Vittles is Grandpa-ese for "food."
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
I sure got you guys. You should have seen your faces! Only unsophisticated, immature brains would believe in monsters. Yes, it takes a mature adult such as myself to know that... there's... [sees Dr. Doofenshmirtz running from fake Bigfoots] no... such thing as... G-G-G-BIGFOOT! [runs away screaming; the kids look over and see nothing]
Well, I do not believe her one bit. Too much overacting.
Then I guess I'll just find a nerd and take his underpants.
That sounded like screaming children. But it's not my birthday.
DDad
[opening the window after hearing an engine and a loud horn] Oh, hey boys.
Dad, you might want to wipe the queen off your face.
DDad
Oh, yeah. Thanks... Crickey! A monster truck!
Yeah! Isn't it sweet? It's to help Candace how to parallel park and stuff. We figured if she learned how to drive one of these monsters, she'd have the confidence to drive anything.
Oh yeah, brilliant, but I'd better check with Mom about this... [calls Linda on his cellphone] Hello honey. Yes, yes. I love you too, darling. Are you aware that the boys have a monster truck in the backyard?
[at a cooking class] Honestly, you're as bad as Candace.
Okay, okay, just checking. [hangs up the phone] It's a go boys! I'll get your sister!
Wait a minute! I can still give Mom the one thing the boys can't, the gift of music! Played on my friend: the bass. [Doofenshmirtz's Shrinkspheria shrinks the bass as she begins to play it] Huh, oh well, it's a good thing I play the banjo! [the banjo shrinks] It's a good thing I play the bassoon! [the bassoon shrinks] It's a good thing I play the bugle! [the bugle shrinks] It's a good thing I play the bongos! [the bongos shrink]
Five minutes later...
[frantically] It's a good thing I play the balailaka! [the balailaka shrinks] It's a good thing I play the bagpipes! [the bagpipes shrink] I should have manned the omelette station!
Yeah, we're inside Candace's stomach.
That's creepy on so many levels.
She's on a date with Jeremy. That means we're on a date with Jeremy.
Again: creepy on so many levels.
[almost crying] Oohhh! I can't believe I am just stuck here. I can't believe I'll never get to get my driver's license or wear my dream dress to the prom. [sitting down and drawing in the mud] But most of all, I can't believe I'll never see Jeremy again. How long are we supposed to just sit here?
I don't know. Ferb and I have decided to use this time as an opportunity to practice patience.
[despairingly] Lovely. Well I suppose things can't get any worse. [it starts to rain] Oh look, the world's first bad hair day... [seeing the T-Rex right over them] So Phineas, where's this rescue party you sent for?
Hmm. It occurs to me I may have misspelled "time machine" in the plans.
Well, I hope that's not going to be an issue.
Whatcha doin'?
We're fixing this time machine.
Isn't that kind of impossible?
That's a possibility.
Curse you, Peter the Panda!
[to Phineas] You know, there's an "m" in "Time Machine."
Yeah, sorry. Take it away, Ferb.
[seeing cord] You mean to tell me you built a time machine that has to be plugged in?! [dinosaur roars] Oh put a sock in it!
Candace, no sudden movements.
What does it matter? We're all doomed anyway. I mean, where are we supposed to find electricity in DINOSAUR LAND?! [gets zapped by lightning]
Perry the Platypus, I-I'm so sorry I hurt you, when I wasn't actually trying to hurt you. If you give me another chance, I promise to hurt you in the right way. With cartoonish physical violence and elaborate traps constructed out of strange things I purchased over the internet. What do you say?
[rewinds cassette repeatedly] Fossils... da da da. Fossils... da da da. Fossils... da da da. Fossils... da da da. Fossils... da da da. Fossils...
Pardon me, would your name be Swampy, ex-drummer for the band Love Händel?
SSherman
That, my friend, was a past life. The name's Sherman. Why ya askin'?
Because they're reforming for one night only! It's a celebration of our parents' anniversary.
SSherman
Well, that sounds charming, boys, but I haven't played drums since the accident. Fell asleep in a metronome factory; when I woke I completely lost my sense of rhythm. I've been hanging out here ever since. [backing a beat with a library stamp and books]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Phineas and Ferb pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.