Melanie quotes from Hell's Kitchen

All of you, come here! Grab a spoon, come on! [knocks his hand on the workstation] Hurry up and taste that! What does that need?

Mascarpone.

Where's the butter?

There's no butter, there's no richness and it's just bland. (to Nicole and Simone) Can you make risotto now?

Yes, chef.

(to Simone) You, yeah? Fuck off!

Yes, chef.

Come on, Nicole. Two more risotto, let's go.

Walking with the risotto, behind. (brings her risotto to the pass)

(interview) I'm a little concerned about Nicole stepping up because of her attitude and her unwillingness to be a team player.

I hope that shit is okay.

[checks Nicole's risotto; finds that there's no lobster in it] Where's the lobster? Nicole!

Yes, chef?

Come over! Two lobster risotto, where's the lobster?

It's my fault chef. I didn't put enough for two, I put enough for one.

Get some energy, or both of you, get out of here. Okay?

Yes, chef!

Get involved or fuck off home!

(on Kashia's wellingtons) Wellington's cooked beautifully.

Thank you chef!

Hey, don't dare start celebrating. Let's get that right.

Yes, chef.

Half the table's missing, Beth and Bev!

Yes, chef?

The two B's! (gets a piece of halibut) Just touch how firm that is. Just a dry, just flaky mess. Dry fucking mess. [throws the halibut on the tray]

(interview) Beth's got to pull it together, she want to be here.

(disgusted) Oh, fuck off.

(interview) I'm not stupid, I know how to cook fish.

(to Beth) Re-fire two halibut!

Heard that.

Shit!

Hey ladies, come here. Beth, that's you.

(interview) Oh, no.

The halibut is still raw. Just touch the skin, Beth. Move, it doesn't mind. It's dead. Soggy and cooked to fuck.

(interview) I don't understand why Beth and Bev couldn't pull it together for the life of them.

[angrily throws his towel in the workstation] SHIT. BYE-BYE. GET OUT!

(interview; sighs, then pretends to faint)

I want all of you now to go into the blue team, and get on every section and help them get out nine tables. Let's go!

Yes, chef!

(interview) That was a gangster service. I mean, we even had to go over and help the guys 'cause they didn't even know what the fuck they were doing.

[sees the red team enter the blue kitchen] Aw, here we go. This is fucking bullshit!

Alright, blue team! The ladies are finished! They're in here now to wake you up, and finish.

No, I'm good. I got a...

Hey, shut up! YOU FUCKING DO NEED HELP! Anyone that gives me a stone-cold crab cake twice, trust me, you need help!

(interview) Take the help! Run with it! The more help you take, the faster you can get out the kitchen!

Oh, my God. All of you, come here!

Oh, no!

This is brought by your captain! It's just raw, solid, pink halibut. You can't even rip it apart.

(interview) How stupid you look when the captain of our team brings us raw fish. She's just way over her head.

Melanie, are you done? Have you given up?! ANSWER ME!

I'm trying chef.

I'm not going to tell you one more time, cut the bullshit! Or go home! Good night!

Where’s your dignity, blue team?!

Anton lost our dignity.

CHICKEN WALKING!

Fish and chip!

Hey, hey Blue Team, all of you! Come here!

Yes, chef.

ALL OF YOU!!! Just touch that. Yeah, just touch how wet it is. It's not overcooked, it's like mush. It's like SOAKING WET DIAPER SHIT FISH AND CHIPS! All of you, come here. This is way too painful. You, you, you, you, you, and you, fuck off upstairs and have a rapid meeting. And come up with two individuals for elimination to get the fuck out of here. Now GET OUT!

[to Melanie] Two fresh fish and chips urgently!

Dropping right now, chef!

[interview] The blue team is a disaster. It’s a little hard for me to be a leader when I’ve got the Three Stooges standing on the other side doing shit. Open your ears and listen to what I’m saying. Because I’m speaking for a fucking reason.

My decision is...... Anton. Take off your jacket and stay there. (points to Sandra) Sandra, take your jacket off. (to Scott and Rochelle) Scott, Rochelle. Take your jackets off. All four of you, listen carefully. Since your teams felt that you were the reasons that they could not coordinate I'm changing it up. Anton and Scott, both of you are going to the Red team.

Fuck!

Rochelle and Sandra, both of you are going to the Blue team. [Jason gives a shocked look] Give me your jackets. Join your new teams. Everyone of you, right now has a chance of winning this competition. Stand out, shine. Get out of here.

In the Blue kitchen, Gabriel is unusually quiet.

Let's go, guys.

Gabriel, I miss your happy humor.

Maybe, a little too quiet.

I don't like this whole quiet thing.

I'm focused.

(interview) Gabriel is just like moping around like, I don't know. I don't know what he's dealing with, but he better snap out of it before dinner service starts.

You seem depressed. You don't seem focused. I don't like it.

What's on your mind, Gabriel?

Do you want me to kiss you?

I don't know.

(standing near the pantry) Gabriel, two seconds please.

(interview) Man, the service hasn't started yet, I'm about to get my ass chewed.

One big concern I have with you is that there's no fightback.

Yes, chef.

When you get in the weeds tonight, honestly you bounce back. You're still in the game. I have not given up on you.

I haven't given up chef.

Nothing would make me happier to see you rise and absolutely nail the service tonight, okay?

Yes, chef.

Let's go.

Back in the Blue kitchen, communication and teamwork are at an all-time high.

Walking wellington garnish in twenty seconds.

Last table, guys. Salmon, wellington yes?

Yes, chef!

Wellington. (brings her wellingtons to the pass)

Salmon walking behind. (brings his salmon to the pass)

(brings his garnishes to the pass) Walking with garnish.

Two wellington?

Two wellington.

Blue team!

Yes, chef?

All of you, come here!

Hey you guys, come up here.

(interview) Oh, fuck! What went wrong?

Just look at the standard. Seriously, I had some good services in my time in Hell's Kitchen, but nothing quite as good as tonight. That is immaculate. Great job. Well done.

Thank you chef.

Great job, team. (interview) WHOOOO! Best service so far. Holy shit, I called it, too! I mean, I can jump into the Red team tomorrow and have a great service. I can jump back into the Blue team mid-service and have a great service. (to Rochelle) Told you I'd make a difference on your team!

You did!

(to the Blue team) You guys, great job!

Thank you chef.

And Gabriel, welcome back!

Thank you chef. Thank you. (interview) Ohh, I'm so excited, man! I've killed it tonight!

(to the Red team) Red team, I'm disappointed! Kashia, I never taught you to braise salmon ever! Scott, I'm done with raw chicken! Anton, you sunk your team!

This oven here chef is 14 minutes, the other side is 18 minutes chef. [Rochelle shakes her head]

That oven there is the exact same as that oven.

I'm just saying that I should have went there and checked it out myself.

Okay, we can't blame the ovens right now.

I'm blaming the ovens, chef. [Gordon gives a shocked face]

Okay! I don't want to hear any more bullshit about the oven! I want each and every one of you to come to a consensus of two nominees up for elimination. I'm done! Hurry up!

Yes, chef.

Gabriel, let's go.

(interview) Even though I'm nervous, I still feel confident in my dish. [to the judges] Hello. How are you all?

Where's the rest of the lamb?

Yeah, uh...it's roasted rack of lamb. The sauce is, uh...

Can you just stop two seconds? [points to the kitchen] You gotta bring me the rest of the rack of lamb in the kitchen there. [as Gabriel runs back to get the rest of the lamb] Why would you put two chops on there?

I don't get it.

(interview) Gabriel freezes up at the last minute and thinks that he's pressed for time, so he just freaks out and doesn't put anything on the plate.

Why would you not put that on?

I was down to, like, one second. So, it was that one second to cut it or one second to take it off. I decided to make a professional decision and leave it off.

Forty-five minutes.

I understand, chef.

My instructions, every time we enter one of these challenges: Get your proteins on.

Yes, chef.

Should we get straight to tasting and forget the presentation?

[cuts into the smaller lamb chop] The lamb is actually overcooked.

Yeah, the lamb definitely does look like it's overcooked.

(to Gabriel) Did you slice and then re-sear?

I had to, chef. [Gordon facepalms] I put it back together, but I put it in, and then when I pulled it out, it...that's what I had.

Gabriel.

Yes?

That bit you left off...that we can't judge is cooked perfectly. And unfortunately, I'm struggling to give you a one.

Yes, chef.

Thank you. Back in line!

Yes, chef. [the scoreboard shows Gabriel at zero points]

[exhales deeply] Wow. Right now, I'm not too sure what I'm gonna put on the calendar.

(interview) Oh, no. I'm next. I'm–I'm the last one. Like, the situation just got so real. If I don't come through, that makes Chef Ramsay look bad because he put his faith in us.

[whispering to Joy] Joy, take it home.

Let's go, Joy, please. Thank you.

[to the judges] Hello.

Hi.

Alright, what have we got?

We have a seared duck breast, and on top of that are some oven-roasted figs and mushrooms...and some Swiss chard for your veggie.

What was your inspiration behind the dish?

[pause] Uh...my inspiration was actually just cooking things I never cooked before. I never cooked duck, never cooked Swiss chard. I don't eat blackberries.

Huh?

I ate a fig for the first time here.

So you cooked for us stuff you've never cooked before to get on the calendar?

Damn!

Seriously? Fuck me. [slaps Rochelle's black jacket]

(interview) I'm gonna get my black jacket! It's right there in the center, I can see it! It's so pretty!

Uh, let's go. Paul.

Aesthetically, the dish looked amazing. The whole dish itself eats very well. There's balance, you get the acidity. I like it a lot.

Thank you.

Rock, how was that?

Flavor from top to bottom, it looked beautiful. The balance with that fruit...that's absolutely amazing.

Thank you.

Nice. Dana, what do you think?

I think this is the first dish that I've tasted and said, "Wow, this is delicious."

Rock, give us a number, please. One to five.

I'm just gonna go with a five.

Wow! Wow, wow, wow. Paul, one to five, please.

I'm gonna go five.

Wow. Dana.

I'm gonna give it a five also.

Thank you!

I thought the dish was delicious. I'm gonna give it a four. Great job, well done.

Thank you, thank you! (interview) You know, thank you, chef. But I already got my black jacket! [laughs]

Nineteen out of twenty! [Joy runs up and hugs Kashia]

Nice job, Joy!

Oh, my God. Gabriel!

Yes, chef?

Why have you got a salmon and a halibut in the same pan? TALK TO ME, PLEASE!

I'm just searing it so I don't--

Come here you! One's braised, one's--

I'm just doing the sear first right now.

I don't want them! One's an oily fish, one's a white fish!

Yes, chef.

They need to be separate!

(interview) Oh, my God. That is like a fucking NO-NO!

Twelve services, we've never done it like that. You are not going to start.

I'm not chef.

One day, if you're lucky enough to open up your own business, then you teach that bad practice!

Fuck, man!

Garnish for the halibut, please? I'll take, I'll take!

Garnish needs about 90 seconds to finish these shrimp off.

Walking with the halibut. [brings her halibut to the pass]

[throws his spoon away] I need the garnish for the halibut before the halibut! Shit!

I know, chef.

Well if you know, why doesn't Joy know?

What?! What am I...? I don't understand what you're saying!

OK, come here! Come here. I would like the garnish... look at me. Look at me!

Chef, I--

Can I finish my sentence? Plain English: I would like the garnish for the halibut, before the halibut.

Chef, I just... I... I...

Yes or no! You want to pick an argument? I'm ready!

(walking away) Can I finish cooking, chef?

Hey, young lady! If you're in a mood, don't take it out on my food.

(throws her cooking cloth away) I'm done.

You're done?!

Leave me alone, leave me alone.

Joy, stop.

Fuck you. I'm done with this shit. [removes her apron, throws it aside and leaves the kitchen]

Joy, no! Joy, come here!

Oh my God.

She left. She left, she walked off.

And he went chasing after her. I've never seen anything like this.

What a selfish attitude! One thing wrong and you run away. Absolutely phenomenal.

I'm trying to tell you--

No, you're not telling me!

You're not even listening to me! I'm--

No, you're not! You're arguing! You're arguing, you're shouting...

I'm done!

Hey, I know you're done. It shows in your cooking.

Okay, fine. Fuck you. (returns to the dorms)

Get out! Unbelievable. Fucking unbelievable.

So did that really happen?

I guess.

(laughs) I think we wrecked this place by ordering halibut!

(interview) I can't believe what was just happening. She just blew it. Over a fish. (in the kitchen) I don't understand that. (interview) Chicks, man.

She'd better not give up.

No, she'd better not. (interview) I'm just like "Please, walk back in with Chef!" [Gordon returns to the kitchen alone; Melanie and Rochelle look dismayed] (interview) But... no! No!

Melanie!

Yes, chef.

On the fish station, please.

Yes, chef.

And, excuse me! Everybody!

Yes, chef?

That is not the attitude I expect at this stage of the game, let me tell you!

[tastes spinach brought by Sandra] COME ON! This is bitter and there is no salt in this!

Fuck.

Come on! [drops spoon in Sandra's pot] Make it better!

(to Sandra) Add more salt quickly! (interview) Sandra, get your shit together! If I was running that kitchen tonight, I would've thrown her pan, ripped off her apron, and made her get the fuck out of the kitchen. Like, how has Jason not done that?

(to Gordon) It's not just falling apart. This is going too slow, but this is the last table, and...

Well, wake up.

What is going on with the garnish here?! This is not that hard!

(to Sandra) Is there an answer there or not?

(sighs) Fuck me.

It's like talking to a fucking brick wall.

Come on!