“Love and Rocket” · Season 4
In this episode: Bender (5), Planet Express Ship (5), Turanga Leela (4), Lrrr (2), Ndnd (2), Philip J. Fry (1), Professor Hubert Farnsworth (1), Zoidberg (1)
[Bender and Planet Express Ship are arguing over using tax money to fund controversial art.]
Would you censor the Venus de Venus just because you can see her spewers?
Ugh, it's filthy! Why not create a National Endowment for Strip Clubs while we're at it?!
Why not indeed?!
Bender! Ship! Stop bickering or I'm going to come back there and change your opinions manually!
I saw you at Elzar's with those two "ladies of the evening." Explain that.
Okay, I like a challenge. [thinks for a second] Ah! I got it. I'm going to be completely honest with you, Planet Express Ship. Those women you saw me with were my accountants.
Your accountants? Oh, I would dearly love to believe that were true. So I will!
Knowing which pickup lines fizzle, and which ones sizzle keeps us on the cutting edge of flirtation technology!
Is heaven missing an angel? Because you've got nice cans!
[Test subject eyes dummy in annoyance]
My two favorite things are commitment and changing myself.
[Test subject brings the dummy into a deep embrace]
Does that dummy have a brother?
What is this emotion you humans call "wuv?"
Surely it says "love."
No, "wuv," with an earth w. Behold!
This concept of "wuv" confuses and infuriates us!
You could have picked a better time to break up with the ship, Bender.
Ah, the moment felt right. Call me old-fashioned, but I like a dump to be as memorable as it is devastating.
Remember, we need to show these people that we are not bitter husks of human beings, who long ago abandoned hope of finding love in this lifetime. Leela, you'll have to do some acting.
Check.
This is ancient Earth's most foolish program. Why does Ross, the largest friend, not simply eat the other five?
Perhaps they are saving that for sweeps.
Oh, honey, look! The tapirs! It says here that the babies lose their pajama-like coat after their first year. Isn't that interesting, honey?
Yep, mind-numbingly interesting.
I'm afraid I can't do that, Leela.
[Inside Bender's compartment] Who are you talking to?
No one, baby. Lucy Liu is the only woman for Bender.
I love y... [Bender closes door on her]
[voice-over] As the candy hearts poured into the fiery quasar, a wondrous thing happened, why not. They vaporized into a mystical love radiation that spread across the universe, destroying many, many planets, including two gangster planets and a cowboy world. But one planet was exactly the right distance to see the romantic rays but not be destroyed by them: Earth. So all over the world couples stood together in joy. And me, Zoidberg. And no one could have been happier unless it would have also been Valentine's Day. What? It was? Hooray!
Look, I'm not saying Bender's not great, but have you ever considered that maybe, you know, he's not that great?
[scoffs] You're just jealous. No one loves you 'cause you're tiny and you're made of meat.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Futurama pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
