Jersey Shore quotes

When there was knockin' on the door, I was like, this is either the police for me, this is either some lawyer, somebody's dad, somebody's brother...

Vinny

[to Mike] How do I taste, bro? How does my dick taste, bro? Congratulations on my sloppy seconds.

Snooki

Can I have a roll please?

Don't worry, you got a couple.

I like my clothes like my women...options.

Pauly D

You like your girls like your underwear...dirty.

Snooki

You look at me you think I'm like a stuck-up bitch, but yet, like, veterinarian, like that's my soul, like I fuckin' like, save animals, like that's what I do.

Snooki

My boobs are so tight I can't breathe, is that normal?

Vinny

[about Pauly D's stalker] Yo, Pauly D has a little situation on his hands...she's definitely a stage 5 clinger.

Vinny

Snooki's outfit is crazy, she looks like a birthday cake, she's all decorated, dressed up, with the pink, boobs all out up in her face. I guess she wants to go out with a big bang, literally.

It's obvious that Sammi has a crush on me. It goes back to the days of prehistoric kindergarten.

Snooki

I'm not trashy, unless I drink too much.

I knew she was 18, that ass does not look 12.

It's juice-head central right now, I'm in heaven.

Ronnie

I regret that I got caught. I don't regret that I hit the kid, because he had it coming.

[to Snooki] If a guy doesn't like you, it's called fuck you, and there's so many people out there in the world that's gonna like you for you.

Tall, completely jacked, steroids, like, multiple growth hormones...that's the type I'm attracted to.