Jake quotes from Hannah Montana

Jake

Jake Ryan doesn't faint. Leslie, on the other hand, is a little woozy.

Jake

I'm really not a bad guy. Besides, you're the only one in school who hasn't been falling all over me and...I kinda like that. Plus, you're cute.

Miley

You really think I'm cute? [quickly] Not that I care.

Jake

Plus it was kind of cool that you did all that just to make me jealous.

Miley

Whoa, whoa, slow down ego-boy, why would I try to make you jealous? Besides, you have a girlfriend.

Jake

Holly? She's not my girlfriend. We have a movie coming out, so we've been hanging out as a publicity thing.

Miley

Why didn't you tell me that before?!

Jake

Ah...well...I think I....

Miley

Wait a minute...you were trying to make ME jealous.

Jake

Was not.

Miley

Was too... Admit it, Jake, you like me!

Jake

No! You like me- just say it.

Miley

No, you say it.

Jake

No, you.

Miley

No, YOU!

Miley

Willis drinks it black.

Jake

Holly drinks a latte.

Miley

Willis shaves.

Jake

Holly waxes.

Miley

Willis is a senior.

Jake

[trying to keep a strait face] Wow...

Miley

Toodles!

Jake

Except for this wig. It's worse than the one I wore in Teen BigFoot. "The only thing bigger than his feet-"

[in unison] Was his-

Oliver

[suddenly waking up] WAS HIS HEART!

Miley

Thanks for letting me cut in line, sweetie. My boyfriend had his tonsils out, he can barely talk.

Jake

Honey, what's taking so long?

Miley

(nervously) Did I say tonsils? I meant kidneys!

(angrily) My mom has a taser. ZZZTTT!

Jake

(waiting for a order of ice cream in a bout of severe impatience) How do people do this? IT'S AGONY! How long have we been here?

Oliver

Well, in one minute, it will be exactly...a minute and a half.

Hannah

You're not dating Hannah, you're dating Miley! You can't get caught cheating on me with me!

Jake

Huh?

Hannah

Keep up, movie star. Ain't rocket science.

Miley

Lilly why do you read that tabloid trash, it's nothing but lies...

Lilly

[reading tabloid] Hannah Montana looks fabulous...

Miley

...with the occasional glimmer of truth.

Lilly

You didn't let me finish. [reading tabloid] ...too bad she's really a guy!

Miley

You have got to be kidding me!

Lilly

I can't believe you didn't tell me! [gasps] You slept over my house! [gasps] You borrowed my bras!

Miley

Hey I look good in a mustache. Oh yeah, I would totally date me.

Lilly

Me too.

[in unison] Awkward!

Lilly

Oh oh.

Miley

Let me guess, it's another article about Jake Ryan isn't it.

Lilly

It says his movie is done and he's back in town for the premiere.

Miley

Big whack, I don't need some guy who kisses me knowing that he's about to leave for 6 months and do some stupid movie.

Miley

Jake could fall out of the sky wearing a tuxedo and I wouldn't care.

Lilly

Um, Miley?

Miley

I'm serious. He could come down, giving me a dozen roses and it would make no difference. Zero! Zilch! El zippo!

Lilly

What if he got on his knees and begged you to take him back?

Miley

Like that's ever gonna happen.

Jake

Sorry it's only one rose, but I did bring chocolates.

Lilly

Not just chocolates. chocolates from the sky!

Miley

Jake, I don't know what to say, so I guess I'll just show you how I feel! (Pours her smoothie on him)

Lilly

(Grabs the chocolates and walks away) Thank you!

Miley

Thanks! Another basket from Jake. What a surprise!

Robby

I agree Mile, you either date this boy Jake, or tell him to send a work-out tape, cuz I'm one muffin away from my easy fit jeans

Miley

I got two words for yeh, Will power

Robby

I got two words for you, Mini jellys. Mhh I am so weak.

Lilly

Look who was waiting in the drive way.(Holding a cardboard cutout of jake) You can almost hear him say: Miley take me back, give me one more chance!

Miley

Oh, I'll give you something.

Robby

Not the chocolate chip ones, use the bran, nobody eats those.

Lilly

Oh my dad does, he calls them nature's broom. Uh, peanut butter balls.

Miley

Hello! Guys, this jerk hurt me and he's not gonna win me back with peanut butter balls.

Robby

Ok, you're right darling. I'm getting rid of everything. Mhh and I'll start by grilling up these perfect marinade T-bones.

Lilly

Medium rare please.

Robby

Got it.

Lilly

Come on Miley, the poor guy has done just about everything , what else can he do?

Miley

You're never gonna stop are you.

Jake

Miley, You've dumped stuff on me, and you've yelled at me, the one thing you haven't done is tell me that you don't care about me, tell me that and I'll go away.

Lilly

No, you can't, he's so and you, I mean, come on.

Jake

I know I kissed you then left and I'm sorry, but I never stopped thinking about you.

Lilly

Oh he never stopped and now I mean come on. I'll just go help with the steaks.

Miley

You do that.

Lilly

(Talking to the cardboard cutout of Jake)Come on Jake'rs

Miley

Ok, I never stopped thinking about you either.

Jake

Then you'll give me another chance?

Miley

How about we start with tonight?

Jake

Uh, Slight problem, tonight's my movie premiere.

Miley

Oh, That's ok, I mean, it's a little more public than I wanted but eh.

Jake

No no no no, eh, see the thing is.

Miley

You already have a date don't you.

Jake

It's not a real date ok, it's with my co-star ok, we just have to pretend that we're dating for the press, you know.. A kiss or too, but it doesn't mean anything.

Miley

Nothing you say ever means anything. You're the same jerk you were six months ago, only now, you're a jerk with a headache.

Jake

I don't have a... Oh no.

Miley

(Hits him with his shield) Oh yes!

Jake

Oh well thanks Brian, We're both really exited about this movie aren't we honey?

We sure are Jakey.

Jake

I'm a nobody. Like Oliver!

Oliver

Brilliant! ...Hey!

Miley

[to Jackson] My life is complicated enough. The last thing I need in my life right now is more drama.

Jake

Hi, Miley.

Miley

[staring at Jake] Hellooooo, drama!

Miley

[closing the door] Hi.

Jake

You look great.

Miley

Oh, boy!

Jake

Listen, Miley, I…

Miley

I know I know. You haven't been able to forget about me. Your life feels empty without me. You see my face everywhere you look and you come back to say…

Jake

I just wanna be friends.

Miley

Big blonde sack o' drama say what?

Jake

Oh! Hey guys. Thanks for coming by.

Miley

No problem. We just wanted to wish you luck on your first day on filming because you know that is what friends do. That they are there for each other, they support each other…so where is Mikayla?

Jake

Umm, in makeup. Why?

Lilly

Oh, we just wanted to wish her luck. It's not that we are going to get her fired or anything.

Miley

You stink under pressure!

Lilly

Then stop putting me under pressure!