Can I ask you something? When we were together, was I...
Was I... all right? You know, sex stuff?
We couldn't actually touch each other, so...
No, no, no. What we could do. Was I shit?
That's one of those no's that means yes. [Mimics her voice] "No!" [Default voice] Fucking yes!
What are you saying? I haven't said anything.
Yeah, but you were thinking it. Say it. Go on, I want to hear it.
Wait...! Is he better than me? [Chuckles and gestures to Simon on his phone] What, him? He's better than me?!
Er, don't talk about him like that!
When we're doing it, he's focused on me!
No, you just spent a lot of time watching yourself.
Oh, really? Look, you were like this. [Mimics masturbation for a moment]
Look, this is the reason that girls don't tell boys this stuff. Their egos can't take it.
Oh, so that's another thing that's wrong with me?
What is that supposed to mean?
Sometimes it's like there's this big fucking cloud just hanging over your head.
Oh, really? [Sucks teeth] "My life's shit! Everything's shit! I shouldn't even be here!" Look, if you don't want to hear it, don't ask.
[Lying to find a head between her legs] Emma?! What are you doing?!
I'm, er... I'm pleasuring you. [Emma appears] It's not generally a spectator sport, is it?
I thought it was you! [Emma walks away]
Is that why you were calling me Emma?
[Gets up after her] Emma! Wait!
Got one of your pubic hairs stuck in me throat here.
[Enters his quarters] Are you all right? You know when you think you know someone... and they turn out to be something different? Fuck it. I don't wanna think about it. [Sits on bed beside him] So what have you been up to?
Nothin'. Just hanging out. [Emma starts passionately kissing him and Curtis thwarts her] Oh... I don't think you really want this. [Emma starts taking off her dress] Put your clothes on.
Do you really wanna have sex with me, or is this just some kind of revenge fuck? 'Cause I don't want that. You don't need to do this. Put your clothes on.
I was wrong about you. Have I messed things up?
This is my dress. Why have you got my dress?
You're shagging her, aren't you?
No, no, it's not what you think it is.
So what is it, then? How did this get here? You're such a fucking prick.
What the fuck is going on? How did I get here?
Mark spiked you. Don't worry, I stopped him before he really did anything.
He's tied up in the boot of the car. Did the same to me last night. Spiked me. That's why I was so out of it.
What are you talking about?
There's something I need to show you. [Transforms into Mel]
Curtis isn't shagging me. He isn't cheating on you, and neither am I.
This is... totally insane.
I just wanted to run. To feel it again. To feel... good about myself. Being her, it... it was the only way I could do it. I never meant for any of this to happen... to hurt you. Thought I wanted it more than anything. It's not worth this. I need to find something else that makes me feel like that.
[Curtis opens trunk of vehicle to reveal a tied up Rudy] What should we do with him? [Rudy is now tied up to railings naked written on his chest; "I drug and rape"]
It was you, you've done this to me.
No one needs to know about that. And next time you find a girl unconscious, you don't touch her. You get it?
I was checking on you. Hm? It was you that was all grabbing me, nuh-nuh-nuh, kissing me and pushing me head down. I don't even like doing that. So who's the real victim here?
You never heard the saying, "no means no"?
Yeah, but you didn't say no. You said, "Suck my nipples."
I was spiked! I thought you were someone else. You didn't think it was strange when I started calling you Emma?
People say all kinds of weird shit during sex. I was fucking this bird this one time, right, I'm about to blow my load, and I went, "Auntie!" What's that all about?
You never look a gift horse in the mouth, do you? That's one fine looking gift horse you've got there. [Starts retching and coughing] Oh! Ooh, I've got it. [Holds up a hair]
For a bloke, he's got a lovely pussy.
[Seeing Rudy and Rudy Two] Who the fuck is this?
RRudy
It's my auntie. Who do you think he is?
What, you've got a twin brother?
RRudy
Nowt's getting past you, is it, today? Check out the big brains on the probation worker here.
Why's her wearing a jumpsuit?
RRudy
Because... sometimes I do my community service, sometimes he does it. We like to mix things up.
This isn't a job share. Whoever does the crime, does the boring, mindless shit.
RRudy
I have a question, right? What if we we're conjoined twins, yeah, with our heads? They're all mashed together, and we go out in the town, for a few beers, some bloke sees us and he's like, "Oi! You two-headed fuck!" He flips out, goes mental and batters the guy. Who does the community service then? Because they, they are conjoined with one massive head but with two personalities.
Well, we'll come to that bridge when we come to it.
I'm going to pretend like I never saw this, because I really can't be arsed. Just make sure one of you turns up. [Leaves]
[In disbelief] Oh man. That's insane.
RRudy
The old conjoined twins mind fuck works every time. Doesn't it?
FFriedrich
[Writing letter] My name is Friedrich Hirsch. I was born in Berlin in 1935. When the Jews were sent to the ghettos, I was given false papers and adopted by a German family. Shortly afterwards, my parents were sent to the labour camps. I was never to see them again. My adoptive parents were terrified that I would be found out. Every day they said to me, "Say nothing. Do nothing." I smiled and I saluted and I did... nothing, as everyone I knew was murdered. But now, I have a chance to change that. I am going to travel through time and kill Adolf Hitler. If I fail, I wanted whoever finds this letter to know that... I tried. I did... something.
[Flipping through papers] What is this? I said it had to be done alphabetically. Since when did J come before H?
If I'm so crap, why did you give me the job?
Because you have other talents. [Spins her chair and leans in seductively] Oh, yeah... you are very, very talented.
What, you mean I've got nice tits?
Yeah. [Simon enters and Nazi salutes with Shaun waving him off] Yeah... whatever.
You told me to let you know when the prisoner arrived. He's here. The old man we found with the stab wound on the estate, [produces envelope] he had this in his pocket.
Well, put it with the other shit!
[Takes off Seth's hood in interrogation] Morning.
What do you want with me?
Oh, I think you know what we want from you. 'Cause if you didn't, we wouldn't have found you being smuggled off the estate in the boot of a car. You'd have taken the bus... like a normal person. Now... you're gonna test some people... to see if they've got one of these powers. And if they have, you're gonna take it off 'em and you're gonna stick it in whoever I tell you to stick it in. Got it? Right!
[Referring to Friedrich stabbed by Hitler What's wrong with him?
He was stabbed. I think his wound's infected.
Well, can't you take him to a hospital or summat?
Nazis aren't big on compassion.
I was conscripted. I'll do what I can for him.
RRudy
Oh, they're... they're gonna... they're gonna find us!
No! They're not gonna find us, cause I have a plan. We're gonna go to Mum and Dad's.
They're our parents! They're legally obliged to hide us!
RRudy
Oh, yes, because I am sure they are dying to get involved. Last time Dad seen you, he called you a "little cunt"!
They fucking love me, man.
Yes. They worship me. In fact, sometimes, I think Mum loves me er... too much!
This guy who's taking people's powers... You said you deliver food to the cells?
Breakfast, lunch and dinner. They've got me working my arse off!
We need you to put this in his food.
You really need me to tell you?
He's a prisoner. He's not one of 'em! Ain't nothing personal.
Killing someone?! To me, that's fuckin' personal!
The Nazis are using him to take people's powers. They want them for themselves. When they get them, they're gonna use them against us. We can't let that happen.
[Enters room with Simon and Alisha What's going on?
He was just helping me with the computer. You know how shit I am with these things.
Yeah, she is particularly shit.
[Leans into him] I missed you.
Yeah? I only went for a piss.
I can still miss you, can't I?
See the effect I have on women? [They kiss and Shaun slaps her rear walking past her with Simon leaving]
