Silver quotes from Mystery Science Theater 3000

I'll never understand what my son saw in you.

Oh, no? [turns to face him]

Do these explain anything?

Any.. studs around here?

Any what?

Daddy-O's. He-males. Stags!

Only the gardeners.

And Father Fabio!

Operator, I've dialed ORchard 4-2122 ten times! I can't get anyone to answer!

Well, you want me to go to the house and answer the phone?!

Maybe it's time you level with me.

You know how we're both hot?

Well, you remember the night you stood Chip up?

He died.

Well, he was real sore when he didn't find you...

And then he died.

... and he asked me to go in his place.

And then I killed him and he died.

He always kept saying I was too young to go anyplace, so I went.

And I killed him and he got all dead!

Oh, great.

It was fun at first when he only kissed me...

He wasn't dead then.

But then he...

...died.

... he started...

... being killed by me...

... getting too fresh and I ran away. Chip caught me and tried to throw me down on the ground...

Right before he got dead.

And then...

He died.

Rocks slipped out from under his feet...

And then he became killed.

He fell...

And he died.

So that's how they found my lipstick in his car! But where'd his friend come in?

He's not dead!

He saw it happen.

He died.

He thought it was you at first...

And then he died.

...until he saw me again.

And I killed him.

And all the time, you've been letting me sit here in jailsville!

[sobbing] I'm sorry, Silver, I tried to tell you the first time I came here!

[exaggerated sobbing] I TRIED TO TELL YOU THE FIRST TIME I CAME HERE!!!

It's all over the dam...

I just can't believe you went out with Chip!

What are you laughing at?

Oh, something in Dilbert. Never mind.

It's not over the dam, it's over the cliff! Funny, huh?

Ah, well forget it.

I'm scared... Fred's trying to send me to Tijuana.

And trade me for a chicken.

Tijuana?!

Maybe I can push Herb Alpert over a cliff...