House · Season 2
I think the first biopsy didn't give us the answer because you didn't go deep enough. I want you to do a white-matter brain biopsy.
[sarcastically] Absolutely. Don't blame you. The world is such a complicated place if you've got higher reasoning skills. I'm often jealous of small animals and retarded children. Take the antibiotics.
Unless Chase broke his neck falling off his polo pony, he had no reason to be in the E.R.
[to Foreman] Glad you're back. Cameron makes lousy coffee. I take mine black, the way I take my brain-damaged neurologists.
You're late.
And you are in my locked office, again.
Idiots are fun. No wonder every village wants one.
[trying to get a rise out of Foreman] I'm telling you, I'm going to drop the N-bomb if I have to.
You're addicted to conflict.
[looks at his Vicodin bottle] Did they change the name?
You're designing a kid, a loser kid, who's already getting pummeled at recess.
Here, knock yourself out. Go find sperm that can beat up 613's kids.
Diagnostically, she needed to be hurt. I wanted to hurt her. Win-win.
I'm a really good secret keeper, I never told anybody that Wilson wets his bed. Oh, you tricked me.
You're trying to end this discussion by grossing me out? I'm an oncologist, half my patients have their skin sloughing off.
Don't try to talk. You've got a big medical thing in your mouth.
He's got a temperature of 103.
And why do we care?
Because we're human beings. It's what we do. Said he was at a luncheon meeting.
You took his history?!
Guy looks like Harpo. You should see him.
You asked him what book he's currently reading.
It's hilarious to watch him try and talk. I asked him anything I could think of. Favorite color? "Bwuu."
[Cut to clinic.]
Favorite dessert topping? [The patient hesitates.] Trust me, you'll never know what fact may be the key to saving your life.
Whip cweam.
You wanna hear a story?
I have a rule: People who shoot me forfeit the right--
You're an ass.
Now, that is a bold position to take, given that I shot you.
The shooting just makes you an idiot. You're an ass because you're trying to wrap it in a flag like you did a good thing.
You're an ass and a hypocrite. You don't believe in rules, you do whatever you think is right, that's all I did; you were my role model.
Watch out, you're getting crumbs on the flag.
You think that the only truth that matters is the truth that can be measured. Good intentions don't count. What's in your heart doesn't count, but a man's life can be measured by how many tears are shed when he dies. Just because you can't measure them, just because you don't want to measure them, doesn't mean it's not real.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's House pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
