Daniel Desario quotes from Freaks and Geeks

Daniel

Rock 'n roll don't come from your brain. It comes from your crotch.

Daniel

I hate astrology. What, everybody born in the same month is gonna have the same life?

Daniel

These jocks think they're such badasses. Like they cured cancer or something.

Daniel

Greetings princess. It is I, Carlos the Dwarf. The dragon has been slain and you are free to rule your kingdom.

Daniel

You guys know Lindsay?

Nick

Yeah, you were in my English class last year. You were the chick that got an A, right?

Lindsay

Yeah, well, what are you gonna do?

Ken

I don't know. What are you gonna do?

Lindsay

Are you guys going to the homecoming dance?

Ken

Excuse me?

Lindsay

My dad's kinda makin' me go.

Nick

Your dad's makin' you go to the dance? What's that all about?

Ken

Who's your dad? Hitler?

Daniel

Knock it off, blondie. You're gonna blow the speakers.

Kim

Oh, I'm sorry, Grandpa. I'll try not to blow anything of yours from now on.

Ken

Would you quit it, you're making me sick!

Daniel

Why don't you make out with Nicky, and we'll call it a foursome?

Ken

Yeah, why don't you make out with my butt, and we'll call it love?

Daniel

Lindsay... I think it's really great that you and Nick are going out.

Lindsay

Yeah. Me too.

Daniel

No, I mean it. Nick's a great guy. We give him a hard time, but you know... he's the man. I just think it's really great you guys are going out. He's a really great guy.

Lindsay

Yeah, I know.

Daniel

Nick's a stud. You know? I mean, he may not seem like it, but he is.

Mr. Desario, don't you have something to do?

Daniel

Right, but I thought we were going to do that after class, Ms. Yeats.

Oh, be still my beating heart.

Daniel

[whispers to Lindsay] I like that dress.

Nick

Hey, man, I heard Kim got an A on her world civ test. That's great. Oh, no, that's right, that was MY girlfriend. Ohhh...

Daniel

That's really funny.

Nick

Oh, you know what though? Lindsay got detention for flipping off her gym teacher. Oh no, that's right, that was YOUR girlfriend. Oh ho ho...

Daniel

I heard Kim punched you in the chest really hard. Oh, whoops, that was me. [Daniel punches Nick.]

Nick

That was really hard.

Daniel

Am I a loser?

You're not a loser because you're having sex. But if you weren't having sex, we could definitely debate the issue.

Kim

Check out the pizza-face dork with the trombone! Why doesn't he just pop those things?

Daniel

I think if he did, he'd die of blood loss.

Daniel

All right, fine, I'll be a dwarf, but my name is Carlos.

Bill

Carlos the dwarf?

Daniel

Yeah, you got a problem with that, Gorthon?