Ed Season 3 quotes

Ed

[to Mike, describing his moment with Carol] That was a movie kiss, a movie kiss my friend! I was Humphrey Bogart and Cary Grant rolled up into one.

Warren

[watching Kenny bowl towards 300] A chance to witness perfection. Last time I did that, I was doing shirtless sit ups in the mirror.

Kenny

[using his senile great-grandfather`s parting words] I'll see ya when I see ya unless I see ya when I see ya.

Phil

[as Ed departs with an irate Carol] My man Bosco's about to get a good ole fashioned ass chewin'.

[at the midnight duel for Carol] On the count of three, you and I are gonna start pounding the crap out of each other with these cricket bats.

Warren

[about Carol] She's so bootylicious as a middle aged woman, I tremble to think how she must've been when she was young.

Ed

[about Carol] I kissed her, right? Plant the ole seeds of doubt? She fought it all summer and now she can't fight no mo'.

I like being a loser because we can brood and feel things deeply and make fun of the winners.

Warren

[to Ed] Right up until you nailed that hot DA a couple years ago, I thought you were as gay as a French horn.

Carol

[to Ed, on his denial of her engagement] I am desperate for you to accept that...because if you don't, it's the end of us.

Mike

I'm thrilled you seem to have gotten over Carol. I'm concerned that you seem to have fallen in love with a man.

Phil

[about Eli] Look at him squirm now that the chair's on the other foot...or should I say ass?

Phil

[on Eli's forfeit] I've enjoyed a lot of victories in my life but for some reason, this one is particularly sweet.

[to Ed] I didn't find happiness on the road...I was happy before I left.

Warren

That's why God put me here, assuming there is a God and he puts people places.