It's like I'm literally burning money!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Eat flames, you dipwads! Bathe in my punishing fire!
[Gary shoots the Lord Commander with a blaster]
You took so much from me.
And you, me.
We lost Avocato from that bomb you sent.
Did you now? [laughs] Lovely.
[Gary shoots the Lord Commander again in the leg]
AGH! Will you quit shooting me!?
But, we were able to go back in time and fix a few things. And, we motherlovin' saved him.
Avocato is an unstable compound. With the right push, you'll see what he's really made of.
That's great. But it's time to kill you. And everything that has come to pass doesn't happen. Quinn, the Earth... everything.
[Suddenly, the Lord Commander is pulled up by his ship. Gary starts shooting, but keeps missing.]
NO! NO! NO! NO!
How do we get Avocato to recover his memory?
On my planet, if you forgot something, they'd tie you up and beat you with pain-sticks until you remembered! And you did. You always did.
They don't care about you. They're dragging you down.
You're not Gary, are you?
Aw, what gave it away?
Your vessel is stronger than this one. I'll take you instead!
(In Avocato's mind) He stole your son away from you, turned him against you. Kill him. Kill him!
(In Avocato's mind) LIES! ALL LIES! KILL HIM!
Rats! You were so close! So close to death! NO!
What are you doing with all my stuff?!
Dividing it up. So rude of you to survive like this!
I was going to take your big thumper, Gary.
You don't say?
[putting a hand over his heart] And put it with the rest of my collection. Don't worry, you're the only heart. The rest are spleens.
[pushes her away nervously] I'm... honored?
Well, this is ridiculous! Carnivolo is a holiday I invented for my own glorification! And you're bringing me diet juice drinks, a cheapo homemade greeting card, and now we're getting stingy on the lavishment?!
It's not about what they brought, Dad. They're... family.
They are-- We are?
Yeah! Why don't you lavish some praises, Pop-Pop? Dump a hot steamin' load of lavish all over Gary's face!
[uncomfortably] No. That doesn't sound... no.
Hey, Ash, you coming? We're going after the keys.
I need to watch my brother. He's all the family I have left. You know the saying. "If you love someone, throw them in a well, and if they drown, they were never yours to begin with."
Nope, 'cause that's not a saying.
[impaled through the shoulder] Ugh, you little bastard!
Yep, it's me. It's the little bastard. And you're my mom. Let that sink in for a second. Have you got it? All right? Parent-teacher conferences? Baking cookies? Not crazed rampages on your boy!
You caught me on an off-day.
An "off-day"? I've never seen an on-day! I'm done being the excuse for all your mistakes! Things went the way they did with Dad because of you! You did that! And you're gonna have to live with it! [jumping] Yes! I've always wanted to say that. That is... gah! All right, let's, uh...
[He looks back at Sheryl, who has tears in her eyes, and after a moment of consideration, starts tugging on the blade in her shoulder]
Oh, that is in there...
What are you doing, Gary?
We'll bring her back to the ship. [finally pulls it out]
Why?
Because... she's my mom.
And?
I'm gonna let you knock her out.
Thanks.
Yo! Bolo!
BBolo
Gary, have you obtained the dimensional keys?
We have. But! Before we get to that, real quick, I need to know something - you playing us? My mom was contacted by a buddy of yours. Does the Titan Oreskis ring any bells?
BBolo
Oreskis? Not that guy?!
Yeah, that guy.
BBolo
[growls] Frickin' dickbag! And that was before his mind got poisoned. He is not to be trusted.
Hey, we're not sure you can be trusted.
He says you're evil and you're gonna destroy a bunch of important crap if you're freed.
BBolo
He said that?! Did he also tell you that he seduced my first love, Jill, and gave her a raging case of upipiums?!
Upipiums? The hell is that?
BBolo
The worst! Makes you leak actual lava out of your peehole.
Oh... that is horrifying.
BBolo
The cranberry pills only made it worse!
Oh, I don't know how we're gonna get out of this!
Oh jeez, if only you had the best pilot in the universe. Oh, wait, you do. Sorry I'm late, love. By about, what? 30 years?
32 years, but hey, who's counting?
You are, obviously.
Sweetheart? Is the space demon still following us?
YOUR SOUL WILL FALL SHACKLED TO THE HORROR OF AN INFINITE NIGHTMARE!!!
Yes it is!
BBiskit
... Kevin Van Newton.
Whoa! Papa Kev? He's the one who created me Gary. He created your best friend. Which is me, KVN. KVN, KVN, KVN...
Quinn, I've finally found him. The father of Beelzebub. This house... must be cleansed... with FIRE!
We got to burn it to the ground, Quinn.
KVKevin Van Newton
I give to you the Bearded Turkey Wing.
No, NO! I wanted to name it! I had a name all picked out.
What was it Gary? Tell me. Tell me. [starts poking Gary] You gonna tell me? Tell me.
The Dragon Hawk 5. What do you guys think?
Let's go with the Galaxy 2.
Oh, aw, man. Life is a graveyard of dead dream.
BBolo
The fortress of the Titan Oreskis.
Chookity?
BBolo
Yes! It's time for revenge! This dickbag stole my first love, Jill. And for that, we murder him! Oreskis, show yourself! I know you know the sound of my voice!
OOreskis
[emerges] Bolo. I see your dimensional keys did the trick of freeing you, old friend.
BBolo
"Old friend"?! You left me to rot within that prison for eons!
OOreskis
You betrayed your kind.
BBolo
You've been blinded by Invictus.
OOreskis
No, old friend. My eyes are clear. You just failed to be inspired.
BBolo
You know why I've come.
OOreskis
Is this about Jill?
BBolo
Hell yeah, it's about Jill! Has she mentioned me?
OOreskis
Maybe she has... maybe she hasn't.
BBolo
You die now! And when I'm done, I will kill Invictus.
[Oreskis notices Mooncake hovering near Bolo's shoulder]
OOreskis
You must be the "Mooncake".
Pok!
OOreskis
We've heard so much about you. You're very, very special.
[uneasily] Umm...
BBolo
Enough! Let the fight begin!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Final Space pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.