Warrick Brown quotes from CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

Sara

Hey. (the alarm continues to ring annoyingly)

Grissom

Could you find that and turn it off, please? (Sara checks the clocks on the table, then finds it and turns it off. The alarm stops ringing. She picks up another clock)

Sara

Find the clock our guy used?

Grissom

(sighs): Not yet.

Sara'

This is a good choice. According to the bomb data center which has a record of every component used in any bomb -- from Ted Kaczynski to teenage boys playing with fireworks -- the most recent timing device of choice is made by TimeTell SnoozeWell, $10.99 at any local drugstore. (she hands him the clock)

Grissom

You spoiled all my fun. (Grissom starts to take apart the clock and Warrick walks in)

Grissom

Anything's possible.

Warrick

Catherine gave me this "FP" which was part of the Hansen bomb and I'm supposed to figure out what tool the bomber used to engrave it.

Grissom

You isolate the tool, and then we trace it.

Warrick

Yeah, but he could've used any number of things to initial it. I mean, screwdriver, a drill bit, a box cutter.

Grissom

It's the same as guns-- we eliminate them one at a time.

Warrick

*sigh* So what are you guys up to?

Sara

We're off to blow up some bombs

Warrick

Oh i definitely got the wrong end of this case!

Grissom

[Playing off Shakespeare's Hamlet] Alas, poor Warrick!

Catherine

419 at The Sphere, glass elevator. You're on it.

Warrick

This is a big case. I'm in a groove here.

Catherine

Well, groove on down to the Strip.

Warrick

Whatever happened to "You cross the tape, you go the distance"?

Catherine

I was probably saying that to get you to service my needs at the time.

Nick

(laughing) Marco? (Warrick dives under the water and gets the evidence and comes back up)

Warrick

Polo.

Nick

(teasing) You want to get out of there, sir? Pool closed at sundown.

Catherine

(joining in on teasing) Can I get you a towel, sir? (Warrick gets out of the pool)

Warrick

(dryly): Yeah, please.

Sara

Interesting voicemail you left me

Warrick

What's that?

Sara

Meet me behind CSI and bring a night gown? I'll wear it for you but uh, I prefer pajamas.

Sara

So that's why Grissom's late.

Warrick

You just don't like other women in his life.

Sara

I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that.

Sara

[coming into the room] What was that all about? Grissom signs?

Warrick

What does Grissom drink when he goes out at night?

Sara

He goes out?

Warrick

Exactly. Who knows anything about that guy?

Greg

I am the man.

Warrick

Why, what'd you do? Let me guess, you ran a DNA profile on the blood from the dead guy's knuckles and you got a match?

Greg

No.

Grissom

You ran a DNA profile and something very distinctive popped up?

Greg

Not quite.

Warrick

You made it out of bed and you dressed yourself?

Greg

...no.

Warrick

This sucks! But it's evidence, right?

Nick

No, hair and fiber is evidence, Warrick. This is combat duty.

Warrick

[Sitting in a rollercoaster seat] Whatever happened to my evaluation?

Grissom

You're sitting in it!

Warrick

[Getting onto a roller coaster with Grissom] I thought we were getting a beer.

Grissom

We are, after this.

Warrick

C'mon, Grissom, you know this is your thing. [Starts to get up]

Grissom

Ah-ah-ah! Every 9 years and 34 days, I feel like sharing. You'll like it. It cleanses you.

Warrick

Cleanses me? Whatever happened to my evaluation?

Grissom

You're sitting in it.

Warrick

Black tar heroin. This is the difference between a Cadillac and a Pinto.

Brass

How would you know?

Warrick

It's my job. I count at least six balloons, and that's just in the bedroom. The dealer must have come down the chimney. It's like Christmas in July here. Not that Braun even needed any more drugs.

Brass

Yeah, looks like the guy had a pill for everything. Can you get a print off those balloons?

Warrick

I can get a print off the air.

Catherine

No one can predict more than a few seconds into the future.

Nick

I predict I'll still be standing here one minute from now.

Warrick

Where are we going with this?

Grissom

Paige was in her dorm room and then ended up in the dumpster. Somewhere between her dorm room and the dumpster is our answer. That's where we're going. Coming, Nick?

Warrick

[to Nick] Nice try, Nostradamus.

Warrick

Where you been?

Grissom

I can't be everywhere, Warrick and they've banned human cloning.

Sara

You turned my pickle into a light bulb.

Grissom

I'm electrocuting it.

Sara

You sure are.

Warrick

That would explain that smell.

Grissom

You know this is how I cooked my hot dogs in college.

Warrick

[To Grissom] So you just proved murder.

Greg

I wouldn't break out that champagne just yet. Don't go shooting the messenger. Thumb print from the nail.