Jennifer quotes from Parks and Recreation

Jennifer

Ben bought one hour of my time. I heard you need some consulting?

Leslie

Well uh...I guess. I mean how are you? How's your family?

Jennifer

Okay I get paid $1200 an hour. Do you really wanna spend any of that time talking about my mother and her 19-year-old Korean husband?

Leslie

...That does sound fascinating but you're right, let's talk.

Jennifer

Now you might win. You're smart, Ben is smart, you might win. But why would you want to?

Leslie

Because it's my dream job.

Jennifer

Then dream bigger. Look, you love this town. It’s being run by monsters and morons? Get a better job! Rise above their heads! Effect change at a higher level! Don't be the kid that graduates high school, then hangs out in the school parking lot. Be the woman who moves away, climbs the ladder, and confidently comes back and has sex with her hot old English teacher just for kicks.

Leslie

Is that what you did?

Jennifer

Yeah, Mr. Baker. Sex was pretty good, thanks to me. Look, Pawnee has done you a favor. You’ve outgrown them. You’ve got talent, you’ve got name recognition, which means that you have a bright, wide open future with a thousand options. State Senate. Federal jobs. Even Congress. All of these are doable for you. And you can trust me...because I don’t care enough about you to lie.

Jennifer

Uh oh. Oh time's up. Okay if you want to keep talking you're gonna have to pay me 1200 more dollars.

Leslie

Uh...I just need to...

Jennifer

I swear to God if you say one more word, you will legally owe me $1200 and I will sue you! Let's not end it like that! Okay. Great to see you Leslie. Those five words are on me. [Starts to move chair back] Should I move this back? Don't answer it!