Command quotes from Red vs Blue

Recovery One, come in, level zero come in.

Come in, Command.

Hello Washington. We have you? How was the investigation at Blue Base?

Enlightening. Going to try the red base now, I'm hoping things there will be a little more... [A pink pop-up of Donut appears for no reason] ...normal.

Sarge

Halt in the name of the red- [clears throat] I mean "lightish red army. This base is operating at full capacity. And if you come in here, you're gonna get in to a big uhn-uh slap-fight!"

Heuhhh... I'm gonna have to call you back.

Sarge

Don't come any further, ooh la la.

Sarge

This is your last warning, stay out! I love math!

What in the-

Sarge

Your only hope of survival is to kiss my commander's ass!

Sarge

And this is another warning: I know the other warning was supposed to be last, but I never listen to orders, 'cause I'm too lazy and stupid! And ugly. Did I mention ugly?

This is gonna be a waste of time, I can tell already.

Sarge

[Pops up in front of Washington] Yeah, freeze intruder! Stop yer intrudin' right there.

Who made these things?

Sarge

I did.

Wait, you're real?

Sarge

Of course I am. You fell for a classic misdirection. I still got it. Heh heh.

Go ahead, Command.

Wash, we have a beacon.

I'm getting it too. Do you have coordinates and an ID?

Are you sure about this? I mean this is how we can be-

Command, you're breaking up on me, please repeat, how what can be-

Hold on, I'm not talking to you Wash. And, and you're sure? Okay. It's Agent Maine, Wash.

What?

Please confirm last transmission Agent Washington.

Maine? How can that be? If-

Please confirm, Recovery One.

Yeah, it's him. It's the Meta.

What!?

Command, give me those coordinates now.

The Meta is a Freelancer?