A character in Entourage
5th most-quoted character in Entourage: in 32 of its 195 quotes
Most scenes with: Vince (10), Turtle (9), Johnny Drama (8)
[The doorbell rings at Vince's new house]
Who is it?
Delivery. [E opens door to reveal Bob Saget] Hey, welcome to the neighborhood.
Bob Saget.
[sees Vince pass by and gives goods to E] Hey there, Aquaman himself. Been reading about you all morning. [shakes hands with Vince] I live right next door Vin. I'm a big fan. So are my daughters, but do me a favor: don't fuck 'em. Don't you ever fuck my daughters.
[At an X-Box Fight Night tournament, Turtle submits his fake urine sample for drug testing.]
Where do I take the test?
The what?
The drug test. I jacked two bottles of water in the car for this, so can we just get over with this please?
This is X-Box, loser, not the Olympics. We don't get drug tests. If we do, we'd be out of business, idiot. [gang heckles Turtle]
Sucker!
Nice, Turtle.
[laughs and holds sample] What the fuck do I do with this now!!?
Drink it.
[Just before the Queens Boulevard premiere, Vince and E see Turtle and Drama try ignore each other]
Come on Drama, what are you thinking, bro?
[brushes off Turtle] Don't talk to me, Turtle. I can't hear you, I can't see you, I don't even wanna know you.
You're yelling, alright?
What's your problem, Drama?
Me and Drama had a little incident.
What kind of incident?
Don't fucking say it, man.
No no, say it.
[long pause] We accidentally crossed swords.
Eww, really?
Really? [laughs] Were there any women in there, at least?
Yeah, dick, it was a threesome. It's no biggie, crossing is an occupational hazard.
[At the San Diego Comic Con, E and Turtle has failed to convince RJ Spencer to drop his plans to slam Vince over his website]
[seeing Spencer walk away upon being threatened by Turtle] What the fuck is his problem?
He hates Vince. He's gonna trash him on his website, saying he's gonna make a shitty Aquaman.
Why? Vince would make an adorable Aquaman.
You should tell him that.
Yeah sweetie, you should. If Aquaman is in trouble, and the fate of the land and all mankind is in his hands, he should unleash the power of the pussy.
Don't bullshit me, tough guy. If I do it, I'll do it because I like Vince.
[E is calling Ari about the blackouts and tells him where they are]
We're in Northridge, the whole area's blacked out. Is this gonna affect the numbers?
I did not even know that Northridge survived the '94 quake, E.
[Vince has just seen Ari crash the pool party the gang is in and he is worried about Aquaman's opening-day numbers]
What are they projecting, 45?
One-sixteen, actually.
What?
One-sixteen, kid!
How is that possible?
You guys ever hear of a hanging chad? [crowd is clueless] Where the fuck am I? Listen, the biggest thing the blackouts affected were the actual reporting of the numbers.
[stunned] We beat Spider-Man?
Well, it's only Friday, but if there isn't a tornado in the Midwest, I think we got a good goddamn shot my friend. [to crowd] Hey everybody, [points to Vince] you got the biggest movie star on the planet on your roof right now. [crowd cheers]
[In the kitchen, E, Turtle, and Drama are hearing the loud voices of a girl having sex with Dom]
You hearing this guy, E?
I hate being seen over here with this guy, Drama.
It's hysterical. [Drinks coffee]
Hysterical's waking up at 5am thinking somebody's been murdered.
Guy's been out of commission for five years, he's making up for lost time.
[checks watch after girl reaches orgasm] Couple of minutes more he would have had my record beat.
[Ari has called E early in the morning]
So, we had an offer?
No, we got a problem.
Oh, don't tell me that Ari, not today. You said you were sure.
I was. I just got off the phone with Rubenstein's people. Somebody robbed his house at the party last night.
What?
Stole the original Shrek doll right out of its apparently-impossible-to-break-into case.
Jesus.
Cops are all over. I don't want to tell you E, but if this comes up smelling bad for us, you can kiss Bogota goodbye.
Why would it come bad for us?
I'm thinking about your new housemate, E.
Ari, there were 300 people there.
WELL, 299 OF 'EM DIDN'T SERVE TIME!
[Ari tries one last gamble to retain Vince as his client after he discovers Vince looking at other agencies. It flops.]
Vince, what are you doing?
Ari, I didn't need the whole dog-and-pony show. I really thought you were different from everyone else.
Vince, I am.
Ari, you do things your own way and you don't give a shit what we think about it.
I do give a shit. You should have seen me today begging and pleading to get that movie back, but it's gone. The past is the past, let's look to the future.
You're unreal. I mean, even after you fuck up like this, you can't even muster the strength to just, as my friend, look me in the face and say "I'm sorry."
That's all you wanted?
That's all I wanted.
Then I'm sorry, Vin.
It's too late.
Vince...
Ari, you're fired.
[to Turtle and Drama] Let's roll.
[Having sold the house Vince bought with his Aquaman bonus, the gang does one more thing before they go]
[notices others just getting in their vehicles] Hey guys! The house - get over here. Say goodbye.
Goodbye, house.
[Billy Walsh has just read the Medellin script]
VINNY!!!
Yo.
Vincent!
Talk to me, what?
Pablo Escobar? Pablo fucking Escobar!?!? [goes up staircase] I've always wanted to make a movie about this guy since I read a story about him blowing up that airliner. I love Pablo Escobar.
So you like the script?
What, was I not just fucking clear?
Can you do it for 25 million?
I don't see why not. I need to talk to the financier.
No problem.
I love it, Vince. Thank you. We're gonna win you an Oscar.
[The final scene of Medellin has completed its first and only take]
Cut! [walks to E] Start off, suit, I need another one. [E is flabbergasted] Ahh, I'm fucking with you, it was perfect! [crew cheers]
[surveying aftermath] Guys, we did it.
Yeah, who would've thought that two kids from Queens could have pulled this off, but we did, it's gonna be fucking amazing.
You know, I've never felt so good about a movie after making this one. I know it.
Billy, think you've made a good film?
[looks to narrator] Hey, it's gonna be a genius or its gonna fucking suck. 'Til I see the first cut, I have no idea, but you know what? Neither does anybody else.[walks away. Vince, E, and Turtle wonder about what he just said.]
[E has just seen a trailer for Medellin at Billy Walsh's post-production lab]
Wow, this looks great.
Yeah, if only the movie looked so good.
What?
I didn't say anything. [turns off editing machine and leaves]
[E and Anna Faris are on the phone.]
You know that we've been on the phone for like, 97 minutes?
Well, I needed something to pass the time before the Pussycat Dolls comes on.
You're obsessed, you know that?
Hey, some people have drugs or alcohol in times of sadness, I have reality TV.
[Ari and E talk about the potential of the Nine Brave Souls script, now called Smokejumpers]
Small people think small, so I can't totally blame you for that. But anyone with half a sense of the business would have read it and known, okay, you got a script that's well-written about the greatest fire in Oregon history for 90 pages and you never see it. Live inside that fire for 50 pages, boom, home run.
Now it's Ed Norton's home run, you jerk-off.
Well, did they sell the script, you cunt face?
Not yet, dick head.
Then it's still free, you overpaid undersized bitch.
You want a go? Seriously, let's just go right here.
Ari GoldJeremy Piven · 87 quotes
Johnny DramaKevin Dillon · 60 quotes
TurtleJerry Ferrara · 51 quotes
VVince37 quotes
EricKevin Connolly · 26 quotes
LloydRex Lee · 16 quotes
AMrs Ari14 quotes
Billy WalshRhys Coiro · 10 quotes
Dana GordonConstance Zimmer · 5 quotes
Scott LavinScott Caan · 5 quotes
SloanEmmanuelle Chriqui · 5 quotes
ShaunaDebi Mazar · 4 quotes
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Entourage pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
Entourage · 195 quotes