Gossip Girl quotes

Nate

No offense, but don't you think you're a little outmatched?

Chuck

At squash? I've been playing my father since 8th grade, how good can Marcus be?

Nate

No, I mean as a guy. Blair wants to be a princess and your greatest achievement is owning part of a burlesque club.

Chuck

Which is why I have to get to know him. No one is that perfect. Once I get him outta the way, I'll have a clear shot with Blair.

Nate

You know it's love when you start talking like an assassin.

Chuck

I think you're jealous of my new best friend!

Nate

Well I have been hoping someone else would tag in for awhile.

Blair

Squash? I'll squash you.

Chuck

It's just a game, Blair.

Blair

Not to me, Basshole. I like him!

Chuck

So do I. And apparently he doesn't have too many friends.

Blair

[to Marcus] Don't worry. I'm well-versed in your lordly ways. And I'm ready to meet the queen... which I also just watched on DVD, BTW.

Serena

[to Dan] Okay. I will see you back in the city. Fully clothed. With lots of people around. Okay? We'll talk.

Dan

Yeah. About our problems.

Blair

[sees Nate and Catherine on the floor] Oh my effing God!

Cheers to that, Blair. Nothing says welcome home like a bottle of bubbly... or a scandal bubbling.

Dan

I can't believe Nate Archibald is a gigolo.

Vanessa

You can't tell anyone!

Dan

Who? Who would I tell? Except everyone I've ever met. [pauses] I won't.

Love may fade with the season, but some friendships are year round. Like you and me! You know you love me. XOXO, Gossip Girl.

[sees Blair and Chuck] ... Blair!

Blair

ohmigod, ohmigod.

Blair

You don't understand! I thought it was you! He had an accent!

Chuck

Please, you knew exactly who it was.

Looks like Lady B is determined to have it all. Question is... who with?

Blair

Not that it's any of your business, but Marcus and I have an amazing sex life.

Chuck

Really? [pauses] What names does he call you when you make love? Where does he put his hand? Does he ... [whispers] I want you, baby. Won't you come to me?...Have sex with me .

Blair

What?

Chuck

Just once, that's all I ask.

Blair

You are disgusting and I hate you.

Chuck

Then why are you still holding my hand?

Jenny

It looks like a pilgrim at a funeral. [pauses] I am so, so sorry.

Eleanor

You're absolutely right.

Jenny

I am?

Eleanor

Yes. Don't let it go to your head.

Chuck

I don't have a romantic bone in my body. Least of all that one. But you do raise an interesting idea. Clearly there's some kind of ... blockage.[Pauses] Perhaps ...

Serena

No!

Chuck

One more go-around, just to clear the pipes.

Serena

You are not using Blair as sexual Drano!

Nate

I told you that in confidence!

Catherine

You told me that in bed.

Spotted, a blonde shiny phoenix rising from the ashes of a major public humiliation. Welcome back Queen Serena! Consider us your humbled servants. Cause if looks could kill, we wouldn't want to be Dan Humphrey.