DennisA present for Protestants. Ah, now my next Protestant gift delivery isn’t due to arrive until Wednesday. And as it stands, I’m completely out of stock, what with there being such a high fucking demand for that sort of thing around these parts.
How much for the Subbuteo, Dennis?
Dennis
We’ll call it 16 quid.
Dennis
No, we fucking couldn’t.
How about we give you the £1.76 and we pay the rest off in installments?
Yeah. Which would be what? £3.56 over four weeks?
Dennis
Jesus, check out Rain Wean.
Or, you could give us the Subbuteo, and then we could work off the debt.
Yeah, we could do chores and stuff.
Dennis
Chores? What do you think this is? Little House on the fucking Prairie?
Do you watch Little House on the Prairie, Dennis?
Dennis
GET OUT!
Dennis
That’ll be £1.99.
Dennis
Is there some sort of a problem here, girls?
Not a problem, as such. More of a-a-a question, really.
Dennis
You think I’m here to answer questions, do you? Who am I, Magnus fucking Magnusson?
He doesn’t answer questions, he asks them.
Dennis
Pipe the fuck down.
It’s just, it’s pink, white and purple, Dennis.
Dennis
So?
Well, it should be red, white and blue.
Dennis
Says who?
There’s also quite a few stars missing.
Dennis
No, there’s not.
There’s only 30 stars here. I mean, there should be 50, just because the stars represent states, so…
Dennis
Some of them left.
Dennis
That’s right.
Some states left America?
Dennis
Yep.
Dennis
The other day.
I don’t know, I just feel like if 20 states left the USA, we might have heard about it.
Dennis
Ah, they didn’t want to make it into a big thing. So these are the new, modern, up-to-date flags. They’ve just brought them out.
Okay. It’s just, well, I’m not convinced that’s actually true.
Dennis
Well, why would I lie?
Because you bought a fuckload of dud flags, and you’re trying to get rid of them.
Dennis
GET OUT!
(exiting the shop) What first attracted him to a career in retail, do you think?
Derry Girls · 94 quotes
