Ed quotes from Ed, Edd n Eddy

Ed

1, 2, tie my shoe! 3, 4, shut the door! 5, 6, pick up sticks! 7, 8, lay them straight! 9, 10, a big fat hen! 11, 12...

Eddy

Ed! [Ed is hit 3 times and wakes up] Get up, stupid! We're wasting time!

Eddy

[answering the telephone] Hello? [gets sprayed]

Edd

Oh, look Ed. A Skunk. Did you know in some parts it's also known as a polecat?

Ed

Who stepped on a duck?

Eddy

I say we test it.

Edd

Test it?

Ed

Like, mustard?

Ed

[eating one of Edd's shoes] How long have you been a size 2?

Edd

Size 2? But I've always worn a size 5 shoe, doctor.

Eddy

Sounds like another symptom to me.

Eddy

Do something, will ya?

Edd

I know just to do, Eddy. I little dab of soap will do the trick.

Ed

And I'll go fetch the Kankers since they’re are whizzes at stuck fingers.

Eddy

NO, WAIT! ED!

Ed

Come out, come out, wherever you are

Eddy

This is your fault! Admit it! If you do, I promise not to leave bruises.

Kevin

Hey, you lovebirds, vamoose. Babysitting's over, 'cause I just scored big time. Later.

Ed

You forgot to say 'dorks,' Kevin.

Eddy

Did you see Kevin's pockets? They're bursting with cash, I tell ya.

Edd

Let's hope for Kevin's sake those stitches don't tear. Wouldn't it be a shame if he were to lose that plentiful peck of pennies?

Eddy

Yep.

Edd

Yep? Is that all you have to say for yourself? Yep? No rash, nonsensical quip to defraud Kevin of his fortune?

Eddy

Scam Kevin. That's what he said, right? I'm way ahead of you, Sockhead. Here's the plan, boys.

Eddy

Hey monobrow, give me a push will you?

Ed

Can do, Eddy! But I cannot join you in your merriment for I am responsible for Plank's mommy and daddy. Hey, hold it one darn second there.

Eddy

This is all your fault. They're all just hunks of wood, for Pete's sake.

Edd

I wouldn't say that too loudly, Eddy. I think they're watching us.

Ed

Make them go away, Double D! Make them go away!

Eddy

Man, this is stupid.

Old Eddy

What happened to us, Double D? We look like turkeys.

Old Edd

Calm down, Eddy. I'll let you shuffle.

Old Eddy

I hate cribbage. I'm just a kid.

Old Edd

[chuckles] Kid? Oh, Eddy. We haven't been kids in over 90 years.

Old Eddy

90 years?!

Old Ed

Baby go wee-wee. [he and Edd laugh]

Eddy

What's this about you givin' stuff away? How am I supposed to compete with that?

Edd

My school supplies! Gone! Pillaged! Plundered! It can't be! IT CAN'T BE!

Edd

A highlighter pen?" "How am I supposed to take notes with a highlighter...

Ed

"Double D, can I have your hat?"

Edd

Oh sure, why not! Why would I need a hat when school is now totally out of the question! Wait! You still have it, don't you? From your parents, yes? The back-to-school-sale coupon?

Ed

Haven't got a clue what you're talking about, Double D. All I got is a back-to-school-sale coupon from my parents.

Eddy

That stupid thing's worthless! The signs are as clear as the gap in your teeth, sock-head. School ain't meant to be. 'Cause it's Summer baby!

Eddy

Oh puh-leeze.

Ed

Sounds good to me, whatever you just said!

Edd

Quickly, Ed! We have shopping to do!

Eddy

Oh c'mon, guys! Forget school, will ya? SUMMER AIN'T OVER!

Edd

What are you doing to that poor defenseless dictionary?

Eddy

Ed's cramming for the spelling bee. [Eddy stuffs pages into Ed's ears] Feeling smarter, Ed?

Ed

[spewing out loose sheets as he speaks] What?

Edd

Have you ever had one of those days, Ed?

Ed

Every day of my life, Double D.

Ed

This Bubble Bathbel is a smart guy.

Eddy

It's Bobby Blabby, idiot.

Kevin

Better spill the beans, Mr. Editor, or you're paper pulp.

Edd

I have no idea what you're talking about.

Kevin

Who wrote this stuff?

Edd

Miniature aliens? Hairy legs? Lost cities and spandex bicycle shorts? Who indeed is this Bobby Blabby? Eddy? Care to explain?

Eddy

What? Uh... couldn't tell ya. Sounds like a jerk.

Ed

You dropped your loot, Bibby Boo-boo.

Eddy

IT'S BOBBY BLABBY! GET IT RIGHT! Oops.

Eddy

Hey! Let me go! Untie me!

Ed

I found him the science cupboard pretending to be a stuffed beaver, Double-D.

Edd

The nurse thanks you, Eddy.

Eddy

Oh Yeah? What for?

Edd

For helping Kevin conquer his fear of needles by allowing him to witness the safe and easy administration of a real booster shot.

Eddy

Oh no you don't! Not me!

Ed

Worry not, little man. Because you get to have a lollypop after.

Eddy

Mommy.

Kevin

Sweet.

Eddy

But... No! Don't do it! I'm too young!

Ed

Needle!?

Eddy

I hate Needles!