Emory and I are lab partners in Biology. We've played doctor together on more than one occasion. [giggles]
S1 E12The Trial of Emory Dick
S1 E13Hope in a Jar
I never should have snuck that sip of water last night. I'm such a pig.
I gave her a blow out that would have straightened the pacific coast highway and now look!
What's scary is that April Tuna is the black hole of beauty.
No! She's the ultimate make-over challenge. Listen up, chicken of the sea, our Glamazon icon, our very lifestyle is at risk and I don't lose! Got it? Get ready to strike a pose, or else.
Nicole Julian and Stone Cold are like fashion and anorexia – they go together.
ATApril Tuna
Hello Harrison John. Though you are not the dream boy I have bondage fantasies about... that would be the hard bodied Stone Cold... You would be an adequate setting for the fiery ruby that is April Tuna. Please pick me up Friday at 8 o'clock with expensive hothouse corsage in hand.
You know what April? You're too late, I snagged him first.
HHarrison
Hey, sorry April.
ATApril Tuna
Yeah, well, I'm not sure if you're Alpha male for me anyway, you scrawny Beta Harrison John.
HHarrison
Ouch, rejected by April Tuna…
Mature? You? Please. You're still wear training bras.
Well, if that isn't the pot calling the kettle flat.
S1 E14Caged!
Does anyone have any nosh? Fruit, frozen yogurt, tuna packed in water?
[to Sam] Who carries tuna packed in water?
Wait, I have something. It's a Cert covered in lint!
Give it to me! I'm the thinnest, I need the nourishment!
Shut your dirty whore mouth, player player!
S1 E15Booty Camp
Oh my god! Is that Sugar Daddy's butt?! Mary Cherry, you are from planet perv!
S1 E16All About Adam
You know Brooke, it pains my heart to disagree with you, darling, but as a Christian, I'm just not comfortable with a man's hairy hands touching my spongy parts, propelling my buttocks heavenwards.
S1 E18Ch-Ch-Changes
Look at you. You ain't got a buzz cut and you're wearing a pesto sweater from Banana Republic. Sorry, I was looking for a lesbian! Have a nice day.
PPolice officer
I'm gonna have to give you a ticket.
And I'm gonna have to give you the finger.
PPolice officer
That's it. I'm booking you! Spread em!
Only after a wedding proposal and a credit check!
S1 E19Hard on the Outside, Soft in the Middle
Wait, you are admitting to me that the only reason Brooke got a higher grade on her natural selection report is because her paper was packaged better?
[whispering] Are you taping me?
No.
In that case, yes I admit it.
While we're on the topic of hair miss Mc-rat's-nest, may I tell you that the messy braids and the drab coffee color you've been sporting on your noggin this year, not only detract from your looks but might force me to knock your current B grade to a C!
That is just wrong.
No, that's natural selection.
[as a brunette] You guys, come on, we can win without financial bribery.
Hon, update for ya - as Brunettes our only power is money.
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