolical mind-control ray beam that they used on Lopez and now he has to do their evil blue bidding.
[jumping down from the jeep] Or, since he's a robot, maybe they just reprogrammed him.
Or maybe that blue guy who got killed by the tank has come back as a ghost and now he's possessing Lopez's body. That could also explain why Sarge went nuts when we had the prisoner, the blue ghost probably possessed him too. And the jeep going nuts was probably a weird set of coincidences while the guy learned how to use Lopez's body.
[Pause]
I think I like the ray beam idea better.
Yeah, rookie. Your idea sounds a little dumb.
Hurry, hurry, hurry, fix the tank! So that I can say hello to Shiela... [Scary voice] and start killing everyone!
You mean all the Reds?
Of course... [Scary voice] for starters!
Thank you for activating the M808V Main Battle Tank.
Sheila! You're fixed! You're fixed!
Hello Private Caboose. It is good to see you again. Thank you for repairing me.
He didn't fix you, a robot did it.
Don't cock-block me!
No! Heauegerkergerk!
Hey Church, you okay in there? Church. Do I need to flip your switch? [Church reappears in the back round as in his ghost form]
What the?! That wasn't me! What the hell is going on here?! [Lopez turns towards the Blues]
Well, buenos días cock bites. Guess who's back?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Red vs Blue pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
