Adm. Chegwidden quotes from JAG

My request for resignation?

Got too busy to process it.

Thank you, sir. It's good to be back.

That remains to be seen, major.

You know, major, I think your talents may be wasted in administrative law.

I wholeheartedly agree, sir.

Well, shall we start fresh?

I'd like that. You know, there's something I've always wanted to do.

What's that? (she kisses him on the cheek) You're not gonna do that a lot, are you, major?

No, sir.

When's the party?

1900 tonight.

Tonight? But my dress uniform's at the cleaners, sir. I don't have a dress. I haven't done my hair.

Your hair's fine, Major. And Webb's taken care of the dress.

You don't even know my size.

Webb

36-24-36, 5 foot 8, plus 130 pounds.

120, thank you very much!

Commander, do not do anything to exacerbate the situation.

Don't worry, sir, you know me.

Yes I do!

What I approved was a simple piece of intelligence gathering. But your people have an uncanny knack for being where the trouble is.

I prefer to think of them as where they're most needed.

Webb

You're jumping to conclusions Admiral.

I'm going to be jumping to more than that if you don't get my people out of there now!

Webb

Oh, what are you gonna do? Break my nose again?!

(in signing out weapons) Humor me, Chief ... just every once in a while I like to blow the hell out of something.

I know what you mean, sir. That's a hell of a lot of firepower for a lawyer, commander.

Obviously you've never seen him in the courtroom.

You don't have to do this.

The hell I don't, sir.

Well, by my last count, we're about to violate at least seven separate provisions of the status-of-forces agreement with Italy. Hell, you'd better call me A.J.

All right, A.J. Let's do it.

Commander Rabb was there?

Apparently he was close by. He was not involved in the action.

Well, that'd be a first!

Why do you keep sending me reminder memos?

Excuse me, sir?

And why are they in large type?

Well, sir, you have, on occasion—

-- Misplaced my reading glasses.

It's just in case, sir.

You know, colonel, I've always respected your objectivity.

Thank you, sir.

Am I slowing down?

Sir, as we age, our physical skills diminish.

Wrong answer.

But our hearts grow stronger.

New Age mumbo jumbo. Well, hell, that's what I tell myself anyway. I'm glad you agree. Thanks.

Don't mention it, sir.

I won't. And incidentally, if you do, to anyone, I'll be on your 6 faster than a surface-to-air missile.

Understood, sir.

Sir, if there's any way I can aid in...

As a matter of fact, there is. I've got an appointment with the Armed Services Committee about my annual budget proposal. You'll pinch hit for me. We need a 4.3% increase.

Admiral, I hardly distinguished myself the last time I entered into that arena, sir.

Don't be modest, commander. You got the funds to repair the hole you shot in the courtroom ceiling.

She wants a chance to talk to my friends. Are we friends here?

I’d like to think so, sir.

I don’t think friends call each other ‘sir’.