Ugh. Look on the bright side - sure, the EEA closed your Friendship School, but now you've got time to do other stuff! It's like being on vacation!
[Twilight knocks Spike out of her bed]
A failure vacation! I'm supposed to be the Princess of Friendship, a leader of the free world—and all I did was make enemies with Equestria's allies, upset my friends, and get my school... [eye twitching] unaccredited! There is no bright side! [blows nose]
[stage whisper, to Spike] You didn't tell me this was a pity party! I would've brought ice cream!
Everypony's already tried to cheer me up. It won't work.
[short laugh] I'm not going to cheer you up. I'm going to tell you what you did wrong.
You gave up too easily. [beat] Hey, you made me a guidance counselor. That means tough love.
Guess what? The School of Friendship is back in business!
Do we still get to guess?
Where Yona?! This all pony's fault!
You're pretty quick to blame them! What are you hiding, yak?!
C-Can... Can we just focus on finding our lost students?
Nice try! You grubs are probably hiding the whole lot of them!
Please, every creature! If you can just explain what happened...
The students left us notes before they disappeared. When the school closed, they didn't want to say goodbye to each other. They claim they ran away to stay together.
I can't believe it! They did learn friendship!
[beat]
The students couldn't have done this by themselves. Some creature is hiding them! If the niece of our queen is not found soon, I promise there will be retribution!
Yeah? Well, my dragons will burn every kingdom until we find which of you is hiding Smolder!
Tell it to the griffon army!
Yaks fight griffons and dragons!
The Changeling Hive Empire can't afford an international incident. My people have made far too many enemies throughout the centuries. If any creature blames the Changelings for this—
What are you up to, shapeshifter?!
Find the students quickly, Twilight, or I fear our world will be at war!
Okay. Let's review what we know.
Smolder, Ocellus, Silverstream, Yona and Gallus disappeared together. [beat] That's all we know.
Maybe they were attacked by a ferocious shrimp! Nopony ever expects that!
[gasps] Shrimps can attack?
Nope! That's why no pony expects it.
We need to think like our students. If someone told us we would never see each other again, what would we do?
Go someplace we could all hang out and eat lots and lots of cupcakes! [beat] What?
Yona not really like school. But, Yona like new friends! [bear hugs Smolder]
[grunts] [strained] Smolder... like breathing!
You guys! I just found stairs!
[beat]
Aaaand we care because...?
Stairs are awesome! We don't have anything like 'em underwater 'cause you know, [magic zap] no way to climb 'em!
RS Rest of students
Ohhhh.
Is that Professor Egghead?!
Not bad! [quickly] For pony.
Hold on, please! I'm sure Princess Twilight Sparkle has a good explanation for all of this.
I do! It's true that my School of Friendship is EEA unaccredited...
Look! She said it without doing the eye thing!
It's not an EEA school. It's a Friendship school, with its own rules. I should know; I wrote the book.
Ugh, fine! If you promise to stop singing, Smolder can stay!
Uh, if dragon stay, yak stay.
I know you will make the changelings proud, Ocellus.
You belong here. Now, can you show me those stair things you mentioned?
[incoherent excited noises]
[to Gallus] What? You belong at home! You think I care if you've made friends?
Please, Grandpa Gruff? [whimpers]
Alright, alright! Stop doing that!
[students cheering]
Guess I make a pretty good guidance counselor, huh?
Yes! Writing the rulebook was the most fun ever! I can't wait to start working on the new lesson plans!
...with some help from my friends.
[deadpan] What do you call an Alicorn with no wings and no horn? [beat] Earth pony.
[deadpan] But seriously, being an Earth pony isn't so bad. We've got magic powers, too. Like walking around. And picking stuff up with our teeth.
[ponies questioning punchline]
[deadpan] That's sarcasm, by the way.
[laughs] That's funny, 'cause it's true!
[to Unnamed Unicorn Mare #3] Goodbye.
That's what you've been standing here all this time to say?
I was deciding between "goodbye" and "see you later".
Uh... but, they're the same thing.
Technically, they're very different. "See you later" implies an event in the near future wherein we see each other. "Goodbye" expresses good wishes where parting or at the end of a conversation.
I will not apologize for speaking with precision.
[deadpan] Pinkie, the reason I've been so busy is that I have a boyfriend now.
That's so exciting! My sister, in love!
[deadpan] Technically, we're in "like".
I mean, [laughs] you! You, you, you!
I'm... really into sticks, too! They're great for hitting piñatas! Huh?
[crying] I don't understand! How could Maud like Mudbriar? Is it Opposite Day? Nothing makes sense!
FS Fluttershy's apparition
I'm not shy, and I hate animals!
RS Rarity's apparition
Fashion?! Not for me, darling!
AS Applejack's apparition
[spits] An apple a day is downright disgusting!
RD Rainbow Dash's apparition
Slow and steady wins the race!
TS Twilight Sparkle's apparition
I never learned to read!
MF Mane five's apparitions
[laughing]
What if I don't like cupcakes?! [screams]
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These quotes come from Wikiquote's My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License .
