Robbie Ray quotes from Hannah Montana

[talking like Scooby-Doo] Rhat rup, Rackson?

You know, your Uncle Earl and I used to fight all the time. When he went away to college, it was the four saddest days of my life!

[To himself, after no one is helping him with the luggage] Don't anybody worry about helping me get through this door! I got it! Oh no, please, Mr. Stewart, can we help you with that luggage? Oh no, I guess I got it! Are you sure, sir? It looks awfully heavy! Oh no, y'all just enjoy your visit!

Jackson Rod Stewart! It's nine in the morning! I want your rear in gear, in your car, on your way to higher education in the next two MINUTES!

Miley

[about Johnny] He is so cute!

Honey, at your age, there's only two things that are cute. Squirrels and little puppy dogs. Whew. I tell you I hate wearing this thing. [takes off his fake mustache] It's like kissing your great Aunt Clara.

(shudder) Eww!

Hannah

This is incredible, all these fans and the store has even got a mannequin of me!

That’s not a mannequin, that’s a Hannahquin, Miss Montanaquin.

Hannah

Oh, no!

What, that was cute-aquin.

Hannah

No, I think my dad is shopping for my birthday present.

Oh, no, someone is gonna buy you something really expensive and cool. What ever will you do?

Hannah

No, Lilly, you don’t get it. As a dad, he knows everything, about everything. But as a shopper, well, let’s just say the alarm should go off when he comes in to the store.

[Looks at really ugly dress]

You’re right, all that dress needs is a sheep and a bonnet and you’re Little Bo Geek.

Hannah

I love him, but the man should not be allowed in the teen department with a credit card. Ugh, will someone please stop him.

Roxy

Stop who? Where. I’ll get him! [Tackles a man] He’s clean! Move along you’re blocking people here!

Miley

Mom always knew the right stuff to buy me. She had great taste. But dad. Oh, man, he has the taste of a month-old pickle.

Lilly

Look, no dad knows how to shop for a girl. You know what my dad gave me for my last birthday? A savings bond. You can touch it, you can feel it, but you can’t spend it. Pointless.

Miley

Well, I’d take a saving bond instead of one of these presents any day. Behold... the ghosts of holidays past. [Shows Lilly the dresses]

Lilly

I think I’m gonna be sick. I need a fashion magazine! Cool, hip, trendy... Okay, all better. I can’t believe you actually wore these in public.

Miley

Oh please, they never made it out of the house.

Miley! Let’s see that pretty birthday number.

Miley

[Spills tomato juice on her dress] Daddy does tomato juice stain?

Miley

[Throws spaghetti over her dress] Mamma mia! Thatsa bigga staina!

Jackson

You are a cruel cruel father.

Oh yeah? Would a cruel cruel father give you these? [takes two credit cards out]

Credit cards!

Miley

My very first credit card. Today I am woman [kisses her credit card]

And I am still a Dad and these cards are just used for emergencies only!

Here's your lunch, boy.

Jackson

Come on, Dad, this is stupid. Can I come back in the house?

No way. You smell worse than that week old sardine Uncle Earl found in his fat fold when he was looking for the remote.

Miley

[while catching her breath] Dad's not going anywhere for a while.

Jackson

How do you know?

Miley

While he was on the pay phone... [brings a gadget out] I pulled this out of his car. I don't know what it is, but...

Somebody stole my distributor cap!

Miley

But I'm guessing it's a distributor cap.

Don't hurt my heart, my itchy twitchy heart, no...herky jerky? No...

Jackson

You might wanna try 'Achy breaky'!

[Robbie is playing the guitar, the mailman rings the bell and Robbie opens the door] Robbie Stewart?

That would be me. Hey, first, tell me what you think of this. [sings] I'm super cute, super hot, I'm the girl you like a lot, I'm super super girl! I'm super super girl! [stops singing] What do you think?

I think you're super super weird!

The gardener loved it.

[Miley is driving her car; she has her driving test the next day.] You're doing good there bud, drivin' like a real pro. You might wanna slow down here just a touch. [thinks in his head] We're gonna die, we're gonna die!

Miley

No problem daddy, you're the boss. [thinks in her head] I know what I'm doing old man, stick a sock in it!

You're gonna ace that driver's test, just focus on the road and stay calm. [thinks in his head] I'm gonna throw up!

Miley

I will daddy, don't you worry the driver's license is practically already in my hands. [thinks in her head] And then I'll never have to drive with your parental paranoid butt again!

Jackson

Hey dad, look at this, I just found a picture of me when i was six months old, sweet, cuddly, and so so happy, and then you ruined it by having that little devil child.

You gotta learn to laugh at life's little difficulties, [door bell rings] Oh, and speaking of little difficulties, we have a house guest.

Rico

Hello roomies.

Jackson

[exclaims] No no no no, why why why why, [points at Rico] YOU YOU YOU YOU!

Jackson

[Rico is shaving his armpits, Robbie is going out while Jackson says] Please please take me with you, don't leave me alone with, [looks at Rico and says] that!

Rico

I got a big swim meet this weekend, you won't believe the difference it makes in the butterfly, [does the butterfly and shows his armpits] Yeah.

Sorry son, every man for himself.