Did I miss it?
No, he's letting him sit.
Sit?! He gets a chair? He -- he kills bunnies!!
S6 E21Toxic
S6 E22Legend: Part 1
[As they walk into the squad room]
Tony, I am not arguing with you.
You're arguing now.
No I am not.
Are too.
This is not an argument.
Yes it is.
(exasperated) No, it's not.
Yes. It is. (phone rings) Hang on...
[Tony proceeds to answer Ziva's phone for her, teasing her as she walks up about the man on the other end before she snatches it]
(wanders to McGee's desk) What were we arguing about before?
(gives him a look) We were not arguing.
Oh, right. Yes we were.
Do you understand that that's what we were arguing about? The fact that you will argue about the least little thing. Sometimes you will argue about nothing at all... you just want to argue.
That's not arguing, McContrary. C'mon. Have a little insight. That's bantering.
No, it's not. 'Banter' is light-hearted, witty repartee.
(grins) Go onnn...
(looks annoyed for a moment, then gives up and smirks) It's your turn to get the coffee. Go.
Long distance can be hard. Telefriend from Tel Aviv?
You're jealous.
I'm not jealous.
Yes, you are.
No, I'm not. I'm not arguing, boss.
Argue!
Am not!
He got a name?
Who?
The star of David.
Oh, him. Yes, he has a name.
Trevor? Bruce? Marmaduke?
Michael.
Hm. He sounded more like a Bruce than a Michael on the phone.
Okay, grab your toothbrush.
Road trip?
Los Angeles.
Cali-for-ni-ay. What time do we leave?
Not we. [Points to McGee]
McGee? Not me? McGoo? You?!
Are you going somewhere?
Yeah. That's what I came down here to tell you. Los Angeles.
Into the lionesses den?!
[Kisses her cheek] I'm taking McGee.
Gibbs. It's just last time you guys went to L.A. one of you didn't come back.
I'll bring him home, Abs. [Walks away]
Just make sure you bring yourself back, too.
Get any more hits on our secret thing?
Do you know how busy I've been?
I know how busy you've been.
Okay, just asking. We got one hit, but it is a doozy. Guy on the right, Michael Rivkin, our supposed Israeli banker. Guy on the left, director of Mossad, Eli David. Also known as --
Ziva's father.
She must know Rivkin.
You don't ask her. You don't breathe a word of this, Abby. [Deletes file]
Tony.
I mean it.
S6 E23Legend: Part 2
[Speaking of Abby] Ignore her, probie, she's suffering Gibbs withdrawal. Transferring it onto you because of a deep seated fear that Gibbs may withhold love and give her a first time head slap if he came back and saw his desk festooned in balloons and decorated like some tacky Tiki bar with messages of affection written possibly in blood. She ain't missin' you at all!
Are we fighting?
If we were you would be on the floor bleeding.
Okay, I accept that as a likely outcome.
I have a problem with your boyfriend killing our two prime suspects.
Really? In my country that would be cause for celebration!
Well, you aren't in your country and neither is he!
He's already killed two suspects.
Well, in my country that would be cause for celebration!
You're not in your country and neither is he!
S6 E24Semper Fidelis
Here come the clowns.
The FBI does have jurisdiction in the death of a federal agent.
Yeah, well I like our chances with Gibbs in there waving a chair around like Gunther Gable Williams. Lion tamer. He's my second favorite hero after Steve McQueen.
Sure, because riding a motorcycle looks cool and all, but --
But nobody messes with a man riding an elephant.
He did not get out this way.
FYFoster-Yates
Unless could cross a lawn without bending a blade of grass.
Not impossible with the proper training.
She can also do that trick where you put your ear to a rail and you can hear a train coming.
FYFoster-Yates
You get the same training?
Me? No. But I can eat a bucket of chicken in one sitting, and I have x-ray vision.
FYFoster-Yates
So you and Ziva don't always agree on everything?
No, not everything. Healthy debates breeds, uh, creative solutions. Isn't that right, Ziva? [looks around them, puzzled] Where'd she go?
[from investigating up in a tree, gestures how intruders got past] A few branches are missing up here. They go in, he goes up, then out [points] that gate. [her cell phone rings, she smiles down at them] Oh, it's McGee.
Hey. Gibbs wants you guys to come back.
I'm up a tree.
Well, this might only confuse you further.
Well, who said I was confused?
You said you were up a tree.
I am!
Why is he calling you and not me? I'm the senior field agent.
I don't know why he's not calling you, Tony. [McGee, on phone, says 'I did call.'] He's not making any sense.
And you're the one not making sense.
He said he called you.
[looks at his cell] I'm not getting any signal. How come you're getting a signal and I'm not?
Because I'm up a tree.
Oh.
Ohhh. We often solve cases like this.
Goodnight.
Night. [watches Ziva leave]
Rule number eleven, DiNozzo.
I would never date a co-worker, boss. Trust me. I mean, why would you even -- [Gibbs smiles slightly] -- that's twelve. Eleven: when the job is done, walk away.
[...]
So, what's on your mind?
Rivkin's been in town.
I know.
With Ziva?
The guy doesn't listen.
Does that bother you on a professional level or a personal one?
I'll tell you what. I'm having a little trouble untangling the two.
So you are bothered.
Oh yeah.
S6 E25Aliyah
[about Tony] I am going to see him again, right, Leon?
He will not be harmed. Only two people have the authority to do that.
Your father's one. The other?
Me.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's NCIS pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.