TV show quotes
You're watching the Black-and-White-Period-Piece-Old-Lady-Boring-Movie Channel.
Kids, I can't find the remote and I refuse to stand up.
Stay tuned for the Friday Night Movie, "The Duchess Approves", starring Sturly Stempleburgess as 'The Duchess', and Grampton St. Rumpterfrabble as irascible coxswain Saunterblugget Hampterfuppinshire.
KIDS!
Ugghh... I'm never gonna eat or do anything ever again.
Hey, there's still some left.
Evil!
Well, I'm probably scarred for life.
Yeah, that was pretty crazy.
I think I'll go stare at a wall for a while and RETHINK EVERYTHING. Hey, next time we hang out, let's stay at the Mystery Shack. Okay?
Next time? Yah! Let's, let's hang out at the Shack! Yeah... [gets in the car, to himself] Next time... [gets in the car and sits next to Mabel]
OHHHHH... [sees the thing she wrote earlier] What kind of sick joke is this?
Not man enough? NOT MAN ENOUGH?! I have three Y chromosomes, six adams apples, pecs on my abs, and FISTS FOR NIPPLES!
No offense, Dipper, but you're not exactly Manly Mannington.
I am too Manly...Manny, or whatever it is you said.
Face the music, kid. You got no muscles, you smell like baby wipes, and let's not forget last Tuesday's incident.
[Flashback: Dipper is in the bathroom, in a towel, looking into the mirror and singing into his comb like a microphone]
Disco girl...comin' through...that girl is you! [Stan opens the bathroom door] DON'T COME IN, DON'T COME IN!
[End flashback]
[grinning] You were listening to girly Icelandic pop sensation BABBA?
No, I wasn't- It's not important.
Another fire hydrant destroyed. It's a gosh-dang mystery!
Wanna take our uniforms off and run around in circles?
Quit readin' my mind.
[serving Stan and Mabel] Food!
Thanks there, sugar pot. I-I mean honey wasp, kitten baby, b-baby cow.
Ha! Silly.. silly man...
What was that about?
Nothing. I don't want to talk about it. Talk about what? Why is this table wet?
Grunkle Stan, you are a cranky, gross, weird old man. But we're gonna get Lazy Susan to like you because nothing is stronger than the power of-
Love?
Mabel.
[Dipper confronts the Multibear.]
Child, why have you come here?
Multibear, I seek your head. Or, one of them, anyway. There's like...six? Six heads?
[All the clones are fighting]
Hey! Classic Dipper's getting away!
No friends, it's me, #7.
[They All Look at #7]
That's not me guys! THAT'S NOT ME!
[Dipper and Mabel go off to enjoy Pioneer Day]
Grunkle Stan, you coming?
No thank you. Just remember: if you two come back to the Shack talking like these people, you're dead to me.
[In an old-timey accent] There's a carpetbagger in the turnip cellar.
[Likewise] Well, hornswaggle my haversack.
[They spit on the ground and runoff, laughing]
DEAD TO ME!
[Stan attempts to drive away, but his car is stuck in the mud. He calls out to a man who is walking with a donkey.]
Hey you! Uh, Donkey Boy! Give me a hand with my car, will ya?
Here in 1863, I have never heard tell of a "car." Tell me, what is this magic wheel-box?
C'mon, Steve, you're a mechanic for Pete' sake! Cut me some slack!
"Slack?" I am unfamiliar with this bold new expression!
I can't take it anymore. [grabbing the man by the collar] I'm getting dumber every second I'm here!
[Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland run over, batons drawn]
Are we gonna have to intervene here?
Oh, look. The "constable!" What are you gonna do? Throw me in "ye stocks?" [laughs]
[Cut to Stan being locked in the stocks]
Oh, come on!
We're gonna have to break in.
[Spy music plays; cut to the twins just entering the museum normally]
And here are your balloons; blue and pink!
[Spy music plays again]
We're in.
If you're watching this, you are one of eight people in these United States with clearance to view this information. In fact, I myself will be shot once the filming is complete. [Someone speaks offscreen.] What? No? Ha! Well, that's a relief.
[Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland are chasing Dipper Mabel and Quentin Trembley across the top of a train after the three escaped from a crate]
There is .... No escape! [out of breath] I gotta take a knee.
Are you ok? Can I get you anything?
Edward Durland you are a diamond in the rough.
Sheriff Blubs do you really want to lock us all up in a government facility somewhere?
I got no choice. Our orders come from the very top.
Wait. Quentin did you ever sign an official resignation?
No sir. I ate a salamander and jumped out the window.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Gravity Falls pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
