Tom quotes from Father Ted

Tom

(about the rabbits) I could run them down in me van!

Father Ted

Yes, Tom?

Tom

I've killed a man.

Father Ted

(nonchalantly) Did you, Tom? I'll have to talk to you about that later. I'm going to do an interview for the television!

Father Ted

(as Tom comes out of the Post Office with money, to the sound of a robbery alarm and a gunshot) Ya haven't been up to your auld tricks again, have ya?

Tom

No, Father. 'Tis my money. I just didn't want to fill out the forms.

Father Ted

That's a very nice sword. Where exactly are you going to put the rabbits?

Tom

In the vice, father.

Tom

Have you nothing I could kill at all all, Father?

Father Ted

Uh no Tom, no.

Tom

Well, feck it anyway!

Father Ted

Run Dougal, run quite fast!