Harm quotes from JAG

He told me he wouldn't say anything unless I was screwing up, right? Ten minutes into the flight I haven't heard anything. I figure I'm acing it, right? Suddenly he clobbers me on the back of the helmet with his flight stick. He'd unscrewed it, put a note through it that said: "Plug in your headset."

Ted Lanier deserves to know the truth about the death of his family. I owe him that as a human being, as a representative of my country, and as a man who hopes to one day have a wife and child of his own.

(about his Dad) He was a strong man. Once on a fishing trip, he accidentally fell on a scaling knife. We were miles from any hospital. I watched him sew the wound up with a bass hook. He didn't wanna frighten me, so he told me shaggy dog stories while he was doing it.

Never underestimate the integrity of a Naval aviator.

Webb, I don't know whether to thank you or ram your teeth down your throat.

Webb, next time you're thinking about asking us for help, don't.

I've prosecuted too many cases to remember, but this is the one time if the accused had got off...I'd have killed him myself.

It's just like Stagecoach!

Uh huh, with John Wayne.

John Wayne was being chased by Iraqis?

Indians.

Right in the middle of Monument Valley.

Bet they didn't have a woman with them.

You'd bet wrong! They had a woman a lot like you. Claire Trevor.

Yep. Prostitute Duke fell for.

Are you comparing me to a prostitute?

Uh, no ma'am, I didn't say that!

I did! And I meant she was spunky.

'Spunky' doesn't cut it, sir.

How about pretty?

Takes a big man to admit he's wrong, Commander.

Well, I don't know about being a big man. But I was wrong.

You're damn right you were wrong. My son died for his country. You tried to take that away from me.

He didn't die for his country, Chief. He died for you.

(chuckles) What's that supposed to mean?

Your son was HIV positive.

What?

And he couldn't admit that to you. Or that he was a homosexual. So rather than face you, he stood up into Chief Connors' line of fire.

(disbelieving look)

Congratulations on your son's Navy cross, Chief.

You earned it.

When awkwardness goes to $40 a barrel, I want the drilling rights to Bud's head.

Aw, Harm, it just takes him a little while to get warmed up.

Warmed up? Love isn't baseball, Mac.

How would you know?

How you feeling, Major?

Lighter. I apologize for all the flying jokes I ever made.How many G's was that? Twelve million?

Seven G's.

There was a prisoner-of-war camp there in '70.

Willie

Now, how would you know that, commander? You'd be barely old enough to tie your shoes.

My father's MIA. I've been looking for him since I was old enough to tie my shoes.

Willie

You and your father must have had some relationship.

I didn't know him that long.

Willie

Well, he sure had a major influence on you.

Most parents influence their children. Your father, I take it, was a liar.

Willie

I grew up in foster homes.

Well, that would give you a reason to resent those who came from stable ones.

You didn't murder those men, Roscoe. You need to let go of it.

Willie

I'll tell you what, commander,you stop looking for your father and I'll let go of it. You see, we're the same, both obsessed in different ways. You keep searching for a place that I can never leave. It's supposed to be about starting over, beginning a new circle. Can you do that?

You have your closure, Roscoe. I need to find mine.

(speaking to Bud while he is eating a doughnut) Doughnut?

Bud

Power-nut.

Excuse me?

Bud

Not you, sir. The doughnut.