Reba quotes

Jake

I wanna stay with Mom.

Cheyenne

I want to go with Dad.

Kyra

Is boot camp an option?

Kyra

Barbra Jean's pregnant!

Jake

I thought Cheyenne was pregnant!

Cheyenne

Shut up, Jake!

Kyra

Back off. He's just a stupid kid.

Jake

I'm not stupid. She left the pregnancy test in the trash can.

Reba

Why is it we're the only family in Texas without a gun?

Kyra

So when Daddy marries Barbra Jean, what am I suppose to call her anyway?

Reba

You're not suppose to call her anything, when you see her at the Wal-Mart, just point to her and say, "There she is. The woman who stole my daddy."

Brock

Reba, I have to marry her!

Reba

Have to? The only reason you'd have to marry her is-- Oh my god.

Cheyenne

Dad! How could you!?

Kyra

Don't worry, Mom, I know all about birth control.

Reba

Oh, really? And what age is it appropriate for a young lady to become sexually active?

Kyra

40.

Reba

Have I mentioned you're my favorite?

Barbra Jean

There she is, the mother of the bride.

Reba

(crying) You were only suppose to bring the ice.

Reba

Momma's got a dark side.

Cheyenne

Getting married is so much fun! We should have done this in our junior year!

Reba

No, honey you were smart to wait.

Okay, why don't we begin with the custody arrangements?

Cheyenne

Oh, I wanna live with Dad.

Jake

I wanna stay with Mom.

Kyra

Is boot camp an option?

Barbra Jean

God created women to carry babies and men to carry footballs.

You are just precious.

Reba

My parents gave this pillow to Brock and me for our third aniversary.

Kyra

Well, we know it's not a magic pillow.

Cheyenne

I need to wear something that says: "Mrs. Montgomery."

Kyra

How about a t-shirt that says: "I'm with Stupid?"

Reba

Nothing says eternal love like the pooka.

Cheyenne

Good, Van fell between the beds, once when we weren't even doing anything!

Reba

I really gotta stop asking questions...