Jackie quotes from Hell's Kitchen

This year chefs get an early start on their Hell's Kitchen journey, and they couldn't be more exciting.

(interview) I think my competition is going to get overwhelmed. I'm going to destroy everybody, nobody's even going to come close you're all going to cry to your mommies.

First name is...

Jackie.

Where are you from?

(New) Jersey. [audience applauds] (interview) I am the epitome of Jersey. I'm tough, I'm beautiful, I'm sexy. I will kick your ass and suck your dick all at the same time.

What's under the dome?

[removes lid] I have a seared scallop and grilled corn salsa.

[notices that there is only one scallop on the plate] Wow. Now, are we on a diet?

No. [some of the contestants laugh with the audience] I thought it looked nice with just one.

I thought I'd get more from a Jersey girl. Every time I've been there, man, they're generous.

I know.

[eats the scallop] I'd love to give it a four. I can't, there's only one scallop there. I'm gonna give it a three. Three out of five.

Thank you, chef.

With Jackie having a respectable dish, Rhode Island culinary manager, Kevin, is putting his faith in his...

Chicken Caesar piadina.

[facepalms] There's a reason why you don't put fresh, crisp salad on a hot pizza. [Eddie shakes his head] Honestly, it looks... terrible. The dough's uneven. How'd you make that dough so quick?

Um, it was a pre-prepared dough.

So you didn't make the dough?

No. [audience groans]

[whispering] Shit.

And is it an authentic Caesar dressing?

Pre-made. [audience groans again; someone shouts at Gordon not to eat the food]

(interview, facepalms) Kevin!

Store-bought dough... store-bought Caesar salad dressing. Let me ask you something. Do you want to go home?

(interview) Oh, God. This is not good. [to Gordon] I'll do better, chef.

You'll do better?

I will. I can show you I will.

One out of five. That's all you get. Terrible.

(interview) How many red chefs does it take to make an appetizer? Uh... everybody but Vanessa.

Son of a bitch.

What I did was I got some pancetta and rendered it down to crispy, just for another texture, and to enhance the flavor of the burger. And a little bit of liquid smoke.

Liquid smoke?

Yes, just... just a drop.

I didn’t ask you to get crazy. I just wanted you to cook what was on your back. Do the recipe.

(interview) Frank, I want to grab you by the neck and just shake you. The recipe is the recipe, and you can’t deviate from it.

(to Frank) Here’s the thing. Had you followed the recipe, that would’ve been a near perfect burger. Ashley, congratulations. Point to the Red team.

Thank you, chef.

Good job, Ashley.

(interview) She only won because I lost. That’s not a winner. That’s–that’s not a winner.

[holds the ticket] On order, four covers of table 32. Don't wait for me. Appetizers fire one special table, two side scallops, two risotto. Entrée two Arctic char, two wellington.

Yes chef.

Two wellington?

Hey hey, ladies! That was flat.

Yes chef.

Vanessa, call back the order!

We have special table side, we have two [looks clueless] fuck. [rings a buzzer]

I called this out ten seconds ago. Entrées what were they, Vanessa?

They were one, well-- fuck [looks confused and clueless once again] (begins attempted interview and looks still confused)

I am so sorry did not hear that.

Listen, concentrate, get your head down.

Yes chef.

Meanwhile, back in the red kitchen...

Garnish walking, girls! [walks Wellingtons to the pass]

Put them down.

Thank you, chef.

Chef Ramsay is looking for Jackie to deliver...

Arctic char! Arctic char! [holds a pan of perfectly cooked risotto]

...and finally complete the second order of entrées.

(Arctic) char. (sends it to the pass)

(returns the char and sauce to workstation) Hey! Hey, all of you, come here. Just touch that. Dannie, just touch that. COME ON! COME ON! QUICK! JUST TOUCH THAT!

Yeah. It's cold.

Touch it! Touch... [heavily smashes the char] Fuck! Stone-cold! Jackie, we're stuck in neutral.

(interview) FUCK MY LIFE! Chef Ramsay is going to eliminate me right here.

Jackie, come here! Fucking useless!

Oh no!

Oh no!

For the last time, get it together!

Yes, chef. Now I got to refire this fucking shit!

(talking to the waiter) Go. Come back for the Arctic char, yes?

How long on this char, Jackie?

How long for that char?

Three minutes, chef.

The rest of the table are eating their entrées.

I know, chef.

You guys can start. Start before it gets cold.

(interview) Fucking half the table's eating. So I got Chef Ramsay screaming, "Where's the char?"

Arctic char?

(interview) Don't worry, I'm with it. I'm 'bout to 'bout it.

I cannot wait! It's not good enough!

Hey, all of you! All of you, come here!

Ugh! I'm--

Come here! It's cold and raw! Uh, I-I'm done! [slams the char to a plate] I'm fucking done! I AM DONE! GET OUT! GET OUT!!! I TOLD YOU I WON'T TO PUT UP WITH ANOTHER SERVICE THIS BAD, GET OUT, VANESSA! GET TO THE DOOR! [throws Vanessa's apron on a table when she is on her anger]

(whispers) Damn it. [Jackie throws her apron on a table]

(interview) THIS SUCKS! Somebody needs to go home tonight. It's just completely unacceptable.

It's like we're hitting walls instead of jumping hurdles.

Christina Wilson

Get your top kit set.

OK.

Christina Wilson

Make a list of everything you don't need.

Got it.

(interview) Every kitchen has a prep list. Normally we don’t title the list... we just know it’s the list.

Okay, this is the list. I'm gonna put "The Fucking List".

(interview) Jackie wrote "The F-ing List". Like... why would you write that?

Christina Wilson

(to Kristin) "The Fucking List?"

The fuck– I didn't write that. So respectful, right? (interview) What are you thinking, Jackie? Disrespect like that does not fly anywhere.

Christina Wilson

(to Jackie) Is this you? It's disrespectful, is what it is. NEVER AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD!!! If any--(Jackie starts to say something; Christina then points on her) SHUT UP!!!

(interview) She did not think that was very funny.

Christina Wilson

[holds Jackie's list] If any of this happens in this kitchen again, the fucking list, whoever writes it will be finishing "The Fucking List"!

It wasn't disrespecting you.

Christina Wilson

You just interrupted me. Take a seat! (letting Jackie to sit on a chef's table) Have a seat and sit down. Just sit down! Never again! It’s a professional fucking kitchen! You would be FIRED if you-if you worked for me! You want to have a (notices Jackie shrugging)—OH, YOU DON'T CARE?

No no.

Christina Wilson

YOU DON'T CARE?

No no.

Christina Wilson

(pointing her finger to Jackie again) This is your teammate. Find the cancer in your team and work around it!

(interview) Jackie brought our whole morale down. She has to go. I'm-I'm done with her.

Christina Wilson

[letting the red team out of the kitchen] Go have lunch.

(interview) I'm the type of person where I can joke, joke, joke, and then boom, jump on a desert and get the shit done. But these morons don't see that.

Let’s jump to the chef's table, please! Two tuna, one wellington!

Yes, chef!

Two tuna, two minutes!

Working!

Meese, how long for the wellie garnish?

Ah!

Just give me a time, Meese! (interview) It is very hard to run the garnish station when you do not communicate! [to Meese] Garnish, talk to me! [to Gordon] Walking with wellington.

(Arctic) char is in, right? Walking with tuna!

Where’s the garnish?!

I don’t know, chef.

What is she (Meese) doing?!

The wellington garnish is up, isn’t it?

(interview) Bitch, keep control of your station! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

What are you doing? What are you doing?!

I’m sorry.

God, I’m trying to help you!

Meese!

Yes, chef.

I don’t want my guests eating on an installment plan!

Kris Jenner

[laughing] He did not just say that!

(goes to the Blue kitchen) Hey! Hey, Blue team!

Yes, chef.

(to Eddie and Alan) You two, on desserts. The rest of you, jump into the Red Team and help them finish! Now!

Yes, chef!

NOW!

Where we at?

Who’s on fish? I’ll hop on fish!

What do we got working?

That’s already reduced in there. Right here.

I can’t believe this is fucking happening.

It’s fucking burnt, throw it out.

(interview) These boys just bomb-rushed our kitchen, kamikaze style. Like, fucking... [imitates bomb falling and going off]

As soon as those two tunas are ready, we’ll go to the pass!

Why are you screaming?!

I’m not screaming! THIS IS HOW I TALK!

(interview; impersonates Hassan yelling at her) "You guys need to listen to me, ‘cause I’m Hassan, and I'm big, and I blah-blah-blah!" Shut up!

Tuna going to the window!

[to Sous Chef Christina] On your left, two fish.

Okay, let’s go.

First ticket out, team! Loving the teamwork, guys!

With a very vocal Hassan leading the charge, the men have taken over the red kitchen...

[to Kris Jenner] And I have your tuna.

Kris Jenner

Smells so good.

...delivering entrées to the chef’s table and grateful customers in the dining room.

Last table now! Two Arctic char, four wellington!

Let’s go, guys.

I’m walking char.

Heard!

She’s (Jackie) got the wellies right behind you.

Service, please.

Alright, guys, let’s clear it down.

Christina Wilson

[to Red team] Please thank the gentlemen for finishing your service two nights in a row!

Thank you, guys!

No problem.

Fucking pathetic-ass shit. Bullshit ass team. Worst team ever.

Over in the red kitchen...

Tuna and New York Strip?

Coming to the pass in 15 seconds, chef.

Hassan and Dannie hope the the third time's charm with their refired New York Strip and Tuna.

Coming out the pass, one New York (Strip).

One tuna.

(interview) There's no option to fail we can not fuck this up. If we do, another one of us is going home.

Fucking steak's raw. Hey, hey, Red Team! RED TEAM!

Yes, chef?

It is contagious. There's just mistake, after mistake, after mistake! DO ME A BIG FAVOR, ALL TOGETHER, FUCK OFF! GET OUT! GET OUT!

What happened?

What the fuck man?!

(interview) Kevin's gone. Tonight's dinner service was a complete disaster, the front of the train went off and the back just followed. (in the dorm) It was... just nipping in the but. Joe, biggest fuck-up of the night.

(to Frank) Yeah.

Where's the fucking lobster? Come on, Hassan! Just hurry up!

[wipes forehead with his sleeve] Ten seconds, chef! Fifteen seconds, I'm sorry, chef!

(interview) Hassan, you look like you're melting into the lobster. I guess it’s the Red Team’s secret ingredient!

[to Hassan] Hey, young man. PSST!

Yes, chef.

You're sweating into the lobster. It's dripping! I don't want a fucking lobster covered in your sweat! Is there a bandana or something, PLEASE?!

Jackie, Red team's first nominee, and why?

Our first nominee is Ariel. The fish station completely collapsed. The scallops, everything was just bad.

Red team's second nominee, and why?

Hey, they voted for me.

(to Jackie) They voted for you?

Yes.

WHY?

I really don't know. I believe it should have been Ashley, 'cause if I was on either one of those stations, I would have ran it way better.

(interrupting Jackie) We chose Jackie, chef, because of her lack of progress. It doesn't help us to have to be creative for her.

That's not true, Chef. What a mess.

(to Kristin) Kristin, give me your lighter?

No.

Give me your fucking lighter?

Talk like fuck-- touch my lighter. You'll touch my fucking lighter, I'll punch you in your face.

Punch me in the face.

Give me my goddamn lighter, Jackie!

Punch me in the face.

Jackie, give me my fucking lighter!

Punch me in the face.

Either light your cigarette or give me my fucking lighter!

(looks distressed) Ooohhh...

(enters the living room) What the fuck is going on here?

I'd stay far, far away if I were you.

You are disgusting ass bitch.

Don't fucking disrespect me! (throws the wine cap on Kristin's shoulder)

What are you gonna do about it?

WHAT ARE YOU-- GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FUCKING FACE!

What are you gonna--?

GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FACE!

What are you going to do about it?

(to Kristin) Kristin, sit down.

Yeah, I'm dead.

GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE WITH THE SHIT! (leaves Jackie's cigarette to throw out of Kristin's left arm)

PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME!

Jackie!

PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME!

YOU ARE A PIECE OF SHIT! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FACE! (Jackie throws out of cigarette ash to Kristin's shoulder) (gasps) Go ahead.

PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME!

Kristin!

FUCKING DONE! FUCKING DONE!!!

PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME!

GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY FACE!

Kristin, sit!

Get the fuck off-- (leaves)

(to Kristin) Go ahead! (Kristin ignores) PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME, BITCH!

Are you fucking serious?! (exits the dorms)

(mocks) You fucking serious!

(interview) No! No, bitch! Sit the fuck down! Like I'm so over her causing a big scene like I don't know who the fuck you are with garbage can that you dragged out of but what the fuck is wrong with you?

As those ashes smell. (interview) Kristin, it's a game now and it is too fuck with your mind. That's what happens when you can't fucking strangle a bitch.

(to herself; acts crazy) CRAZY, DERANGED.